Guys are stupid. I'm a guy, but stupid for other reasons...
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Guys are stupid. I'm a guy, but stupid for other reasons...
My dumb ass alcoholic neighbor honestly thinks that girls want a guy with a huge penis. He's constantly pointing out how his other 'buddy' Rich has a small penis, how his is huge, etc. I try to tell him how he's a dumb ass and that girl are more interested in being treated well, having a good relationship, etc., but he still doesn't get it. What a moron. Why are some guys so dumb as to think that girls think like us...? Oh, he is 27, single, works a grease monkey job and pays child support so I guess he's not doing so hot anyway...
Just for the record, one tell tale sign of alcoholism is sexual immaturity (no I am not an alcoholic).
Just for the record, one tell tale sign of alcoholism is sexual immaturity (no I am not an alcoholic).
double edit: this was not my cup of tea
Last edited by Hamel on 2003-10-01 09:47pm, edited 2 times in total.
"Right now we can tell you a report was filed by the family of a 12 year old boy yesterday afternoon alleging Mr. Michael Jackson of criminal activity. A search warrant has been filed and that search is currently taking place. Mr. Jackson has not been charged with any crime. We cannot specifically address the content of the police report as it is confidential information at the present time, however, we can confirm that Mr. Jackson forced the boy to listen to the Howard Stern show and watch the movie Private Parts over and over again."
What the HELL is wrong with you, man?
Then I got a divorce. I REALLY finished last. So I turned into a fucking ASSHOLE. I treat women like SHIT. (That's not to say I beat them, or badmouth them, you get the picture.) By treating like shit I mean the following:
1. On dates. Dutch. At least, always. No exceptions.
2. "I LOVE you, Danny!" Danny-"Oooooooh kay..."
3. I tell them right off the bat, I am selfish. I like to be left alone. I am a Gamer, It isn't uncommon for me to be at my computer/xbox for 8-10 hours at a stretch.
4. When I'm gaming, leave me alone. No, I do not want sex, I do not and will not ever "Cuddle" with you. Unless it is cold.
5. As far as sex goes-once, twice a week, MAYBE. Please understand I Have little to no sex drive. Which is fine by me.
6. No flowers. Ever.
7. I have a small dick. Perhaps.....7 1/2....MAYBE 8 inches long when extraordinarily turned on.
8. I'm not romantic, AT ALL. I don't do love letters, poetry, mushy stories, romantic things like "Requesting" songs to be dedicated to you on the radio.
9. I don't do birthdays. I don't like them. PLEASE don't get me anything for my birthday. I will happily return this favor.
10. I suffer from Depression. No, you can't help me. Let me cry. you didn't do anything, You can't make it better. It is my pennance.(sp?)
I tell women all of these things on the first date. They LOVE it. I don't know if it's just the fact that I am honest and I don't hide anything or try to put my best face on....Wait a tic...
Why the FUCK do I always go off on some long-assed dissertation about dumb shit when a REALLY simple answer was all that was required? I coulda has an EASY +1...fuck it...
Too bad I'm afraid of commitment. I always bail when things get serious....
You must be on crack. Get that shit out of your head. Now. I used to be a romantic, The "Nice guy who finishes last"Superman wrote:I try to tell him how he's a dumb ass and that girl are more interested in being treated well, having a good relationship, etc.,
Then I got a divorce. I REALLY finished last. So I turned into a fucking ASSHOLE. I treat women like SHIT. (That's not to say I beat them, or badmouth them, you get the picture.) By treating like shit I mean the following:
1. On dates. Dutch. At least, always. No exceptions.
2. "I LOVE you, Danny!" Danny-"Oooooooh kay..."
3. I tell them right off the bat, I am selfish. I like to be left alone. I am a Gamer, It isn't uncommon for me to be at my computer/xbox for 8-10 hours at a stretch.
4. When I'm gaming, leave me alone. No, I do not want sex, I do not and will not ever "Cuddle" with you. Unless it is cold.
5. As far as sex goes-once, twice a week, MAYBE. Please understand I Have little to no sex drive. Which is fine by me.
6. No flowers. Ever.
7. I have a small dick. Perhaps.....7 1/2....MAYBE 8 inches long when extraordinarily turned on.
8. I'm not romantic, AT ALL. I don't do love letters, poetry, mushy stories, romantic things like "Requesting" songs to be dedicated to you on the radio.
9. I don't do birthdays. I don't like them. PLEASE don't get me anything for my birthday. I will happily return this favor.
10. I suffer from Depression. No, you can't help me. Let me cry. you didn't do anything, You can't make it better. It is my pennance.(sp?)
I tell women all of these things on the first date. They LOVE it. I don't know if it's just the fact that I am honest and I don't hide anything or try to put my best face on....Wait a tic...
Why the FUCK do I always go off on some long-assed dissertation about dumb shit when a REALLY simple answer was all that was required? I coulda has an EASY +1...fuck it...
Too bad I'm afraid of commitment. I always bail when things get serious....
- Einhander Sn0m4n
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Chardok, I don't know if you've seen my pic but I work out alot. I am also a wrestler on a smaller wrestling circuit. Just for the record, before I met my girl I was juicing (steroids) and would sometimes experience what we call 'roid rage.' I remember I got the most girls when I was the biggest asshole. Sad but true.
Wonder Why chicks dig assholes? That seems wierd to me, too...Oh well, whatever works...and frankly, it's kinda easier to be a butthead. Mayhaps they enjoy the challenge? (My apologies to any women offended by my comments, I only give examples from personal experience, and when I say "Women" I mean in the context of my particular set of observed phenomena.)
There. *Whew* Glad I got that disclaimer in before I got branded....
There. *Whew* Glad I got that disclaimer in before I got branded....
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Any guy who constantly brags about his own penis or (worse yet) makes fun of other guys' penises has a serious male insecurity problem.
Obviously, the size of a guy's penis is not particularly important when dating, if only for the fact that no woman will ever see your penis until you've already impressed her enough for her to let you have sex with her. If you've already reached that point, then she's not going to change her opinion about you just because you're not armed with Lexington Steele's footlong schlong (although I could see it being a problem if it was really short, like an inch, which I've heard of in some cases).
Anyway, you should simply ask him to go to the nearest adult toy shop and ask the clerk what size of dildo most women buy for themselves. He'll probably be shocked when he finds out that they buy average-sized ones instead of the giant freakshow models.
As for women preferring assholes, that's been done to death on this board many times in many threads already. Suffice it to say that some women prefer assholes. Do not generalize.
Obviously, the size of a guy's penis is not particularly important when dating, if only for the fact that no woman will ever see your penis until you've already impressed her enough for her to let you have sex with her. If you've already reached that point, then she's not going to change her opinion about you just because you're not armed with Lexington Steele's footlong schlong (although I could see it being a problem if it was really short, like an inch, which I've heard of in some cases).
Anyway, you should simply ask him to go to the nearest adult toy shop and ask the clerk what size of dildo most women buy for themselves. He'll probably be shocked when he finds out that they buy average-sized ones instead of the giant freakshow models.
As for women preferring assholes, that's been done to death on this board many times in many threads already. Suffice it to say that some women prefer assholes. Do not generalize.
"It's not evil for God to do it. Or for someone to do it at God's command."- Jonathan Boyd on baby-killing
"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC
"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness
"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC
"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness
"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
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Re: Guys are stupid. I'm a guy, but stupid for other reason
Seems as though my statment about 'the more you brag about your sexual exploits, the more likely it is that it never happened' has gone to your head.Superman wrote:My dumb ass alcoholic neighbor honestly thinks that girls want a guy with a huge penis. He's constantly pointing out how his other 'buddy' Rich has a small penis, how his is huge, etc. I try to tell him how he's a dumb ass and that girl are more interested in being treated well, having a good relationship, etc., but he still doesn't get it. What a moron. Why are some guys so dumb as to think that girls think like us...? Oh, he is 27, single, works a grease monkey job and pays child support so I guess he's not doing so hot anyway...
Just for the record, one tell tale sign of alcoholism is sexual immaturity (no I am not an alcoholic).
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That isn't really being an asshole, and it's definitely not treating girls like shit; it's being *honest*, which is GOOD.Chardok wrote:What the HELL is wrong with you, man?
You must be on crack. Get that shit out of your head. Now. I used to be a romantic, The "Nice guy who finishes last"Superman wrote:I try to tell him how he's a dumb ass and that girl are more interested in being treated well, having a good relationship, etc.,
Then I got a divorce. I REALLY finished last. So I turned into a fucking ASSHOLE. I treat women like SHIT. (That's not to say I beat them, or badmouth them, you get the picture.) By treating like shit I mean the following:
1. On dates. Dutch. At least, always. No exceptions.
2. "I LOVE you, Danny!" Danny-"Oooooooh kay..."
3. I tell them right off the bat, I am selfish. I like to be left alone. I am a Gamer, It isn't uncommon for me to be at my computer/xbox for 8-10 hours at a stretch.
4. When I'm gaming, leave me alone. No, I do not want sex, I do not and will not ever "Cuddle" with you. Unless it is cold.
5. As far as sex goes-once, twice a week, MAYBE. Please understand I Have little to no sex drive. Which is fine by me.
6. No flowers. Ever.
7. I have a small dick. Perhaps.....7 1/2....MAYBE 8 inches long when extraordinarily turned on.
8. I'm not romantic, AT ALL. I don't do love letters, poetry, mushy stories, romantic things like "Requesting" songs to be dedicated to you on the radio.
9. I don't do birthdays. I don't like them. PLEASE don't get me anything for my birthday. I will happily return this favor.
10. I suffer from Depression. No, you can't help me. Let me cry. you didn't do anything, You can't make it better. It is my pennance.(sp?)
I tell women all of these things on the first date. They LOVE it. I don't know if it's just the fact that I am honest and I don't hide anything or try to put my best face on....Wait a tic...
Why the FUCK do I always go off on some long-assed dissertation about dumb shit when a REALLY simple answer was all that was required? I coulda has an EASY +1...fuck it...
Too bad I'm afraid of commitment. I always bail when things get serious....
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And you honestly feel you will accomplish more this way?Chardok wrote:You must be on crack. Get that shit out of your head. Now. I used to be a romantic, The "Nice guy who finishes last". Then I got a divorce. I REALLY finished last. So I turned into a fucking ASSHOLE. I treat women like SHIT.
You have serious problems.1. On dates. Dutch. At least, always. No exceptions.
2. "I LOVE you, Danny!" Danny-"Oooooooh kay..."
3. I tell them right off the bat, I am selfish. I like to be left alone. I am a Gamer, It isn't uncommon for me to be at my computer/xbox for 8-10 hours at a stretch.
4. When I'm gaming, leave me alone. No, I do not want sex, I do not and will not ever "Cuddle" with you. Unless it is cold.
5. As far as sex goes-once, twice a week, MAYBE. Please understand I Have little to no sex drive. Which is fine by me.
And what's that attitude supposed to accomplish?6. No flowers. Ever.
What does your penis size have to do with the way you treat women?7. I have a small dick. Perhaps.....7 1/2....MAYBE 8 inches long when extraordinarily turned on.
Why not? Would it hurt you to do so?8. I'm not romantic, AT ALL. I don't do love letters, poetry, mushy stories, romantic things like "Requesting" songs to be dedicated to you on the radio.
Not even going out for dinner? That's not being unromantic; that's just being a party-pooper.9. I don't do birthdays. I don't like them. PLEASE don't get me anything for my birthday. I will happily return this favor.
Honestly, if this is the real you, then why do you feel that your divorce must have been her fault rather than yours, ie- "nice guys finish last?" I find it hard to believe that this is your true character yet you were a genuinely attentive, caring husband before the divorce.10. I suffer from Depression. No, you can't help me. Let me cry. you didn't do anything, You can't make it better. It is my pennance.(sp?)
Certain kinds of women like to hear bad stuff because they have no faith in humanity and they are more comfortable when they find out exactly how much of an asshole a man is. If a man seems nice, that type of girl will get uncomfortable because they simply can't accept it as genuine. This kind of girl will tend to get into an unending cycle of bad relationships.I tell women all of these things on the first date. They LOVE it. I don't know if it's just the fact that I am honest and I don't hide anything or try to put my best face on....Wait a tic...
No, it's being honest about being an asshole.Audrie_Dawn wrote:That isn't really being an asshole, and it's definitely not treating girls like shit; it's being *honest*, which is GOOD.
"It's not evil for God to do it. Or for someone to do it at God's command."- Jonathan Boyd on baby-killing
"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC
"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness
"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC
"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness
"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
- Illuminatus Primus
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Amen there, brother.Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:Sez me with my well-sucked 8 inch dick...
I cannot stand girls who constantly talk about guy's penis size. Likewise with guys.
You'll consistently find that it is the sexually immature girls and guys who do it: the ones with security problems, bad history, etc.
Last edited by Illuminatus Primus on 2003-10-02 06:11pm, edited 1 time in total.
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"This statement, in its utterly clueless hubristic stupidity, cannot be improved upon. I merely quote it in admiration of its perfection." - Garibaldi in reply to an incredibly stupid post.
The Fifth Illuminatus Primus | Warsie | Skeptical Empiricist | Florida Gator | Sustainability Advocate | Libertarian Socialist |
I have honestly never heard of something like this.Chardok wrote:
4. When I'm gaming, leave me alone. No, I do not want sex, I do not and will not ever "Cuddle" with you. Unless it is cold.
5. As far as sex goes-once, twice a week, MAYBE. Please understand I Have little to no sex drive. Which is fine by me.
delicious pies
Mike- I guess I should have elaborated.... I used to be a hopeless romantic. doing all the things I don't do anymore..I know it sounds terrible, but that's just me. Anyway, I suppose I'm happier being alone, because I feel I'm really the only one who can put up with my bullshit!
But seriously, I'm sure someday I'll turn a corner and revert, maybe I'll even meet someone new to spend my life with, but my divorce is still relatively recent (1 1/2...maybe 2 years) So I'll pull out. Until then...
Penis size has nothing to do with how I treat women...that was more for comedic effect
But seriously, I'm sure someday I'll turn a corner and revert, maybe I'll even meet someone new to spend my life with, but my divorce is still relatively recent (1 1/2...maybe 2 years) So I'll pull out. Until then...
Penis size has nothing to do with how I treat women...that was more for comedic effect
I suppose so. Never thought of it like that, but you are right... Oh Well!Darth Wong wrote:No, it's being honest about being an asshole.
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Ridiculously Long URL
Above is a good site for that, here's a quote...
Above is a good site for that, here's a quote...
I can feel the similarities...When you are in a platonic relationship with the girl of your
dreams, she will go out with countless insensitive jerks who
treat her like dirt and you will have to painfully listen to her
lament over her misfortunes in the arena of love. She will describe
for you the sort of man that she is _really_ looking for, but she will
never realize that she is describing you to a tee. The reason for this
is that she does not really want the sort of man she describes. Most
women prefer jerks whether they realize it or not. -- Sidewinder
Exactly, This is the story of my life.When you are in a platonic relationship with the girl of your
dreams, she will go out with countless insensitive jerks who
treat her like dirt and you will have to painfully listen to her
lament over her misfortunes in the arena of love. She will describe
for you the sort of man that she is _really_ looking for, but she will
never realize that she is describing you to a tee. The reason for this
is that she does not really want the sort of man she describes. Most
women prefer jerks whether they realize it or not. -- Sidewinder
Iraq Weather Report: Sunni today, Shi’ite Tommorow
The Late Knights of Conan O'Brien - Frankenstein...Wasting a minute of your time!
The Late Knights of Conan O'Brien - Frankenstein...Wasting a minute of your time!
Bullshit. Of all the girls I've dated, this describes maybe one or two.Xenophobe3691 wrote:When you are in a platonic relationship with the girl of your
dreams, she will go out with countless insensitive jerks who
treat her like dirt and you will have to painfully listen to her
lament over her misfortunes in the arena of love. She will describe
for you the sort of man that she is _really_ looking for, but she will
never realize that she is describing you to a tee. The reason for this
is that she does not really want the sort of man she describes. Most
women prefer jerks whether they realize it or not. -- Sidewinder
Unless of course, you think I'M a jerk, in which case the reverse is true.
JADAFETWA
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A more accurate analysis would be 'some women are attracted to or interested in jerks'. From what I've gathered, most of such women are emotionally immature, intelllectually undeveloped, confused about running their lives, and generally lacking in complex communication skills. Never has been my type.
By His Word...