The new Treknology thread

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2002-09-28 03:53pm

This is a continuation of the old "Treknology" thread. I decided to start a new one because I thought that it would be more convienent that continuing the old one, and John Clark made a bunch of stupid replies in the last one.

I'll start:

Toothpaste would be "quantum nanobotic oral hydneic cleansing gelatinous matter". When put on the "applicator for the quantum nanobotic oral hygenic cleaning gelatinous matter" (toothbrush), the nanobots each pick off plaque from your teeth. Then, they fly out of the mouth, and discard themselves in the "quantum subatomic waste incinerator".

In one episode, the nanobots, on the verge of acheving sentinence, rebel against the person using them, who happens to be a high-ranking SF offical, by choking him. Then it's up to Wesley Crusher, Janeway, and Data to rescue him.

SWPIGWANG · Post by **SWPIGWANG** » 2002-09-28 05:24pm

waries would be Sub-luminal turbo energist transdimensional hyperspacial self-contained antineutronium subspace dipolar inversion life form that would require transphasic destructive warp distortionary expansionary defection light tri-cobot genesis nano power mutiplication dupicating holographic subspace transverse darkstar subatomic dilithum phaser energization conversion to beat.

Dooey Jo · Post by **Dooey Jo** » 2002-09-29 12:43pm

Monopolar subatomic shityon magnetic forcefield inducing device with a coronyonic homogenifying subatomic waste production annihalator.
This means... I don't know really, got lost in the babble...

Smalleyjedi · Post by **Smalleyjedi** » 2002-09-29 10:14pm

o, thats just a magnetic trash compressor.

Isolder74 · Post by **Isolder74** » 2002-09-30 05:36pm

this one's real and was used in a Trek Episode

"There is intermittent contact in the input polarizers"

which means a short(iron filing) in the part mentioned. The best example of when they go too far ie using fancy words when the origional words are simplier more concise and acually say something. BTW engineers don't go around making new words for things they use the old standys. For example when we talk about fixing a computer program we say we're "debugging" it but we no longer have to go through all of the relays and vacume tube to remove all of the moths that have gotten stuck in the contacts overnight. My two bits

Isolder74 · Post by **Isolder74** » 2002-09-30 06:50pm

oh great another one

Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman · Post by **Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman** » 2002-09-30 10:51pm

I just wonder:

What is the Treknobabble for "Dildo"??

(no, I'm serious. I really wannna know ' bout this.)

paladin · Post by **paladin** » 2002-10-01 12:10am

Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman wrote:I just wonder:

What is the Treknobabble for "Dildo"??

(no, I'm serious. I really wannna know ' bout this.)

Picard

Alferd Packer · Post by **Alferd Packer** » 2002-10-01 12:41am

Rakka Rakka Rakka!

Hmm, dildo...

Polymer-based oscillatory autocoital climactic enabler.

Enlightenment · Post by **Enlightenment** » 2002-10-01 03:34am

Isolder74 wrote: "There is intermittent contact in the input polarizers"

which means a short(iron filing) in the part mentioned.

No, it means that there was an intermittent contact in a portion of Data's hardware. The cause of the intermittent contact happened to be an iron filing but the diagnostic statement that there was an intermittent contact was entirely correct.

The only technobabble the line is 'input polarizers,' as that term is utterly meaningless.

EmperorMing · Post by **EmperorMing** » 2002-10-01 04:00am

Alferd Packer wrote:Rakka Rakka Rakka!

Hmm, dildo...

Polymer-based oscillatory autocoital climactic enabler.

LOL!!

Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman · Post by **Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman** » 2002-10-01 07:12am

paladin wrote:
Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman wrote:I just wonder:

What is the Treknobabble for "Dildo"??

(no, I'm serious. I really wannna know ' bout this.)
Picard

LOL! Never have a good laugh since reading Wayne Poe's hate mail page!!!

Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman · Post by **Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman** » 2002-10-01 07:21am

Alferd Packer wrote:Rakka Rakka Rakka!

Hmm, dildo...

Polymer-based oscillatory autocoital climactic enabler.

How about treknobabble for condom?

How about this:
Phallus-encapsulating unwanted copulation inhibitor.

Isolder74 · Post by **Isolder74** » 2002-10-01 09:31am

Enlightenment wrote:
Isolder74 wrote: "There is intermittent contact in the input polarizers"

which means a short(iron filing) in the part mentioned.
No, it means that there was an intermittent contact in a portion of Data's hardware. The cause of the intermittent contact happened to be an iron filing but the diagnostic statement that there was an intermittent contact was entirely correct.

The only technobabble the line is 'input polarizers,' as that term is utterly meaningless.

your not an engineer are you. Intermittent contact actually means nothing engineeringwise. and an extra use of meaningless words when one word(short) works fine.

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2002-10-01 11:22am

How about a Treknobabble term for "Fisting Grease" (Crisco)?

Lata and Happy Fist- on better thought, I don't like that.... LOL bye!

paladin · Post by **paladin** » 2002-10-01 03:21pm

Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman wrote:
Alferd Packer wrote:Rakka Rakka Rakka!

Hmm, dildo...

Polymer-based oscillatory autocoital climactic enabler.

How about treknobabble for condom?

How about this:
Phallus-encapsulating unwanted copulation inhibitor.

Riker, Jr.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2002-10-01 05:11pm

A mug would be a "quantum thermal encasement cylinder". It would use forcefields and a M-AM-powered heater to keep drinks from getting cold. It would also contain a compute recording all the fluids put into it.

A light switch would be a "photon luminoscity control conduit". It would have a touchscreen which controls the light power in a room. In one episode, the pasma conduit is re-rouded ot he core, and when it is turned off, the Enterprise nearly blows up.

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2002-10-01 10:22pm

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:How about a Treknobabble term for "Fisting Grease" (Crisco)? Lata and Happy Fist- on better thought, I don't like that.... LOL bye!

Fisting Grease=Digital Manipulator Friction Compensation Gel

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2002-10-01 11:41pm

Fisting Grease=Digital Manipulator Friction Compensation Gel

It should be Fisting Grease=Digital RECTAL Manipulator Friction Compensation Gel

Lata and Put that Fisting Grease Away Before You Get Us All Killed!

Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman · Post by **Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman** » 2002-10-02 04:30am

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:
Fisting Grease=Digital Manipulator Friction Compensation Gel
It should be Fisting Grease=Digital RECTAL Manipulator Friction Compensation Gel Lata and Put that Fisting Grease Away Before You Get Us All Killed!

LOL! Note the keyword RECTAL.

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2002-10-03 04:30pm

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:
Fisting Grease=Digital Manipulator Friction Compensation Gel
It should be Fisting Grease=Digital RECTAL Manipulator Friction Compensation Gel Lata and Put that Fisting Grease Away Before You Get Us All Killed!

No, no, RECTAL is too simple a word... maybe:

Fisting Grease=Subcolonic Digital Manipulator Friction Compensation Gel

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2002-10-03 04:31pm

Or, to make it REALLY technical: SDM/FCG

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2002-10-03 04:36pm

Condom=Polymeric Biomatter Containment System
Garden hose=Hydrokinetic Flow Constrictor
Turd=Biomass
Breasts=Tandem gravitic dorsal lactation matrix

SWPIGWANG · Post by **SWPIGWANG** » 2002-10-06 02:49pm

this is cross posting, but I wrote a technobabble poem!

Transpacial anti-gravitonic multi-tasking levitating device
Lifts the multi-purpose high efficiency multi-story planetory base
Off the M-Class medium gaseous hydro-liquefied surface
To actively enguage in catalyze habitation expansion progress
In order to extract muti-elemental high loading ore orifice
Under elevavted mass induced time space distortion in this case
Just to power superluminal laser contained plasmic lance
The tri-magnetic hyperspace field absorbs all possible threats
No capital axillary starship could have their shields brace
Such unholy hyper-dimensional energon pentration munitions
And the Enterprise and its crew shall not survive their death
In the hands of superior engineering with destructive powers

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2002-10-07 07:16pm

SWPIGWANG wrote:this is cross posting, but I wrote a technobabble poem!

Transpacial anti-gravitonic multi-tasking levitating device
Lifts the multi-purpose high efficiency multi-story planetory base
Off the M-Class medium gaseous hydro-liquefied surface
To actively enguage in catalyze habitation expansion progress
In order to extract muti-elemental high loading ore orifice
Under elevavted mass induced time space distortion in this case
Just to power superluminal laser contained plasmic lance
The tri-magnetic hyperspace field absorbs all possible threats
No capital axillary starship could have their shields brace
Such unholy hyper-dimensional energon pentration munitions
And the Enterprise and its crew shall not survive their death
In the hands of superior engineering with destructive powers

Yes... they will not survive their death... hmm... sort of redundant. And repetitive. And it says the same thing twice.