Hollywood to Guide Middle East Peace

Nathan F · Post by **Nathan F** » 2003-10-29 07:44pm

Hehehe, this is quite funny:

link

Brad Pitt, Jennifer Aniston in peace mission

29oct03

BILL Clinton failed, Tony Blair drew a blank and Kofi Annan made little progress. But now a team of Hollywood film stars is about to visit the Middle East on a private peace mission, in the belief that their charms will work magic on the Israeli-Arab conflict.

Brad Pitt, his wife, Jennifer Aniston, Danny DeVito, Edward Norton and Jason Alexander are among the stars who aim to succeed where world statesmen have stumbled.
"The past few years of conflict mean that yet another generation of Israelis and Palestinians will grow up in hatred," reads a statement from Pitt and Aniston. "We cannot allow that to happen."

Just how they intend to stop it is not entirely clear. The logic behind their mission, a $4 million peace initiative called One Voice that will take place before the end of the year, is not especially sophisticated.

Pitt and Aniston believe that most people in the region want a negotiated settlement with an end to violence and imagine that by appealing directly to "ordinary folk," they can bring the warring parties together.

"From time to time, some celebrities think that they might help, and the media amplifies their mission," says Oz Almog, an Israeli sociologist. "But this is an incredibly complex situation and I am afraid they are naive.

"Many Palestinians do not even have television sets," he continues. "What is more, for the past three years here no one has listened to anyone, so what makes these people think they will listen to Danny DeVito?"

Ah, dontcha love how Hollywood celebs think that because they are on TV, they are automatically some kind of great statesman or diplomat?

Xenophobe3691 · Post by **Xenophobe3691** » 2003-10-29 07:46pm

I find that funny as hell. The Palestinians sure as hell aren't gonna know who they are, and if they do, will probably deride them as rich, spoiled American brats. This is gonna be worth a laugh...

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2003-10-29 08:16pm

How can crazy rich actors appeal to ordinary folk?

Soontir C'boath · Post by **Soontir C'boath** » 2003-10-29 08:53pm

Howedar wrote:How can crazy rich actors appeal to ordinary folk?

Well, they do have four mil to spend.

Just, how will they give/spend is the question.

What will they do with the money?

~Jason

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2003-10-29 09:03pm

Play nice with each other or we'll broadcast our crappy movies on every channel in the Middle East

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-10-29 09:38pm

What's their plan for uniting them? To annoy them to be point where both of them will team up and drive them out of the Middle East?

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-10-29 09:40pm

They probably believe that Bono really did solve the third world's problems, so they plan to emulate his success.

Nathan F · Post by **Nathan F** » 2003-10-29 09:46pm

Darth Wong wrote:They probably believe that Bono really did solve the third world's problems, so they plan to emulate his success.

You...you....you mean he DIDN'T?!

Solauren · Post by **Solauren** » 2003-10-29 09:47pm

2 simple words: Publicity Stunt.
I mean, friends is going off the air, right?

Nathan F · Post by **Nathan F** » 2003-10-30 12:16am

Solauren wrote:2 simple words: Publicity Stunt.
I mean, friends is going off the air, right?

What, exactly, are they going to say when they fail miserably? I mean, I wish that we could have peace in the middle east, but lets face it, a bunch of half wit celebrities aren't going to make it happen.

RedImperator · Post by **RedImperator** » 2003-10-30 01:13am

Rich halfwits thinking they can singlehandedly bring about world peace aren't exactly a new phenomonon. Henry Ford and a bevy of niwits tried to stop WWI.

Xenophobe3691 · Post by **Xenophobe3691** » 2003-10-30 01:31am

RedImperator wrote:Rich halfwits thinking they can singlehandedly bring about world peace aren't exactly a new phenomonon. Henry Ford and a bevy of niwits tried to stop WWI.

That whole war was a huge clusterfuck caused by a shitload of alliances and one stupid terrorist, I doubt one man could stop alliances planned over decades and built with teams of trained diplomats...

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2003-10-30 04:15am

Could be worse, we could send them Britney, Aguilarra & Maddonna

*Arab world*
We agree to everything, just take away those awful devil women.

Nathan F · Post by **Nathan F** » 2003-10-30 10:25am

The Yosemite Bear wrote:Could be worse, we could send them Britney, Aguilarra & Maddonna

*Arab world*
We agree to everything, just take away those awful devil women.

No, they would just bury them to their necks and stone them. Which wouldn't exactly be a bad thing...

Post by **Coyote** » 2003-10-30 11:32am

Damn, I thought this was some sort of Onion-esque parody....