I'm Getting a Cat!

Bob McDob · Post by **Bob McDob** » 2003-11-20 12:47am

Hurrah!!!

Anything I should know?

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-11-20 12:51am

Well aside from that it will rule your household.

Teach it not to claw things(or persuade it to claw a scratching post instead).

not much else...they are pretty easy pets...and generally lounge about.

SyntaxVorlon · Post by **SyntaxVorlon** » 2003-11-20 01:01am

A spritz bottle when it goes on the floor, or is scratching a chair. Oh and if you can get the big cat toy that has a ball on a track on the outside and a circle of corrugated cardboard on the inside they can be kept pretty keen.
Oh and don't spend too much on cat toys, my cats play more with the caps off of Hershey's syrup bottles and little stuffed dinosaurs than any of the furry parafinalia that my mother has bought over the past decade.

SylasGaunt · Post by **SylasGaunt** » 2003-11-20 01:03am

And always remember.. that cat owns you not the other way around

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2003-11-20 01:21am

I cannot overstress the importance of getting a litter box that's easy to clean and putting it in a location that's easy to find for Kitty yet doesn't stink up the house. Also get cat litter that can kill the ammonia smell. That is at least 95% of the stink from litter.

Also, get it neutered/spayed and vaccinated, or you'll have one sick cat with a bad habit of suddenly turning into eight cats!

P.S. Don't get any more than three cats. One whiff of an overripe litterbox and you will know why RFQ (Real Quick).

P.P.S. Some cats will quickly build up a tolerance for spray bottles and will only be budged by somewhat heavier firepower. I don't think you wanna find that out the Hard Way when Kitty can shrug off a blast from one of these:

Trust me, I've seen it myself...

Trytostaydead · Post by **Trytostaydead** » 2003-11-20 01:36am

Bob McDob wrote:Hurrah!!!

Anything I should know?

Yes, how to make a good taco out of it.. mmm

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2003-11-20 01:37am

Use multiple scratching posts. Cats will use them, but not if they have to walk to the other side of the house to do so, you basically need one per room with easily damaged furniture. Though if its an outdoor cat you may never have any problems.

Metrion Cascade · Post by **Metrion Cascade** » 2003-11-20 01:42am

Get multiple Nerf guns. They can get used to water. They can't get used to foam. And Nerf balls/darts/arrows are easier to clean up than water.

A laser can be fun too, but after a while they realize the dot isn't a particularly meaty catch.

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-11-20 01:56am

Cats will demand love from you, but only when they feel like it, which is always when it is least convenient for you. And they will wake you up from the deepest sleep imaginable if they really need to have their ears scratched in that way only you can. They will find their own favourite way of doing so, but rest assured, it's not the way in which you wish they would choose to wake you up.

Lilith · Post by **Lilith** » 2003-11-20 02:28am

Cats always manage to sleep right between you and whoever else. Attention is often on their terms--my old cat would ignore me most of the time but when she decided that I was worthy of giving her a scratch, she'd sit on the middle of my newspaper.

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2003-11-20 02:56am

Metrion Cascade wrote:Get multiple Nerf guns. They can get used to water. They can't get used to foam. And Nerf balls/darts/arrows are easier to clean up than water.

A laser can be fun too, but after a while they realize the dot isn't a particularly meaty catch.

I never thought about the Nerf Bolter approach. Lasers work great too!

Also if you have a blowgun, you can make foam pellets (or use those cheap bullet-shaped foam ear plugs!) that fit your bore size (usually .40 or .50 caliber). Better yet, just get a second short one and mark it as foam/stun-darts only. And there's always the Spitball Approach. Get some TP or paper towels (you'll really only need one square anyway), get it sopping wet, and smush 'er down the barrel.

DANGER: MAKE DAMN SURE THE THING ISN'T LOADED WITH KILLING DARTS WHEN USING A BLOWGUN OR YOU WILL KILL THE CAT!!! Even short blowguns (>12 inches) can do a lot of damage. Besides, if you keep a blowgun lying around with a dart in the chamber, you don't deserve to have one! You Have Been Warned.

Post by **NecronLord** » 2003-11-20 03:09am

Only on SD.net does over 50% of advice on pets take the form of what to shoot it with.

Batman · Post by **Batman** » 2003-11-20 03:31am

NecronLord wrote:Only on SD.net does over 50% of advice on pets take the form of what to shoot it with.

Indeed. And I thought you were nice people.
I can't shoot a cat. People, yes, but not cats.

Einy-damn! I didn't know they come with bipods...

Bob-before you flop down somewhere where there's a chance you may wind up with the cat in your lap, take a leak. You may not feel like you need one,
but you WILL by the time the cat is half asleep in your lap, purring like mad, obviously utterly content, and when only a complete asshole would disturb it.
THEN, you'll desperately need to take that leak .

Oh, and bastard.

I wish I had a cat

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2003-11-20 03:34am

Beware sleeping at times when the cat needs attention. The classic dancing on your head manoeuvre is just one of many ways for the feline to get you up at 0600 just so he/she can have some biccies or go out for a bit.

If you get a cat with the voice of mine, pray to some deity no matter how ludicrous that she loses the voice one day.

Remember...

...appearances can be deceiving.

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-11-20 03:36am

If you have any trouble you could just show it the scene from Boondock Saints.

Metrion Cascade · Post by **Metrion Cascade** » 2003-11-20 03:49am

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:
Metrion Cascade wrote:Get multiple Nerf guns. They can get used to water. They can't get used to foam. And Nerf balls/darts/arrows are easier to clean up than water.

A laser can be fun too, but after a while they realize the dot isn't a particularly meaty catch.
I never thought about the Nerf Bolter approach. Lasers work great too!

Also if you have a blowgun, you can make foam pellets (or use those cheap bullet-shaped foam ear plugs!) that fit your bore size (usually .40 or .50 caliber). Better yet, just get a second short one and mark it as foam/stun-darts only. And there's always the Spitball Approach. Get some TP or paper towels (you'll really only need one square anyway), get it sopping wet, and smush 'er down the barrel.

DANGER: MAKE DAMN SURE THE THING ISN'T LOADED WITH KILLING DARTS WHEN USING A BLOWGUN OR YOU WILL KILL THE CAT!!! Even short blowguns (>12 inches) can do a lot of damage. Besides, if you keep a blowgun lying around with a dart in the chamber, you don't deserve to have one! You Have Been Warned.

Einy? Sweetie? Where in THE FUCK did you get a real blowgun and darts?

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2003-11-20 03:52am

Metrion Cascade wrote:
Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:
Metrion Cascade wrote:Get multiple Nerf guns. They can get used to water. They can't get used to foam. And Nerf balls/darts/arrows are easier to clean up than water.

A laser can be fun too, but after a while they realize the dot isn't a particularly meaty catch.
I never thought about the Nerf Bolter approach. Lasers work great too!

Also if you have a blowgun, you can make foam pellets (or use those cheap bullet-shaped foam ear plugs!) that fit your bore size (usually .40 or .50 caliber). Better yet, just get a second short one and mark it as foam/stun-darts only. And there's always the Spitball Approach. Get some TP or paper towels (you'll really only need one square anyway), get it sopping wet, and smush 'er down the barrel.

DANGER: MAKE DAMN SURE THE THING ISN'T LOADED WITH KILLING DARTS WHEN USING A BLOWGUN OR YOU WILL KILL THE CAT!!! Even short blowguns (>12 inches) can do a lot of damage. Besides, if you keep a blowgun lying around with a dart in the chamber, you don't deserve to have one! You Have Been Warned.
Einy? Sweetie? Where in THE FUCK did you get a real blowgun and darts?

I got it at a Redneck Convention. I also scored several Shurikens and a 16-inch Big Black Bowie knife on that trip too. I eventually want to learn metalworking and get a house with a garage so I can make my own custom weapons.

BTW in twenty years or so you'll recognize my house by the Homemade Trebuchet, Spud Guns, and various other Weapons of Mass Destruction around the yard...

His Divine Shadow · Post by **His Divine Shadow** » 2003-11-20 06:58am

Bob McDob wrote:Hurrah!!!

Chardok · Post by **Chardok** » 2003-11-20 07:04am

Metrion- you can get blowguns and darts at many flea markets (Bonus poison and superflight darts if it one of einy's redneck flea markets)

Bob- congrats, cats are the neatest pets, I had three at one time (Landlord where I live now will not authorize a cat.) Really, the only thing you need to know is treat the cat like you would any other person, and she'll take good care of you. I don't know about the rest of the folks here, but a cat sleeping near your head, (Or in my old cat's case, draped across the top of your head), purring, will lull you off to sleep in no time! Try to find a cat which has an 8-cylinder purring system, not one of those worthless little wimpy import Honda-civic purrs. I love kitty purrs. And they do such funny things, too! Take a Pepsi bottle cap, turn it so the flat side is down and slide it across the carpet towards kitty-kitty. Hilarity ensues! (Trust me. just do it!

) Also, one of those things on an elastic string that hang from door jambs are GREAT entertainment! you've never seen an animal jump so high! Cats are natural acrobats!

I miss my kitty kitties....mayhaps I shall obtain another one day.

His Divine Shadow · Post by **His Divine Shadow** » 2003-11-20 07:07am

Chardok wrote:Try to find a cat which has an 8-cylinder purring system, not one of those worthless little wimpy import Honda-civic purrs. I love kitty purrs.

One of our cats is like this, she purrs really really hard and loud, sounds like someone is revving a V8.

Batman · Post by **Batman** » 2003-11-20 07:12am

His Divine Shadow wrote:
Chardok wrote:Try to find a cat which has an 8-cylinder purring system, not one of those worthless little wimpy import Honda-civic purrs. I love kitty purrs.
One of our cats is like this, she purrs really really hard and loud, sounds like someone is revving a V8.

And you're a bastard, too.

You could at least have the decency to NOT tell us poor souls who no longer are cat posessions how happy you are being one

His Divine Shadow · Post by **His Divine Shadow** » 2003-11-20 07:16am

We have three cats

Batman · Post by **Batman** » 2003-11-20 07:24am

His Divine Shadow wrote:We have three cats

That's right, rub it in why dont you.

*puts HDS on the list*

Ace Pace · Post by **Ace Pace** » 2003-11-20 07:27am

And don't tell the even poorer souls who are half allergic to cat hair, yet love them

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2003-11-20 07:32am

Keep it away from your genitals. Ask Hemlockgrey & Einy about that one.

StarDestroyer.Net BBS

I'm Getting a Cat!

I'm Getting a Cat!

Re: I'm Getting a Cat!

Re: I'm Getting a Cat!