How Stravo Got His Groove Back

2000AD · Post by **2000AD** » 2003-11-25 03:43pm

Hmmmm ... Darkstar, he's popping up all other the place!
Still funny but wheres the nuke?

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-11-25 03:49pm

Aya wrote:Points at my name and clears throat.

Doh--forgot about your little print. *contemplates* Well....ok. *grabs keys, jumps into car and drives down to VA, picking up Alyeska on the way*

Jason von Evil · Post by **Jason von Evil** » 2003-11-25 04:15pm

Zaia wrote:
Aya wrote:Points at my name and clears throat.
Doh--forgot about your little print. *contemplates* Well....ok. *grabs keys, jumps into car and drives down to VA, picking up Alyeska on the way*

Yay!

Darth Fanboy · Post by **Darth Fanboy** » 2003-11-25 04:51pm

ZAIA: Um?

KUJA: I saw this office downstairs-

ZAIA: Let's go!

*she grabs his arm and they run off

the potential for disaster here, is by far greater than the actual probability of the Black Mage's success....

Of course if Fanboy were there things would be different, but my guess is that he's back on the West Coast what with the distance that explosion carried him....

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-11-25 04:54pm

Aya wrote:
Zaia wrote:Doh--forgot about your little print. *contemplates* Well....ok. *grabs keys, jumps into car and drives down to VA, picking up Alyeska on the way*
Yay!

So you don't mind a threesome with Alyeska and me?

And damn, Kuj, no one thinks you're going to end up gettin' any play. I think I might be offended at that if I were you...

Singular Quartet · Post by **Singular Quartet** » 2003-11-25 05:55pm

Zaia wrote:
Aya wrote:
Zaia wrote:Doh--forgot about your little print. *contemplates* Well....ok. *grabs keys, jumps into car and drives down to VA, picking up Alyeska on the way*
Yay!
So you don't mind a threesome with Alyeska and me?

And damn, Kuj, no one thinks you're going to end up gettin' any play. I think I might be offended at that if I were you...

I figure he's got about 50-50 shot. He is the author, so it would be in his best intrests, but it's also a humour fic, so you two might get interupted....

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-11-25 06:12pm

I don't know what all of you are talking about, all Kuja said was that he had a room available, and Zaia wanted to see it

... *cowers in the corner and whimpers at the nasty people with their evil temptations*

Captain Cyran · Post by **Captain Cyran** » 2003-11-25 11:16pm

*blink*

Why the hell did I let Scooter in?

Oh yeah, now I remember. I'm gonna strap him to the nuke...

Good chapter Kuja.

Post by **Kuja** » 2003-11-26 12:56am

Zaia wrote:And damn, Kuj, no one thinks you're going to end up gettin' any play. I think I might be offended at that if I were you...

*marks down the naysayers for a special 'session' with the LT in the final chapter*

Alyeska · Post by **Alyeska** » 2003-11-26 01:35am

Zaia wrote:
Aya wrote:
Zaia wrote:Doh--forgot about your little print. *contemplates* Well....ok. *grabs keys, jumps into car and drives down to VA, picking up Alyeska on the way*
Yay!
So you don't mind a threesome with Alyeska and me?

And damn, Kuj, no one thinks you're going to end up gettin' any play. I think I might be offended at that if I were you...

You do realize I'm a guy, right?

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-11-26 01:45am

Think that was the point, old chap. She was checking to make sure he didnt mind a threesome with another bloke.

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-11-26 02:55am

The_Lumberjack wrote:Think that was the point, old chap. She was checking to make sure he didnt mind a threesome with another bloke.

*dingdingding* We have a winner!

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-11-26 03:28am

I read the last thre chapters, and I'm all caught up now. ^.^ Love the Pokémon reference in Pt. 25. ^.~

~ver

Jason von Evil · Post by **Jason von Evil** » 2003-11-26 03:32am

Alyeska wrote:

You do realize I'm a guy, right?

You do realize I'm in GALE, right?

Don't you remember last years Christmas party?

Singular Quartet · Post by **Singular Quartet** » 2003-11-26 12:25pm

Kuja wrote:
Zaia wrote:And damn, Kuj, no one thinks you're going to end up gettin' any play. I think I might be offended at that if I were you...
*marks down the naysayers for a special 'session' with the LT in the final chapter*

*Name disappears form list.*

Post by **Kuja** » 2003-11-26 02:22pm

Part 28: My Favorite Ice Cream Flavor Is Troll-burning Berry

*DALTON and STRAVO dash up to CYRAN*

STRAVO: Cyran, Scooter got in somehow!

DALTON: He's wandering around drunk!

CYRAN: Yeah, I know.

DALTON: You...know?

CYRAN: Uh huh.

STRAVO: What on Earth possessed you to let him in?

CYRAN: Hey, the guy paid his cover charge just like everyone else. If he wants to call me a rabid warsie fuckwit right before handing me a ten-dollar-bill, it's his business. Now then, if you'll excuse me…

*he wanders off*

STRAVO: Warsies and Scooter…interacting…peacefully?

DALTON: Something's going on here.

*KUJA appears on the dance floor and makes his way towards CYRAN*

KUJA: Hey, everything ready?

CYRAN: You bet. *a beat* Hey, did you get a new hat?

KUJA: Uh, no.

CYRAN: Haircut?

KUJA: No...

CYRAN: There's something different about you.

KUJA: Really. Well, we can talk about it later. Gimme the mike.

*ZAIA appears at the bar next to DALTON and STRAVO*

ZAIA: Hi guys!

STRAVO: Well, you're in a good mood all of a sudden.

DALTON: Did you and Kuja finally settle things?

ZAIA: Um...twice.

STRAVO: Wha?

KUJA: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!

*silence falls*

KUJA: THANK YOU FOR ATTENDING THE LAST RAVE EVER IN NEW YORK CITY!

CROWD: YEAH!

STRAVO: Wait a sec-

KUJA: AND NOW, THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR!

*CYRAN whips off a tarp to reveal the nuke he and Kuja…purchased…earlier in the day*

KUJA: IN JUST A FEW SECONDS, ONE LUCKY RAVER IS GONNA SET THIS BABY OFF!

DALTON: We've gotta stop him!

*they start forward, but are immediately hemmed in by the crowd*

RAVER 1: Hey, quit jostling!

STRAVO: I can't move!

RAVER 2: Shut up!

KUJA: SO, WHO WANTS TO PUSH THE BUTTON?

*the crowd goes nuts*

KUJA: WELL, WE HAVE TO CHOOSE JUST ONE OF YOU, SO I HAD MY BUDDY CYRAN THROW ALL YOUR NAMES IN A HAT! LET'S SEE WHO THE LUCKY GUY OR GAL IS!

*he messes around in an upturned hat for a moment and pulls out a scrap of paper*

KUJA: AND THE WINNER IS...ROBERT SCOTT ANDERSON!

SCOOTER: WHOOHOO!

*he begins making his way towards the stage*

SCOOTER: I can't believe it! This is awesome! I've never won absolutely anything in my entire life!

*DALTON sniggers*

SCOOTER: Besides every one of my debates, of course, fuckwit!

DALTON: Yeah, of course.

SCOOTER: Concession accepted, you-

KUJA: SCOOTER, GET UP HERE!

*he scrambles up*

KUJA: CONGRATULATIONS, PAL! NOW, HIT THE SWITCH!

SCOOTER: I AM A GOLDEN GOD!

*he throws the switch. The nuke starts rumbling, then another rocket bursts out of the floor, nails him in the crotch, and carries him up into the air. Everyone watches as the rocket soars up, then explodes into a pretty fireworks display. A screaming human form engulfed in flame drops from the sky. It continues screaming until it caroms off another skyscraper, then drops silently until it lands on some power lines. Electricity sizzles and the victim starts screaming again. Finally, he falls off the lines and into a passing truck full of rock salt. The truck dumps its load, including him, onto the street. Slowly, the screaming subsides and the figure sits up*

SCOOTER: I AM INVINCIBLE!

*then he gets his head taken off by a passing pickup truck that just happens to be driven by a group of half-drunk women and stormtroopers. The crowd cheers*

KUJA: NOW, LET'S REALLY PARTY!

*the music starts up even louder. KUJA leaves the nuke and makes his way over to the others*

DALTON: You got all this cooked up just so you could kill off Scooter?

KUJA: Oh no, I'm really gonna set the nuke off.

STRAVO: What?!

KUJA: I'm kidding, I'm kidding! Yes, I really did do all this just to off Scooter.

DALTON: Well, done, then.

*STRAVO roughly drops a hand on KUJA'S shoulder*

STRAVO: Now that that's all out of the way, let's go discuss the particulars of you and Zaia being friends again.

DALTON: Yes. Let's.

KUJA: Um...is it too late to make my will out?

BOTH: Yes.

*KUJA hangs his head*

Jason von Evil · Post by **Jason von Evil** » 2003-11-26 02:29pm

Hahahaha. Wow, two chapters in about a day or two. I like!

Darth Fanboy · Post by **Darth Fanboy** » 2003-11-26 02:39pm

addendum:

still funny, heh

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-11-26 03:30pm

Oh...my god...too...much....laughing.......stomach...pain...

Captain Cyran · Post by **Captain Cyran** » 2003-11-26 04:10pm

Hehehe, good chapter Kuja. You've started cranking these things out.

DALTON: Did you and Kuja finally settle things?

ZAIA: Um...twice.

STRAVO: Wha?

[/i]

LT.Hit-Man · Post by **LT.Hit-Man** » 2003-11-26 05:01pm

Fuck me dead!

Nukes nooike a rave and one dead scooter and an up and coming torture party this fic rocks!
Keep up the good work!

2000AD · Post by **2000AD** » 2003-11-26 05:17pm

What! no setting off of the nuke! *sulks*

Apart from that it was the usual amount of good and funny!

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-11-27 02:42am

Innnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnteresting.................................

~ver

Singular Quartet · Post by **Singular Quartet** » 2003-11-27 08:50am

*blink* *blink*

YES!

Darth Yoshi · Post by **Darth Yoshi** » 2003-11-27 04:12pm

This is gonna get ugly.