VITAL STATISTICS...

[Lagmonster]

Sure. What the hell. Some people complain that the have no idea who "that Lagmonster guy" is, anyhow.

Name: (censored by the Lagmonster Ministry of Paranoia)

Do you like your name?: It's a touch common, honestly. I come from a pile of Germans and Norweigans and I get a Christian Scot's name.

Age: Old enough to be bald, not old enough for wrinkles. I was born pre-CDs and pre-Star Wars, mind.

Are you happy being this age? Yes. When you're no longer the insane side of 30 and have managed to do something useful with yourself you feel really good. Distinguished, even. Which more than makes up for the fact that Nature has taken all the moisture in your skin and hair on your head and given it to some undeserving teenager.

Sex: Masculine

If you could change genders...would you and why? Hell no. I like to have been able to appreciate women from the penis' point of view

Occupation: Research Consultant

Are you happy in your job/school? Yes. Although I can say that I'd enjoy going back to a government position, I find that I enjoy monitoring other people's work a lot more. And the only dead thing I have to prod is my lunch, and I can for once assume that it never had any fatal illnesses.

THE QUESTIONS

1) What is your self-esteem rating out of 1-10? 10. I like me.

2) Name three of your favourite TV programmes? Simpsons, Boston Public, That 70's Show (I was THERE, pal)

3) Name three of your favourite Albums? I haven't bought music for a decade. Blame the Internet, whatever. Most of what I have in album format is classical compilations anyway.

4) Name three of your favourite films? Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Roxanne

5) Describe both the physical and mental attributes of your perfect partner? My wife, Marcelle. She's smart as hell and only slightly less furious. *kidding!* *Don't beat me!*

6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why? I don't believe in any one person's ability to have that much impact, but if we could resurrect a corpse, it would be absolutely hilarious to locate the historical figure who got written about as 'Jesus' and animate him, just to see what people did.

7)What is your favourite chocolate bar? I don't like chocolate. Women may commence stoning me to death.

Man's Question - Have you ever said I love you to get a girl into bed? Yeah, once. I'm not proud of it, but I did it. Teenagers can be cruel and stupid.

9) What is your earliest memory? I remember very select things about my childhood, actually, including the crib I was in. No more than impressions mind. Helps that I have a lot of photos to help jog the memory.

10) If you could have any car...what would it be? I'm partial to the E-type Jaguar.

11) Name a high point in your life... My visit to California. I was way the hell up there in those mountains.

12) Name a low point in your life... Letting a dumbass friend go and get himself killed when I could easily have stopped him.

13) Cats or Dogs? I prefer dogs if I'm visiting, cats if I'm living there.

14) Are you superstitious...If so...what of? Nah. I used to be VERY into 'ghost hunting' as a kid (we didn't have Nintendo, what's your excuse?) and I was always a near-arrogant skeptic.

15) What is your interpretation of the meaning of life? Life's meaning is basically something we infer for ourselves based on what we end up doing with it.

THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO ANSWER THIS QUESTIONAIRE

[fgalkin]

Name: [censored]
Do you like your name?
Yup.

Age: 18

Are you happy being this age?
I'd rather be 21.

Sex:
Male

If you could change genders...would you and why?
Only if I could change back.

Occupation:
College student

Are you happy in your job/school?
I want to transfer out. Does that answer your question?

THE QUESTIONS

1) What is your self-esteem rating out of 1-10?
Abiut 7

2) Name three of your favourite TV programmes?
I don't watch TV excpet for the news and the Weather Channel.

3) Name three of your favourite Albums?
Кино- История Этого Мира
ДДТ- Просвистела
Blind Guardian- Nightfall in Middle Earth

4) Name three of your favourite films?
Pulp Fiction, Брат 2, The Matrix

5) Describe both the physical and mental attributes of your perfect partner?
Perfection is vastly overrated.

6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why?
Jesus. So I could watch all the fundies running around screaming about the Second Coming

7)What is your favourite chocolate bar?
Mars or Snickers

Mans Question - Have you ever said I love you to get a girl into bed?
No.


9) What is your earliest memory?
The following conversation(translated from Russian, of course):
Me: Did you buy me a record (vinyl was still in use in the USSR in the 80s)
Dad: no
Me: Where were you, then?
Dad: at work
Me: Aah, Earning money. Good, now buy me that record"
I was about 3 at the time


10) If you could have any car...what would it be?
A BMW Z4 roadster

11) Name a high point in your life...
Going to a Summer program at Yale. That was fun.

12) Name a low point in your life...
My two last years in Russia

13) Cats or Dogs?
Cats. Definately cats.

14) Are you superstitious...If so...what of?
I used to be, but not anymore.

15) What is your interpretation of the meaning of life?
Life has no meaning

THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO ANSWER THIS QUESTIONAIRE

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

[Zaia]

6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why?
Jesus. So I could watch all the fundies running around screaming about the Second Coming

And more amusingly, their reaction when someone explained that you were the one who brought him back.

[haas mark]

...Uhm, out of curiosity, what would make you think anyone would intentionally "slap you in the face" with music..?

~ver

Thanks for asking that, ver. I was rather curious myself.

-nods- Understandably so.

~ver

[Enigma]

If you could change genders...would you and why? No, I am male. Being female would involve an entirely different set of hormones, and periods. Ugh.

As opposed to the periods you have now?

[Nova Andromeda]

--What the hell I'll do this too....

Name:
Nova Andromeda

Do you like your name?
Of course, I chose it.
Age:
27, IIRC
Are you happy being this age?
It's not the age so much as the mileage.
Sex:
I wouldn't try to guess it based on my name if I were you...
If you could change genders...would you and why?
I might try it out for a day or two just for the hell of it. OH, you mean permenantly! Forget that....
Occupation:
Grad. Student
Are you happy in your job/school?
Sure. Paper to be published in Feb.


THE QUESTIONS

1) What is your self-esteem rating out of 1-10?
Aside from wanting a memory upgrade, new harddrive, UV proof skin, various other upgrades, and the manual to human socializing? I guess about 9 (with respect to everyone else on this rock).
2) Name three of your favourite TV programmes?
B5, Inuyasha, Robotech
3) Name three of your favourite Albums?
Metallica (the old stuff), Enigma, the BGC soundtrack
4) Name three of your favourite films?
Dune (the original), Star Wars (ANH), Ever After
5) Describe both the physical and mental attributes of your perfect partner?
Perfect huh? That is a tall order. How about some generalizations instead: Their goals would match mine, they would be physically fit, and they would be at least as smart as myself.
6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why?
Ignoring the good of society: Brina Shackelford (search the web to know why). For the good of society: Abraham Lincoln (Too take back the U.S. presidency.)
7)What is your favourite chocolate bar?
Smyphony
Womens Question - Does size matter?
Too big or too small isn't any good.
Mans Question - Have you ever said I love you to get a girl into bed?
No, and who does that work on anyhow? (What? I'm qualified to answer both questions.)
9) What is your earliest memory?
Uncertain, there are several which could be my earliest.
10) If you could have any car...what would it be?
How about a M1A1?
11) Name a high point in your life...
The end of high school.
12) Name a low point in your life...
The death of my cat when I was a kid.
13) Cats or Dogs?
Depends on whether I want a god to worship or a slave to order around.
14) Are you superstitious...If so...what of?
Only when working in lab ... the stars must be aligned properly for things to work
15) What is your interpretation of the meaning of life?
There is no "meaning of life."

[Nova Andromeda]

7)What is your favourite chocolate bar? Cadbury's Old Jamaica (combines chocolate & rum, two of my favourite things)

--Ummmm that sounds good. I think it's time for dinner too....
-BTW, welcome aboard....

[The Cleric]

Name:
Andrew
Do you like your name?
I guess
Age:
17
Are you happy being this age?
wish i was 21...
Sex:
Yes please. and male
If you could change genders...would you and why?
maybe, if i could change back if i didn't like it. fucking would be fine, but the whole PMS and menopause would be a big drawback
Occupation:
HS student
Are you happy in your job/school?
HELL NO. i can't wait for college
THE QUESTIONS

1) What is your self-esteem rating out of 1-10?
i'll be honest and give myself a 1.5
2) Name three of your favourite TV programmes?
The Man Show
Monday Night Football
The Daily Show
3) Name three of your favourite Albums?
Metallica: The Black Album
Metallica: Ride the Lightning
Iron Maiden: Brave New World
4) Name three of your favourite films?
Fight Club
The Matrix
Scarface
5) Describe both the physical and mental attributes of your perfect partner?
if you mean life partner, then slim, intelligent, nice face (not in that order). atheletic, sense of humor. someone that can handle my occassional fits of barely contained rage.
6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why?
Clif Burton. 'nuff said
7)What is your favourite chocolate bar?
Toblerone
Womens Question - Does size matter?
Mans Question - Have you ever said I love you to get a girl into bed?
no, but i would under the right circumstances
9) What is your earliest memory?
my parents wedding (natural mom, step dad)
10) If you could have any car...what would it be?
cadillac 16, so i could sell it and buy a hummer. the original one, not the shit H2
11) Name a high point in your life...
various wins in sports (track and cross country)
12) Name a low point in your life...
which one? there are so many. homecoming this past year sucked real bad.
13) Cats or Dogs?
cats. older ones are better. much less maintenence
14) Are you superstitious...If so...what of?
i'm irish
15) What is your interpretation of the meaning of life?
i would say 42, but that's been taken. i could say "worship god" as a good christian, but i'm a little pissed off at god right now. so i would say that the meaning of life is the acquisition of power, in all it's various forms.
THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO ANSWER THIS QUESTIONAIRE

and yes, i could have fixed the bold tags, but i'm too damn lazy.

[Dorsk 81]

6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why?
Jesus. So I could watch all the fundies running around screaming about the Second Coming

And more amusingly, their reaction when someone explained that you were the one who brought him back.

damn.. im changing my answer to his..

tsk tsk, what are you gunna do when you have to specify which one? *Loves the multiple Jesus theory*

[fgalkin]

6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why?
Jesus. So I could watch all the fundies running around screaming about the Second Coming

And more amusingly, their reaction when someone explained that you were the one who brought him back.

*replaces Ivanova as God's Right Hand*

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

[His Divine Shadow]

Name:
Dennis

Do you like your name?
It's ok I spose

Age: 22

Are you happy being this age?
I'm getting too old, I wish I was 20 or 19 instead.

Sex:
Male

If you could change genders...would you and why?
Don't think so.

Occupation: Sysadmin, web development, shit like that.


Are you happy in your job/school?
Eh, it's a living, barely.

THE QUESTIONS

1) What is your self-esteem rating out of 1-10?
5-6

2) Name three of your favourite TV programmes?
SG-1, it's pretty much the only show I bother to follow.

3) Name three of your favourite Albums?
I don't buy albums, the music industry can suck my cock.

4) Name three of your favourite films?
I dunno, I have trouble choosing what I like best, alot of films have good and bad qualities.

5) Describe both the physical and mental attributes of your perfect partner?
Don't have a clue, you could be with someone you utterly disagree with and it'd work fine, and it might not work at all with someone whom you agree with everything on and vice versa.
I'm randomly experimenting my way ahead.

6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why?
I dunno, God perhaps?

7)What is your favourite chocolate bar?
Dunno, don't care, I don't think I ever dignifed such an unimportant thing with even a few seconds of thought, don't think I will either.

Mans Question - Have you ever said I love you to get a girl into bed?
Nope.

9) What is your earliest memory?
Sitting in a car, I must have been 3 or so at the time, I think we were going shopping.

10) If you could have any car...what would it be?
3rd. gen Corvette maybe, or a Camaro(78-79ish)

11) Name a high point in your life...
Don't have a clue.

12) Name a low point in your life...
Again, not a clue, it's all even with small bumps here and there.

13) Cats or Dogs?
Both work well, though I prefer cats since they're low maintenance.
And they smell better.

14) Are you superstitious...If so...what of?
Nah.

15) What is your interpretation of the meaning of life?
Don't give a shit about things like that.

[His Divine Shadow]

Ayup. Dalton is a great surname. Short, simple and Irish

I'm always reminded of the Dalton Brothers from the Lucky Luke comics(a western series, the Dalton brothers where a gang of outlaws, existed for real too, extremely funny guys).

[Darth Fanboy]

Name: Dale Allen Frink

Do you like your name? Inherently no, but I wouldnt change it due to all the name related memories I have throughout the years, because no one else will ever be "The Frinkster"

Age: 21

Are you happy being this age? Most definitely

Sex: Yes Please! and by that I mean Heterosexual Male.

If you could change genders...would you and why? No, bleeding is scary

Occupation: Lab Tech at Saddleback Community College, most of my work is animal care

Are you happy in your job/school? Its as good as it can get at this point.

THE QUESTIONS

1) What is your self-esteem rating out of 1-10? Pi

2) Name three of your favourite TV programmes? Family Guy, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, and Iron Chef

3) Name three of your favourite Albums? Less than Jake, Border and Boundaries, anything by Reel Big Fish, and Echoes by Pink Floyd

4) Name three of your favourite films? Star Wars Trilogies, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Army of Darkness

5) Describe both the physical and mental attributes of your perfect partner? Heidi Klum

6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why? John Lennon, I would love to (illegal activity deleted) with him

7)What is your favourite chocolate bar? Twix with Caramel

Womens Question - Does size matter?
Mans Question - Have you ever said I love you to get a girl into bed? I never had to, but I would. I guess this deerves an explanation, its because physical ovemaking is so infrequent throughout my life i'd probably mean it.

9) What is your earliest memory? Plotting your death.

10) If you could have any car...what would it be? The Batmobile, or maybe Ecto-1

11) Name a high point in your life... New years 2002

12) Name a low point in your life... Every other day

13) Cats or Dogs? Cats

14) Are you superstitious...If so...what of? Superstitious with regards to Baseball, most people fail to recognize the ludicrous amount of weird unexplained phenomena ascribed to that game.

15) What is your interpretation of the meaning of life? it sucks, deal with it.

[RedImperator]

Name: Joe. You're not going to hear my last name, because it rhymes with part of the male reproductive system if pronounced incorrectly.

Wenis? Besticle? Wait, I've got it--Medididimus! Tell me if I'm close here.

Now for me...

Name: Matt

Do you like your name? Eh, I think I'd have prefered John.

Age: 22

Are you happy being this age? 22 is good. If only my motherfucking car insurance wasn't so high.

Sex: Male

If you could change genders...would you and why? Temporarily, sure, I'd give it a whirl. Permanant would be too complicated.

Occupation: Substitute teacher and sales associate at Frank's Nursery and Crafts

Are you happy in your job/school? I'd piss on my boss's shoes if I thought it would only get me fired and not arrested.

THE QUESTIONS

1) What is your self-esteem rating out of 1-10? 6. If I got laid more often, it'd be a 9.

2) Name three of your favourite TV programmes? Simpsons, Law and Order, That 70's Show (I'd fuck Laura Prepon six ways to Sunday)

3) Name three of your favourite Albums? Smash (The Offspring) and...and, well, I'm almost completely indifferent to music. A song will catch my attention every now and then, but I haven't bought an album in years and I've got at most 30 MP3s.

4) Name three of your favourite films? Pulp Fiction, Donnie Darko, War of the Worlds

5) Describe both the physical and mental attributes of your perfect partner? Dark eyed brunette with big tits who can hold up her end of a conversation and puts up with my crackpot ideas. Athiesm a big plus.

6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why? Benjamin Franklin

7)What is your favourite chocolate bar? Krackel

Womens Question - Does size matter?
Mans Question - Have you ever said I love you to get a girl into bed? No.

9) What is your earliest memory? Falling off my tricycle in my grandmother's driveway. I was maybe 3 at the time.

10) If you could have any car...what would it be? Maroon and cream 1956 Packard Carribbean convertable.

11) Name a high point in your life. The first few months of my last long-term relationship.

12) Name a low point in your life. The Dear John letter I recieved at the end of that relationship

13) Cats or Dogs? Cats require less work, but I'm warming up to dogs.

14) Are you superstitious...If so...what of? I stopped playing the Eagles in Madden 2003 because it was making the real Eagles lose.

15) What is your interpretation of the meaning of life? If you don't make a total clusterfuck of everything, you can call it a success.

[Dorsk 81]

Do you like your name? Inherently no, but I wouldnt change it due to all the name related memories I have throughout the years, because no one else will ever be "The Frinkster"

If you were a few years younger then it could have been Professor Frink.

[victorhadin]

Music is as a herring. It lives in a different body of water to me and I don't appreciate it being slapped in my face.

...Uhm, out of curiosity, what would make you think anyone would intentionally "slap you in the face" with music..?

~ver

Whenever I'm with a few mates and they decide to have a 'music & talking bollocks' event at their place. If talking bollocks is required, there is a pub around the corner; otherwise, can someone put the damned TV on? I despise this harmonic clamouring you call music.

Going into HMV is another one. How many times have you walked into the place, only to have a salesman run up to you, slap you forcibly round the face with a pack of CDs, yell "You've been HMV'd!!" and dash back behind the counter to look obscure?

Anyone?

... hmmm. Just me then.

[Lord Pounder]

Music is as a herring. It lives in a different body of water to me and I don't appreciate it being slapped in my face.

...Uhm, out of curiosity, what would make you think anyone would intentionally "slap you in the face" with music..?

~ver

Whenever I'm with a few mates and they decide to have a 'music & talking bollocks' event at their place. If talking bollocks is required, there is a pub around the corner; otherwise, can someone put the damned TV on? I despise this harmonic clamouring you call music.

Going into HMV is another one. How many times have you walked into the place, only to have a salesman run up to you, slap you forcibly round the face with a pack of CDs, yell "You've been HMV'd!!" and dash back behind the counter to look obscure?

Anyone?

... hmmm. Just me then.

What HMV do you go to?

[victorhadin]

The strange Monty Python HMV in backwater Dodgy-Jokesville.





Actually a couple of ones in the Manchester Arndale centre and the scarborough HMV.

[Enigma]

<snip>

Going into HMV is another one. How many times have you walked into the place, only to have a salesman run up to you, slap you forcibly round the face with a pack of CDs, yell "You've been HMV'd!!" and dash back behind the counter to look obscure?

Anyone?

... hmmm. Just me then.

If that happens again, just run up to him and knee him in the groin and yell "You been happysacked!" If its a female salesperson then just tweak her nipples and yell "HONK! HONK!"

[Singular Quartet]

Name: The Singular Quartet will do, thank you very much. I occasionally go by Dazed when name limits are only 15 characters, though.

Do you like your name? Quite contented with it.

Age: 17

Are you happy being this age? Not really, buit I'm rarely happy so it doesn't entirley matter.

Sex: Male.

If you could change genders...would you and why? This is a tough question. I probably would, mostly out of a mixture of warped curiosity. The only problem, though, is that around half of my female friends would only call me Susie....

Occupation: Student.

Are you happy in your job/school? Yes, minus the fact that I occasionally ah e to fear for my life whenever a friend of mine gets ahold of something that pertains to electricity.

THE QUESTIONS

1) What is your self-esteem rating out of 1-10? -10

2) Name three of your favourite TV programmes? Hrrm... The only shows I watch on a regular basis: West Wing... that's all I really watch on Television, actually...

3) Name three of your favourite Albums? Hrmm... REM's New Adventures in Hi-fi, Juno Reactor's Bible of Dreams, and... Moby's Play

4) Name three of your favourite films? Spirited Away, Forbidden Planet, and Godzilla 1985

5) Describe both the physical and mental attributes of your perfect partner? Can stand my presence, doesn't hate me, and can stand my natural idiocy and self-beration.

6) If you could bring one person back from the dead(Excluding family) Who would it be and why? Hitler, so I could show him how miserablely he failed, and then take a baseball bat and smash his face in.

7)What is your favourite chocolate bar? Now this is a tough question... I'd have to say...Charleston Chew

Have you ever said I love you to get a girl into bed? No, nor would I ever.

9) What is your earliest memory? My mother had a gigantic, heavy, metal drawing desk back in our old house in Pittsburgh. It was surrounded by various plants. That's all I really remember.

10) If you could have any car...what would it be? An old T-Bird.

11) Name a high point in your life... My Girlfriend[/b]

12) Name a low point in your life... The rest of it.

13) Cats or Dogs? Cats. Less mess, and they're rather warm.

14) Are you superstitious...If so...what of? Yes, I firmly beleive that I will be surrounded by idiots for the rest of my life.

15) What is your interpretation of the meaning of life? It's a number. What do you want?

THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO ANSWER THIS QUESTIONAIRE

You may or may not be welcome.

[haas mark]

Actually, no, I've never had that happen..

~ver

[The Morrigan]

7)What is your favourite chocolate bar? Cadbury's Old Jamaica (combines chocolate & rum, two of my favourite things)

--Ummmm that sounds good. I think it's time for dinner too....
-BTW, welcome aboard....

Ooh, it is. It's dark chocolate too, and has raisins in it. I have some in my fridge right now [drools]. And thanks.

[Kuja]

Ooh, it is. It's dark chocolate too, and has raisins in it. I have some in my fridge right now [drools]. And thanks.

So it's got chocolate, raisins, and rum?

Damn, I've gotta get my hands on one of these!

[Dalton]

Ayup. Dalton is a great surname. Short, simple and Irish

I'm always reminded of the Dalton Brothers from the Lucky Luke comics(a western series, the Dalton brothers where a gang of outlaws, existed for real too, extremely funny guys).

There's an off chance that I'm related to them.

[Darth Fanboy]

Ayup. Dalton is a great surname. Short, simple and Irish

I'm always reminded of the Dalton Brothers from the Lucky Luke comics(a western series, the Dalton brothers where a gang of outlaws, existed for real too, extremely funny guys).

There's an off chance that I'm related to them.

Could you imagine a couple of Daltons tearing across the Old west?

me neither...