Minutemen (We've all had our moments)

Stravo · Post by **Stravo** » 2003-12-08 11:55am

Ok fellas, time to fess up, there has been at least one time (and for some of us quite a few times) where you were pleasuring a lucky lady and suddenly Mr. Happy decides to blow his load entirely too fucking soon.

You have to deal with the lady's wrath at such an incident and your own mumbled excuses. Perhaps some of you tried to fake it when you had a rubber on and bravely attempted to continue the act after filling the contraption with your speedy seed but soon your member achieves the consistency of a wet noodle. No matter what the end result is the same you blasted your load and now you have nothing to give the lady but your sincerest apologies.

Care to share these stories?

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-12-08 12:02pm

ROFLMAO...seriously only this board do we even have this sort of discussion.

And to put no specific pariculars...once in high school with a girl I had an immense crush on since elementry and well...I chock it up to inexperience.

Chardok · Post by **Chardok** » 2003-12-08 12:25pm

I've been a minuteman since...well...a long time. Up until just recently, in fact. I fixed the problem, though I won't say how, I can tell you in involves...desensitivity "Excersises." My GF is pleased.

The most embarassing was once about two years ago, I met this FINE specimen female in a bar, went back to her place (Following my rule of "It's always easier to sneak out than it is to kick out.") and, as we got into the foreplay, my artillery went off danger-close and before the coordinates were finished being called in so to speak. That was a short night.

Alferd Packer · Post by **Alferd Packer** » 2003-12-08 01:00pm

The easiest way to get out of that is to stare into her eyes or the back of her neck and say, "TO BE CONTINUED."

Dave Attell has an answer for everything.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-12-08 03:03pm

Only once, the first time a girl had her hand on my actual cock. I didn't even notice i'd come, strange experience. Thankfuklly, never repeated.

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2003-12-08 03:05pm

Only happened the once in my company.

I took it as a compliment. is that right?

Post by **LadyTevar** » 2003-12-08 03:25pm

InnerBrat wrote:Only happened the once in my company.

I took it as a compliment. is that right?

The fact that you've made them lose all control of themselves?

Yeah, I'd call it a compliment, as well as tease them for months about it.

Stravo · Post by **Stravo** » 2003-12-08 03:35pm

LadyTevar wrote:
InnerBrat wrote:Only happened the once in my company.

I took it as a compliment. is that right?
The fact that you've made them lose all control of themselves?

Yeah, I'd call it a compliment, as well as tease them for months about it.

There are few things as devastating to the male ego as a woman who constantly recalls such a launch failure. To the ladies' credit it urges us to work doubly hard at making them forgteit by stringing together a series of our greatest hits.

Post by **Lagmonster** » 2003-12-08 03:37pm

It happens to the best of us, mostly in our youth.

Although as a teenager, I went through a period where I suffered from the opposite problem: I just couldn't finish. And before anyone starts talking about how wonderful it would be to fuck for a couple of hours, it's not. It gets tiring and sore and frustrating.

Got over it well enough. I'd guess there is such a thing as being TOO paranoid that you won't last 'long enough', and subsequently creating mental blocks to sex.

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2003-12-08 03:47pm

i was with a girl in her dorm room at URI. Her roomate was awake and watching a little tv by her bed. It was dark, so she couldn't see. i guess i was a little too into the fact that her roomate was only a couple feet away and i only lasted a minute. I got used to it, considering that her roomate would fuck her boyfriend in the dark when we were there..... and they were nowhere near as discreet as we were.

CmdrWilkens · Post by **CmdrWilkens** » 2003-12-08 03:51pm

To date it happened only once when we were scrweing in my gf's paretrn's basement and her brother was stalking around upstairs. Much like the Col. I think the possiblity of discovery over excited me and i was done before I knew it. However I made sure that afterwards 9as well as before) i rode that cooch like a mother so she was only too happy with the string of Big Os I bookended my failure with. In other words she forgot and wanted more the next day...I was happy.

Stravo · Post by **Stravo** » 2003-12-08 03:53pm

CmdrWilkens wrote:To date it happened only once when we were scrweing in my gf's paretrn's basement and her brother was stalking around upstairs. Much like the Col. I think the possiblity of discovery over excited me and i was done before I knew it. However I made sure that afterwards 9as well as before) i rode that cooch like a mother so she was only too happy with the string of Big Os I bookended my failure with. In other words she forgot and wanted more the next day...I was happy.

God there's nothing like those quick sweaty rabbit fucks in some tucked away corner where discovery can happen at any moment.

CmdrWilkens · Post by **CmdrWilkens** » 2003-12-08 03:58pm

Stravo wrote:
CmdrWilkens wrote:To date it happened only once when we were scrweing in my gf's paretrn's basement and her brother was stalking around upstairs. Much like the Col. I think the possiblity of discovery over excited me and i was done before I knew it. However I made sure that afterwards 9as well as before) i rode that cooch like a mother so she was only too happy with the string of Big Os I bookended my failure with. In other words she forgot and wanted more the next day...I was happy.
God there's nothing like those quick sweaty rabbit fucks in some tucked away corner where discovery can happen at any moment.

I just love the college dorm study lounge around finals time. You know somebody is gonna want to use it and when you are both sleeping in there you can't run away. No experience with that or anything.

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2003-12-08 04:07pm

My first time with my current GF. I barely had time to get it in her before it went off, but in my defence I hadn't been laid in over 4 months and she is one sexy babe. She just shook her head and teased me about it and we went back to cuddling and fondling before trying again half an hour later. That went a lot better.

salm · Post by **salm** » 2003-12-08 08:05pm

well, if you´ve had long sexless time, comming early is not that unusual.

Stravo · Post by **Stravo** » 2003-12-08 08:06pm

salm wrote:well, if you´ve had long sexless time, comming early is not that unusual.

Also if the lady in question is particularly tight in her nether regions thats always a roadblock for me to make it last.

Anarchist Bunny · Post by **Anarchist Bunny** » 2003-12-08 08:17pm

Seeing how I'm a complete virgin(I don't want to start talking about all the stuff I haven't done), no, but a friend of mine prides herself in being able to suck any guy off in 60 seconds, and says she may one day prove it to me.

Defiant · Post by **Defiant** » 2003-12-08 08:17pm

Its been my experience that if you help her have the big O (or several depending on your technique and patience) before the actual sex, shooting off early isn't that big of a deal.

Of course, if she hits the O and you manage not to, she'll look at you as less of a man and more of a god-like figure.

Illuminatus Primus · Post by **Illuminatus Primus** » 2003-12-08 08:30pm

Uhm, I don't know if anyone will believe me or think I'm some sort of freak...

I've never been able to cum with a girl in under twenty minutes (well maybe once there was fifteen, but I don't exactly look at my watch constantly). A half-hour to forty-five minutes was commonplace, and the first bunch of times, I didn't cum at all.

I've only cum once from head. That was twenty-five minutes. It takes me forty-five minutes to whack off without porno, and twenty at least with.

I hate this. But Ashley didn't exactly really mind and was none too enthusiastic about helping me.

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2003-12-08 08:54pm

anarchistbunny wrote:Seeing how I'm a complete virgin(I don't want to start talking about all the stuff I haven't done), no, but a friend of mine prides herself in being able to suck any guy off in 60 seconds, and says she may one day prove it to me.

Say, can you introduce me to this friend of yours?

victorhadin · Post by **victorhadin** » 2003-12-08 08:58pm

Lagmonster wrote:It happens to the best of us, mostly in our youth.

Although as a teenager, I went through a period where I suffered from the opposite problem: I just couldn't finish. And before anyone starts talking about how wonderful it would be to fuck for a couple of hours, it's not. It gets tiring and sore and frustrating.

Got over it well enough. I'd guess there is such a thing as being TOO paranoid that you won't last 'long enough', and subsequently creating mental blocks to sex.

^
What this chap said. Perfectly true.

And the irritating thing is that when reading the title of the thread I automatically thought of the two/ three stage rapid-reponse ICBMs. There is a point when your interest becomes your job becomes your obession, and....

Shitfire. I'd have another drink, save for my already exuberant consumption thus far.

Sorry. Where was I?

Illuminatus Primus · Post by **Illuminatus Primus** » 2003-12-08 09:01pm

anarchistbunny wrote:Seeing how I'm a complete virgin(I don't want to start talking about all the stuff I haven't done), no, but a friend of mine prides herself in being able to suck any guy off in 60 seconds, and says she may one day prove it to me.

Dude, I need this. You don't understand...

victorhadin · Post by **victorhadin** » 2003-12-08 09:01pm

Defiant wrote:Its been my experience that if you help her have the big O (or several depending on your technique and patience) before the actual sex, shooting off early isn't that big of a deal.

Not always a possibility, alas. With some, yes. With others, no. Decide subjectively instead of becoming set upon this, of course.

Stravo · Post by **Stravo** » 2003-12-08 09:07pm

Illuminatus Primus wrote:
anarchistbunny wrote:Seeing how I'm a complete virgin(I don't want to start talking about all the stuff I haven't done), no, but a friend of mine prides herself in being able to suck any guy off in 60 seconds, and says she may one day prove it to me.
Dude, I need this. You don't understand...

IP I had the same problem when I was younger, girls would blow me till they got lockjaw and nothing, nada, it was a real pain in the ass. It was only until I found a woman who was more sexual to me (That was a find) and she would just get me all hot and bothered THEN go down on me, and she added sound effects to her action (If you know what I mean think loud slurping mixed with muffled moans) and this eventually broke down what ever the fuck was blocking me and now I have no problems orally.

Illuminatus Primus · Post by **Illuminatus Primus** » 2003-12-08 09:22pm

Well I'd like a little quickening with ol' fashioned vaginal too y'know. :sigh: Eventually I suppose.