50 Reasons why LOTR sucked

Alex Moon · Post by **Alex Moon** » 2003-12-27 01:05pm

The Yosemite Bear wrote:Yo Moon you could have warned us that the place was a Pop up hell....

Sorry about that. I only get one pop up so I didn't think too much about it.

Drooling Iguana · Post by **Drooling Iguana** » 2003-12-27 02:46pm

Alex Moon wrote:
The Yosemite Bear wrote:Yo Moon you could have warned us that the place was a Pop up hell....
Sorry about that. I only get one pop up so I didn't think too much about it.

Pop-ups? What are these pop-ups you speak of?

Laundreu · Post by **Laundreu** » 2003-12-27 08:56pm

Drooling Iguana wrote:They should have had Bruce Campbell play Gandalf. That would've kicked ass.

Which leads us to the mental image of Gandalf blocking the path of the Balrog by brandishing his staff and bellowing, 'THIS IS MY BOOMSTICK!'

Demiurge · Post by **Demiurge** » 2003-12-27 11:02pm

This man is a comic genius.

This is what he had to say about Eminem's movie "8 Mile".

Speaking of 8 Mile, the final scene had the audience I watched it with howling with laughter. There is almost no way to disarm a nuclear device using only rap.

Captain Cyran · Post by **Captain Cyran** » 2003-12-27 11:27pm

Iceberg wrote:
2000AD wrote:He missed another:

Strange facial hair:
Throughout all three movies Aragorn's Stubble remained the same, but as soon as he becomes king he gets a bushy beard!
Day Six:
Orcs killed: none. Disappointing. Stubble update: I look rugged and manly. Yes!
Keep wanting to drop-kick Gimli. Holding myself back.
Still not King.

What's the Sauron one again?

"Took away the orcs disco ball, God I love being evil."

And Gandalf was something along the lines of "If Legolas keeps prancing about atop the snow I'm gonna kill him."

Someone send me a link, been way to long since I've read those.

Johonebesus · Post by **Johonebesus** » 2003-12-28 04:03am

Captain_Cyran wrote: Someone send me a link, been way to long since I've read those.

The Originals

New ones

Darth Gojira · Post by **Darth Gojira** » 2003-12-28 02:36pm

Iceberg wrote:
2000AD wrote:He missed another:

Strange facial hair:
Throughout all three movies Aragorn's Stubble remained the same, but as soon as he becomes king he gets a bushy beard!
Day Six:
Orcs killed: none. Disappointing. Stubble update: I look rugged and manly. Yes!
Keep wanting to drop-kick Gimli. Holding myself back.
Still not King.

Favorite diary excerpts(sp?): "Well, Saruman the White does not stand for this treatment. Showed him my Wizard Wrestling Federation moves. Have delivered smackdown. Go me".
also: "Aragorn obviously into Frodo. Sam will kill him if he tries anything."

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-12-29 04:26am

That's funny shit. However, like just about everything, I wouldn't be surprised if there were people ignorant enough the actually think that.

The Cleric · Post by **The Cleric** » 2003-12-29 04:54am

Everyone commented on Sam willing to kill people for making a move at Frodo. I thought that was very funny.

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-12-30 07:35pm

I don't eat carrots anymore.

Crazedwraith · Post by **Crazedwraith** » 2003-12-31 08:30am

cool list. My favourite has to be:
Homage or theft X?
The character of Elrond was based on Agent Smith from The Matrix.

Read the secret diaries, speciaclly liked Faramirs.

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-12-31 10:39am

Best was Arragorns.

Still not King yet.

Dartzap · Post by **Dartzap** » 2003-12-31 10:58am

yes, the "not King yet" was quite funny, but i think legolas was quite funny as well

Demiurge · Post by **Demiurge** » 2003-12-31 11:13am

Crazedwraith wrote: cool list. My favourite has to be:
Homage or theft X?
The character of Elrond was based on Agent Smith from The Matrix.

That was my least favorite. Everyone has done that joke, and I never found it funny to begin with.

Lt. Dan · Post by **Lt. Dan** » 2003-12-31 03:53pm

The one Gandalf is willing to hit the prancing elf was damn funny.

Drooling Iguana · Post by **Drooling Iguana** » 2003-12-31 08:24pm

Laundreu wrote:
Drooling Iguana wrote:They should have had Bruce Campbell play Gandalf. That would've kicked ass.
Which leads us to the mental image of Gandalf blocking the path of the Balrog by brandishing his staff and bellowing, 'THIS IS MY BOOMSTICK!'

Good? Bad? I'm the guy with the staff.

Trogdor · Post by **Trogdor** » 2003-12-31 08:53pm

Funny shit, but he missed pointing out that towards the end of Fellowship, when Aragon is running across the battle field to the pin cushion that is Borimir, a "dead" orc can be seen to look up. #8, Gold: the stretchy element, is wrong, though. At some point in one of the flashbacks the ring is seen magically shrinking to fit its new owner.