Lord Pounder wrote:Fishing on the Sega Saturn copped it for me. Or any of the horrible athletics games on my old C46 that caused me to kill so many joysticks.
lol Remember that Olympics game? I must've worn out atleast 4 joysticks from that game alone.
"I once asked Rebecca to sing Happy Birthday to me during sex. That was funny, especially since I timed my thrusts to sync up with the words. And yes, it was my birthday." - Darth Wong
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Aya wrote:IGN has a review of a game that didn't even get a 1.0 rating.
Extreme Paintbrawl, I think it is.
Didn't just about every game in that "Extreme" series get a really bad rating from being rushed and glitchy?
What I'd like to do for kicks is design the worst game ever on purpose. Make the grahpics blocky, pixellated, and outdated, the music annoying and repetitive, the sound effects obnoxious and out of place, the AI clumsy, innacurate, and prone to getting stuck in walls and corners, clipping everywhere, hit detection poor, controls unresponsive and awkward, and then give it a flashy box. Basically, take the worst parts of just about every bad game ever made, and combine it into one package.
'After 9/11, it was "You're with us or your with the terrorists." Now its "You're with Straha or you support racism."' ' - The Romulan Republic
'You're a bully putting on an air of civility while saying that everything western and/or capitalistic must be bad, and a lot of other posters (loomer, Stas Bush, Gandalf) are also going along with it for their own personal reasons (Stas in particular is looking through rose colored glasses)' - Darth Yan
JediNeophyte wrote:I'm pretty sure Swamp Buggy Racing is the worst ever.
The producer of that game worked on Wing Commander. I talked to him about it once, he said thatthe game was made in like four weeks.
"The publisher got what they paid for".
(Regarding eXTREME pAINTBRAWL, that was made in even less time - a week and a half, I think)
Last edited by Bob McDob on 2004-01-21 11:16am, edited 1 time in total.
That's the wrong way to tickle Mary, that's the wrong way to kiss!
Don't you know that, over here lad, they like it best like this!
Hooray, pour les français! Farewell, Angleterre!
We didn't know how to tickle Mary, but we learnt how, over there!
How could you forget FATAL: Fantasy Adventures To Adult Lechery!?
"Carriers dispense fighters, which dispense assbeatings." - White Haven
| Hyperactive Gundam Pilot of MM | GALE | ASVS | Cleaners | Kibologist (beable) | DFB |
If only one rock and roll song echoes into tomorrow
There won't be anything to keep you from the distant morning glow.
I'm not a man. I just portrayed one for 15 years.
Iceberg wrote:How could you forget FATAL: Fantasy Adventures To Adult Lechery!?
Because that's not a computer game.
Do not meddle in the affairs of insomniacs, for they are cranky and can do things to you while you sleep. The Realm of Confusion
"Every time you talk about Teal'c, I keep imagining Thor's ass. Thank you very much for that, you fucking fucker." -Marcao SG-14: Because in some cases, "Recon" means "Blow up a fucking planet or die trying." SilCore Wiki! Come take a look!
Does the thread title SAY "computer game" or "video game?"
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
"Carriers dispense fighters, which dispense assbeatings." - White Haven
| Hyperactive Gundam Pilot of MM | GALE | ASVS | Cleaners | Kibologist (beable) | DFB |
If only one rock and roll song echoes into tomorrow
There won't be anything to keep you from the distant morning glow.
I'm not a man. I just portrayed one for 15 years.
Iceberg wrote:Does the thread title SAY "computer game" or "video game?"
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
No, but note that all the games listed so far are computer games, and the complaints largely involve shitty programming, and I would make the same objection if you brought up Daikatana in a thread where everyone is talking about shitty tabletap roleplaying games. The fact is you're berating people (in good humor, I presume of course) for not mentioning a game that is not of the same type as is mentioned in the opening post.
Do not meddle in the affairs of insomniacs, for they are cranky and can do things to you while you sleep. The Realm of Confusion
"Every time you talk about Teal'c, I keep imagining Thor's ass. Thank you very much for that, you fucking fucker." -Marcao SG-14: Because in some cases, "Recon" means "Blow up a fucking planet or die trying." SilCore Wiki! Come take a look!
JediNeophyte wrote:I'm pretty sure Swamp Buggy Racing is the worst ever.
The producer of that game worked on Wing Commander. I talked to him about it once, he said thatthe game was made in like four weeks.
"The publisher got what they paid for".
(Regarding eXTREME pAINTBRAWL, that was made in even less time - a week and a half, I think)
How the fuck can you get ANYTHING done on a game in a week and a half?!
Do a really half-assed job, of course. It wouldn't hurt to not bother working out glitches or put a lot of levels in either. Still, a week in a half is really short.
Let's not forget Cho Aniki (SNES ROM Emu Required: I recommend ZSNES). I guarantee this game is gay enough to keep even Shep interested in it for a long time...
i recall reading in EGM's magazine that it was so utterly horrible that they wouldn't even give it a rating. and this was not even taking the homo-eroticism into consideration.
"It's you Americans. There's something about nipples you hate. If this were Germany, we'd be romping around naked on the stage here."
Byydo wrote:
Weapons: Since this is a fighting game, each character has their own range of attacks and moves. The actual control layout is pretty good, and the movement (all the characters can fly, and so can move in any direction) makes it a rather unique experience. There're a wide range of attacks and they're matched with a good, intuitive control scheme. However, most of the good points about the gameplay mechanics are balanced out by the fact that THE GAME IS FULL OF NAKED MEN. ALL THE MOVES INVOLVE SOME DEGREE OF IMPLIED SODOMY. Super Mario Brothers was a good game, but if they replaced Mario with a muscleman in a speedo who "grew larger" when he touched "a mushroom", NOBODY, ANYWHERE, WOULD EVER, EVER PLAY THE GAME, EXCEPT MAYBE FRAGMASTER.
Enemies: Since this is a gay sex fighting game, the player characters and the enemies are all the same. There are 8 characters, each with his or her own style, technique, and HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE SEXUAL INNUENDO. The characters include a lithe, loinclothed muscleman, a tight-pants kung fu guy, a woman who controls the ugliest pair of cherubs in existence, an Elvis robot, and a cute girl who seems to have had her lower body and the top of her head ripped off, with the remaining parts being surgically bolted to a tiny flying steamship which is crewed by three tiny, naked men. Further objections to good taste include a nude man in a flying bathtub, THE MOTHERFUCKING GOD OF WAR, and a strange blue thing which appears to be made out of latex. I have no idea what that blue thing is, but I'll probably be seeing it a lot in my forthcoming nightmares.
That's the wrong way to tickle Mary, that's the wrong way to kiss!
Don't you know that, over here lad, they like it best like this!
Hooray, pour les français! Farewell, Angleterre!
We didn't know how to tickle Mary, but we learnt how, over there!
I only wish I had some of my older PC Gamers with me. The highlight of that magazine was going to the games being reviewed with scores beloe 10%, the review was always a fantastic piss take. One game, that French one like Homeworld, even got a "N/A" rating because they couldn't understand it enough to install and review.
Actually... I recall that the Mortal Kombat game for the GBA got a 0.0 score from EGM.
Mayabird is my girlfriend
Justice League:BotM:MM:SDnet City Watch:Cybertron's Finest "Well then, science is bullshit. "
-revprez, with yet another brilliant rebuttal.
Tribun wrote:"Zero Wing" All your base are belong to us.
From what I've read, Zero Wing wasn't actually as bad as it's home version intro video makes it out to be. It was pretty much just an average sidescroller shooter.
I believe in a sign of Zeta.
[BOTM|WG|JL|Mecha Maniacs|Pax Cybertronia|Veteran of the Psychic Wars|Eva Expert]
"And besides, who cares if a monster destroys Australia?"
i've played zero wing before. the gameplay actually isn't that bad, although it's a bit on the difficult side. the only thing that really makes it stand out is the shitty dialogue translation.
"It's you Americans. There's something about nipples you hate. If this were Germany, we'd be romping around naked on the stage here."
