Bill Maher on Southern Democrats and voting.

Tsyroc · Post by **Tsyroc** » 2004-02-08 01:25pm

Bill Maher on Salon.com wrote: Lose the twang, y'all
Enough with the Civil War complex: It's time for Southern Democrats to get enlightened about voting Bush out of office.

Editor's note: HBO's "Real Time With Bill Maher" airs Friday nights at 11 p.m. EST and is repeated throughout the week. This is adapted from the "New Rules" segment of the show.

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By Bill Maher

Feb. 7, 2004 | New rule: Southerners have to at least consider voting for candidates from the North.

North Carolina Sen. John Edwards has a powerful argument in his bid to be the Democratic nominee when he says, "What I give people is a candidate who can win everywhere in America."

Translation: "We Southerners ain't gonna vote for no Yankee! You suckers up North will take our Clintons and Carters, but we just ain't buyin' Kerrys and Deans."

And that's a shame. Not just for Democrats but for democracy itself. And I feel bad for the millions of intelligent people who live in a region still dominated by so much prejudice that anyone who wants to be president better have a twang in his voice and pronounce all four E's in the word "shit."

Sorry, but responding only to people who look and sound like you is small-minded, so if Southerners don't want to have an inferiority complex, I say, "Stop doing things that make reasonable people think you're inferior!"

Like, getting rid of slavery was a good start. But don't quit there: Stop being the place that's always challenging the theory of evolution. What's next, gravity? Is that just a plot by the Jews up North to get people to drop spare change?

Southerners need to let go of the Civil War, beginning with those reenactments. First of all, you're reenacting something you lost. It's one thing to gloat about victory -- when you do it about losing, your front porch is a few couches short of being decorated.

The time has come to move on. The time has come to consider voting for a Yankee. Howard Dean's Vermont is no longer where carpetbaggers come from. Carpet munchers -- yes.

There's no good reason that America, at this late date, still needs to be a house divided. At bottom, we all want the same things: dignity, security -- and someone to slap the shit out of Janet Jackson.

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About the writer
Bill Maher is the host of HBO's "Real Time With Bill Maher."

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2004-02-08 01:48pm

Of course, let's just bash the fucking South and ignore the fact that the last time Southerners didn't want to vote for a Northern liberal, neither did the folks in western states, the entire sunbelt, and even several northern states.

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2004-02-08 02:43pm

Gravity being a Jewish conspiracy was hilarious.

Tsyroc · Post by **Tsyroc** » 2004-02-08 02:45pm

I thought it was funny. Maybe not entirely accurate but amusing anyway.

I also wasn't aware that "the South" was the only one who did Civil War reenacments.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2004-02-08 03:00pm

There's no good reason that America, at this late date, still needs to be a house divided. At bottom, we all want the same things: dignity, security -- and someone to slap the shit out of Janet Jackson.

I'm getting sick and tired of this "divided America" bullshit. Can anyone please provide for me a point in our history since the Civil War when we were not divided?

BlkbrryTheGreat · Post by **BlkbrryTheGreat** » 2004-02-08 03:35pm

Joe wrote:
There's no good reason that America, at this late date, still needs to be a house divided. At bottom, we all want the same things: dignity, security -- and someone to slap the shit out of Janet Jackson.
I'm getting sick and tired of this "divided America" bullshit. Can anyone please provide for me a point in our history since the Civil War when we were not divided?

Or before it for that matter.......

CelesKnight · Post by **CelesKnight** » 2004-02-08 03:38pm

The article is funny, but it's no more relevent or accurate than saying "Northerns keep doing dumb things because the cold weather froze their brains." I'm not from the South, but come on, no one can't seriously think that the their voting on the basis of accent.

Glocksman · Post by **Glocksman** » 2004-02-08 04:04pm

The last northern liberal to run for President won 111 electoral votes.
His opponent had 426 electoral votes.

Obviously, Dukakis lost a lot more than just the south.

What's happening is that people like Bill Maher just can't wrap their brains around the fact that northern liberals lose because they're liberals, not northerners.

Hint: The rest of the country doesn't necessarily share the political views (thank God) of the Boston-D.C. corridor.

Tsyroc · Post by **Tsyroc** » 2004-02-08 04:17pm

Glocksman wrote:The last northern liberal to run for President won 111 electoral votes.
His opponent had 426 electoral votes.

Obviously, Dukakis lost a lot more than just the south.

What's happening is that people like Bill Maher just can't wrap their brains around the fact that northern liberals lose because they're liberals, not northerners.

Hint: The rest of the country doesn't necessarily share the political views (thank God) of the Boston-D.C. corridor.

Don't forget Minnesota. IIRC Mondale was from there and he got creamed too.

Glocksman · Post by **Glocksman** » 2004-02-08 04:20pm

At least Mondale did the one thing that Al Gore couldn't.

He won his home state.

Glocksman · Post by **Glocksman** » 2004-02-08 04:24pm

On a related note, I'd love to see Bush lose, but not to John Kerry.

I was going to vote for Howard Dean in the general election, but now I guess I'm going to vote 3rd party or sit out the Presidential race.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2004-02-08 05:52pm

Also, does Maher think the best way to get Southern Democrats to vote for northern liberals is to reinforce their perception of them with condescending sneer pieces such as this one?

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2004-02-08 08:19pm

Glocksman wrote:At least Mondale did the one thing that Al Gore couldn't.

He won his home state.

yes that is what mondale won. His home state of Minnesota. Lets review the rest of mondale's state victories... lets see there is Minnesota..... oh ueah , thats it! *snicker*

Glocksman · Post by **Glocksman** » 2004-02-08 08:28pm

It's even funnier about Gore.
Because if Gore had carried Tennessee, he would be President right now.

Even southern liberals lose in the south.

Glocksman · Post by **Glocksman** » 2004-02-08 08:30pm

Col. Crackpot wrote:
Glocksman wrote:At least Mondale did the one thing that Al Gore couldn't.

He won his home state.
yes that is what mondale won. His home state of Minnesota. Lets review the rest of mondale's state victories... lets see there is Minnesota..... oh ueah , thats it! *snicker*

Don't forget he also won DC.

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2004-02-08 10:40pm

Joe wrote:Also, does Maher think the best way to get Southern Democrats to vote for northern liberals is to reinforce their perception of them with condescending sneer pieces such as this one?

With him it's hard to tell. At the very least it is an attempt to sneer at those he considers more ignorant.

Post by **Vympel** » 2004-02-09 04:53am

Durandal wrote:Gravity being a Jewish conspiracy was hilarious.

One of his favorite jokes. He has a blog on his home page, it's pretty funny.

Rubberanvil · Post by **Rubberanvil** » 2004-02-09 05:50am

Glocksman wrote: I was going to vote for Howard Dean in the general election, but now I guess I'm going to vote 3rd party or sit out the Presidential race.

Vote for Donald Duck or write someone else's name on the ballot, if there no suitable 3rd party candidate to vote for.