Things NOT to Say to a Naked Man

OT: anything goes!

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Tsyroc
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Things NOT to Say to a Naked Man

Post by Tsyroc »

Things NOT to Say to a Naked Man
  • That's it?
  • Wow - look at all the hair on your back!
  • Maybe you should start going to the gym more.
  • That was fine, dear...pass me my vibrator?
  • That's a shame, maybe we should grab a video instead?
  • Wake me when it's over, ok?
  • I think the condom's too big.
  • You want me to what?!?
  • Well, that explains the padded pants.
  • My husband's in the Marines. He's due home any day now.
  • Is that a toupee?
  • No. Surgery might be able to help.
  • Not until you've showered.
  • Your brother's bigger.
  • Your best friend's better.
  • Are you done yet?
  • You might want to see a doctor about that.
  • Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!
  • Gee i didn't think it was that cold :wink:
  • Just like your father
Last edited by Tsyroc on 2004-03-03 10:46am, edited 2 times in total.
By the pricking of my thumb,
Something wicked this way comes.
Open, locks,
Whoever knocks.
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RogueIce
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Post by RogueIce »

*ponders, looking for the significant meaning behind that list*

Nope, no luck. I liked the last two though. :lol:

So, tell me, when you were in the Navy...how many of those did you hear? Or is that where you got them from? :wink: :P
Image
"How can I wait unknowing?
This is the price of war,
We rise with noble intentions,
And we risk all that is pure..." - Angela & Jeff van Dyck, Forever (Rome: Total War)

"On and on, through the years,
The war continues on..." - Angela & Jeff van Dyck, We Are All One (Medieval 2: Total War)
"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear." - Ambrose Redmoon
"You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain." - Harvey Dent, The Dark Knight
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Tsyroc
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Post by Tsyroc »

RogueIce wrote:*ponders, looking for the significant meaning behind that list*

Nope, no luck. I liked the last two though. :lol:

So, tell me, when you were in the Navy...how many of those did you hear? Or is that where you got them from? :wink: :P

I think they come from the Ensign's Guide to Promotion :D
By the pricking of my thumb,
Something wicked this way comes.
Open, locks,
Whoever knocks.
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Post by RogueIce »

Tsyroc wrote:
RogueIce wrote:*ponders, looking for the significant meaning behind that list*

Nope, no luck. I liked the last two though. :lol:

So, tell me, when you were in the Navy...how many of those did you hear? Or is that where you got them from? :wink: :P

I think they come from the Ensign's Guide to Promotion :D
"Ba-da, ching!"

Just for us brave SWOrriors of course, right? :)

*begins plotting revenge while muttering "Damn enlisted..."*
Image
"How can I wait unknowing?
This is the price of war,
We rise with noble intentions,
And we risk all that is pure..." - Angela & Jeff van Dyck, Forever (Rome: Total War)

"On and on, through the years,
The war continues on..." - Angela & Jeff van Dyck, We Are All One (Medieval 2: Total War)
"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear." - Ambrose Redmoon
"You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain." - Harvey Dent, The Dark Knight
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Post by Lord Pounder »

You forgot the classic "gee i didn't think it was that cold"
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Post by EmperorMing »

*Just like your father...*
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Post by Metrion Cascade »

RogueIce wrote:
Tsyroc wrote:
RogueIce wrote:*ponders, looking for the significant meaning behind that list*

Nope, no luck. I liked the last two though. :lol:

So, tell me, when you were in the Navy...how many of those did you hear? Or is that where you got them from? :wink: :P

I think they come from the Ensign's Guide to Promotion :D
"Ba-da, ching!"

Just for us brave SWOrriors of course, right? :)

*begins plotting revenge while muttering "Damn enlisted..."*
::enlisted go on strike and ship full of inexperienced yuppie officers sinks/blows up/kills them like the Event Horizon, because they can't operate any of the machinery without us::

::cue laughing of senior enlisted who are tired of the aforementioned yuppie officers with less experience shitting on them::
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Post by AnimeJet »

"Aww, it's so cute"
:D
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Post by Lonestar »

I walked in here, expecting to have heard some of those things already....

Remember boys and girls, the Navy gives you the Gay. Don't let anyone tell you different.

I had the misfortune of a female saying something along the lines of AnimeJet's comment once. And people ask why I have no self-confidence with women
"The rifle itself has no moral stature, since it has no will of its own. Naturally, it may be used by evil men for evil purposes, but there are more good men than evil, and while the latter cannot be persuaded to the path of righteousness by propaganda, they can certainly be corrected by good men with rifles."
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Post by RogueIce »

Lonestar wrote:I had the misfortune of a female saying something along the lines of AnimeJet's comment once. And people ask why I have no self-confidence with women
At least it never happened in the showers...did it?
Image
"How can I wait unknowing?
This is the price of war,
We rise with noble intentions,
And we risk all that is pure..." - Angela & Jeff van Dyck, Forever (Rome: Total War)

"On and on, through the years,
The war continues on..." - Angela & Jeff van Dyck, We Are All One (Medieval 2: Total War)
"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear." - Ambrose Redmoon
"You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain." - Harvey Dent, The Dark Knight
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Tsyroc
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Post by Tsyroc »

AnimeJet wrote:"Aww, it's so cute"
:D

When a guy hears that coming from a woman who is currently viewing him naked he must assume that she is refering to his ass. :)
By the pricking of my thumb,
Something wicked this way comes.
Open, locks,
Whoever knocks.
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Post by InnerBrat »

Is it in yet?
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Post by General Zod »

"You call that an erection?"
"It's you Americans. There's something about nipples you hate. If this were Germany, we'd be romping around naked on the stage here."
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Post by Tsyroc »

InnerBrat wrote:Is it in yet?
That can be taken another way in which the comment isn't too flatering for the lady involved either. :D
By the pricking of my thumb,
Something wicked this way comes.
Open, locks,
Whoever knocks.
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Post by Faram »

InnerBrat wrote:Is it in yet?
LOL

If I heard that suicide would be a step up...

Talk about destroying some guy!
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Post by Zaia »

You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.
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Post by Vertigo1 »

Zaia wrote:You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.
now that's just mean. :lol:
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Post by Zaia »

Vertigo1 wrote:
Zaia wrote:You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.
now that's just mean. :lol:
:mrgreen:
"On the infrequent occasions when I have been called upon in a formal place to play the bongo drums, the introducer never seems to find it necessary to mention that I also do theoretical physics." -Richard Feynman
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Post by InnerBrat »

Ever siad that, sweetie?

It's just I know a Chica who has actually uttered the sentence i posted above...
"I fight with love, and I laugh with rage, you gotta live light enough to see the humour and long enough to see some change" - Ani DiFranco, Pick Yer Nose

"Life 's not a song, life isn't bliss, life is just this: it's living." - Spike, Once More with Feeling
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Post by Tsyroc »

InnerBrat wrote:Ever siad that, sweetie?

It's just I know a Chica who has actually uttered the sentence i posted above...
I think your comment has been voiced many times in real life. :D

...but not by anyone I know...or have met.
By the pricking of my thumb,
Something wicked this way comes.
Open, locks,
Whoever knocks.
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Post by Vertigo1 »

Zaia wrote:
Vertigo1 wrote:
Zaia wrote:You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.
now that's just mean. :lol:
:mrgreen:
If you ever said that to me, I'd prolly have to tickle you to death. ;)
"I once asked Rebecca to sing Happy Birthday to me during sex. That was funny, especially since I timed my thrusts to sync up with the words. And yes, it was my birthday." - Darth Wong

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