Oh fgalkin.. You crazy Russky [IM chat about.. wierd stuff]

kojikun · Post by **kojikun** » 2004-03-07 03:27am

fimagal2001: besides, I don't get the fascination with Japan
fimagal2001: I think japanese culture is weird
fimagal2001: except for tentacle hentai, that is
fimagal2001: that's weird, but good
PsygnisFive: bah, YOURE weird.
fimagal2001: no, YOU'RE weird ;P
PsygnisFive: well this is true
fimagal2001: at leas I perfer my females human-looking
fimagal2001: not with a tail of any kind
PsygnisFive: hey, boys with tails is great
fimagal2001: *furry boy gets assarped by a tentacle demon*
PsygnisFive: THAT = GOD
fimagal2001: no, that's very bad. For the demon, that is
PsygnisFive: hardly.
fimagal2001: poor things, how do they reproduce when human/elvish females are not around?
PsygnisFive: they reproduce by cutting off limbs that grow new bodies.
PsygnisFive: didnt you know that?
fimagal2001: poor things indeed
fimagal2001: *feels sad for the poor guys*
PsygnisFive: nah, it doesnt hurt them
PsygnisFive: the moment their limb is severed, it feels like a thousand orgasms
fimagal2001: Huh? Where do you get that info?
PsygnisFive: tentacle demons are known to get a bit crazy, cutting off so many limbs they're paralyzed and cant do anything until they grow back. its just that addictive.
fimagal2001: what do they do to solve the overpopulation problem?
PsygnisFive: oh, they dont have to. they inhabit huge planet-cities and orbital-like structures.
PsygnisFive: theres enough room to grow.
fimagal2001: still, they've been at it for a long time
fimagal2001: and what do they eat?
PsygnisFive: but thats part of why they send tentacle demons to earth for sex: so they dont cut off limbs and reproduce
fimagal2001: ah
fimagal2001: I see
PsygnisFive: its quite brilliant, once you think about it.
PsygnisFive: theyre so busy having a thousand orgasms that they dont even need to cut off their limbs.
fimagal2001: but sad. Now, they can't cut off their dicks and must have the poor substitute
fimagal2001: they don't have 1000 limbs
PsygnisFive: they dont have dicks, actually.
fimagal2001: and even if they do, they can't get 1000 females at a time
PsygnisFive: you see, they have sperm arms.
fimagal2001: sperm arms?
PsygnisFive: yes, its a tentacle that has dick-like functions.
fimagal2001: ah, I'd love to see that. Assuming it is nowhere near my orifices
PsygnisFive: well thats the thing. tentacle demons traditionally greet one another by having wild tentacle sex.
fimagal2001: They have orifices as well?
fimagal2001: I thought they had tentacles, and that's all
PsygnisFive: do not engage in it is considered highly disrespectful, akin to spitting on the sidewalk as someone walks past.
PsygnisFive: no no, they have holes as well. you just never notice them because mostly you only see their tentacles
fimagal2001: ah, but what about the 1000 orgasms bit? They don't have that may tentacles
PsygnisFive: sure they do, theyre pandimensional beings and what you see is merely their 3D manifestation in this particular slice of the higherdimensional universe.
fimagal2001: but waht about 1000 females?
PsygnisFive: what about them?
fimagal2001: where do they get 1000 orifices to plug their tentacles into?
PsygnisFive: Theres 6 billion on this planet alone, and theres an infinity of planets in this particular universe, let alone the infinities of universes.
fimagal2001: they can't have all those females, and no one noticing it
fimagal2001: 1000 people is a small city
PsygnisFive: yeah, but if you do a thousand out of 10,000,000, and you return them by nights end, whos to notice?
fimagal2001: their friends, realtives, etc
PsygnisFive: not when theyre sleeping.
fimagal2001: besides, since they only attack japanese schoolgirls, there is much less to choose from
PsygnisFive: they come at night, mostly, you know? they take the women and men while theyre asleep, and have hot wild sex for days within a temporal distortion field, keeping the people high on sleep-nullifying drugs, then return them back to their beds after moments outside the temporal distortion fields.
fimagal2001: I mean, Japan must be crawling with them
PsygnisFive: they are. but you never notice them.
fimagal2001: And you want to go there why?
PsygnisFive: the only time you do is when their memory wiping systems arent functioning perfectly.
PsygnisFive: uh.. tentacle demons? kay guy, thanks.
fimagal2001: you want to be raped by a tentacle monster?
fimagal2001: why?
PsygnisFive: have you seen the size of their tentacles?
fimagal2001: yes, and I don't want that thing in me
PsygnisFive: thats because youre not a fruit like me.
fimagal2001: that's gotta hurt. A lot.
PsygnisFive: nah. they inject nanites that project a space-distortion field allow you to take things of obscenely large size without harm. doug winger's anthros are known to use similar technology.
PsygnisFive: ((I think I'm doing rather well weaving this complicated net of BS together, don't you?))
fimagal2001: indeed
fimagal2001: we should post it to SDN
PsygnisFive: indeed.
fimagal2001: so, let's continue. What is your theory on how they evolved?
PsygnisFive: definitely geneered from horny japanese boys and american furries in the distant future, then sent back in time.
fimagal2001: That seems to be the case, indeed

Post by **fgalkin** » 2004-03-07 03:35am

There is more

fimagal2001: The tentacle monsters must have a large amount of hearts
fimagal2001 (2:31:10): not to mention eyes at the end of some tentacles
PsygnisFive (2:31:32): they dont need them, their biocybertech allows the instant transport of vital chemicals to every cell in their body instantaneously.
fimagal2001 (2:31:51): and something resembling a vaccum cleaner for the penises of the human males
PsygnisFive (2:32:07): nah. spooge just gets all over the guy
PsygnisFive (2:32:33): apoptygma berzerk is a great group
fimagal2001 (2:32:38): you think so? The vaccum thingy might actually make their dicks larger
fimagal2001 (2:32:42): or not
fimagal2001 (2:32:53): it might make them shrink
PsygnisFive (2:32:59): lol
PsygnisFive (2:33:04): i have to sleep my russian friend
PsygnisFive (2:33:10): nighty night :p
fimagal2001 (2:33:11): which would explain why Japanese men have small penises
PsygnisFive (2:33:18): hahahahaha
fimagal2001 (2:33:26): see, sicentific evidence!
fimagal2001 (2:33:41): we'll make a new branch of biology!
fimagal2001 (2:33:51): Hentaitenatacology!
PsygnisFive (2:33:56): hahaha
PsygnisFive (2:33:59): night XD

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

Tasoth · Post by **Tasoth** » 2004-03-07 03:43am

too much time, way too much. I hope you feel good contributing more to my mental scarring.

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2004-03-07 04:38am

My mind is a blackened, scarred pit. Stuff like this is like dumping radioactive waste into said pit. Not good for it but it's beyond the point of making it any worse really.

Post by **fgalkin** » 2004-03-07 02:25pm

Aw, c'mon, people, its not that bad.

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

kojikun · Post by **kojikun** » 2004-03-07 02:27pm

darthdavid wrote:My mind is a blackened, scarred pit. Stuff like this is like dumping radioactive waste into said pit. Not good for it but it's beyond the point of making it any worse really.

VICTOLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comosicus · Post by **Comosicus** » 2004-03-07 04:23pm

You guys could make a thesis on tentacle monsters

Singular Quartet · Post by **Singular Quartet** » 2004-03-07 05:47pm

What, you think they aren't?

AnimeJet · Post by **AnimeJet** » 2004-03-07 05:53pm

Haha, funny. Waaaay too much time on your hands though o_O

Andrew J. · Post by **Andrew J.** » 2004-03-07 08:30pm

Singular Quartet wrote:What, you think they aren't?

I'd like to see the college that would accept that thesis!

Brother-Captain Gaius · Post by **Brother-Captain Gaius** » 2004-03-07 09:15pm

...Odd.

That's really all I have to say.

Lonestar · Post by **Lonestar** » 2004-03-08 01:05am

You're both wierd.

h0rus · Post by **h0rus** » 2004-03-08 05:40pm

Sounds like the typical tired attempts at being silly that you see rampant on any private discussion or forum.

Comosicus · Post by **Comosicus** » 2004-03-08 05:42pm

Andrew J. wrote:
Singular Quartet wrote:What, you think they aren't?
I'd like to see the college that would accept that thesis!

A psychiatry college, as a brilliant example about the infinite depths of human imagination

Post by **fgalkin** » 2004-03-08 09:11pm

h0rus wrote:Sounds like the typical tired attempts at being silly that you see rampant on any private discussion or forum.

I don't try to be silly, it comes naturally.

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

Phantasee · Post by **Phantasee** » 2004-03-08 10:26pm

Hehe...tentacle hentai...will your thesis include diagrams, and a bibliography for pictoral references? If so, please send me the first available copy...

Captain Cyran · Post by **Captain Cyran** » 2004-03-08 10:44pm

It all makes so much sense...

SyntaxVorlon · Post by **SyntaxVorlon** » 2004-03-09 12:54am

Andrew J. wrote:
Singular Quartet wrote:What, you think they aren't?
I'd like to see the college that would accept that thesis!

No, any college that would theoretically accept that thesis would be to busy having sex in the temporally distorted nurses office, where apparently half the school can fit and have sex in all at once, while not disturbing anyone else in the school, in the hall way or in the beds adjacent.