Fic(BtVS): Whatever Happened Too, the Anit-Xander-Powers fic

[Majin Gojira]

Title: What Ever happened to…
Author: Majin Gojira
Genre: Drabble/Parody/Horror
Rating: PG-13

Summary: All of Xander’s pre-exposed powers re-emerge…who in their right mind thinks that’s a good thing?

Notes: This is my rally against stupid Xander-Stu powers by bringing back the one power everyone likes to ignore.

*

Xander could feel the energy coursing through him. The memories of the soldier came flooding back to him, he could feel the strength of the Hyena return as well as the enhanced senses. He took a deep breath, testing his heightened sense of smell—and fell over in a coughing fit as a horrible scent of rotting, swampy muck filled his lungs.

As he struggled to regain his breath and recover from the stench, his body began itch and burn. His fingers dug into his skin…and tore it off, revealing the scaly hide beneath it. Within minutes, the husk that many would have recognized as Xander Harris was gone…crumpled with skin and cartilage against the creature’s feet. A hulking fish-monster with mystically enhanced strength and memories it could no longer comprehend roared in anguish before bolting for the nearest body of water.

Fin.

*

[consequences]

Wow, that was freaking harsh.
I kind of liked it.

At least Xander had previously imbued powers, giving authors far more excuse than exists in other examples I've seen(I swear, if one more yutz makes Akane Tendo the Slayer, my head's probably going to explode).

[Crazedwraith]

One could make the argument Xander could retain his spell powers ie) soldier and hyena when the magic drug powers would need exposure to the magic drugs in the steam to be reborn. I'm just playing devil's advocate though.

[Crown]

Is it just me, or did anyone else think that Hyena Xander was just plain out cool?

[Majin Gojira]

One could make the argument Xander could retain his spell powers ie) soldier and hyena when the magic drug powers would need exposure to the magic drugs in the steam to be reborn. I'm just playing devil's advocate though.

Unfortunatly, I've shot down this devils advocate stance more times than I care to count.

RE: Hyena

1. It's not as strong as people claim it is (They claim he is almost as strong as a slayer based on dialogue...however, 5 of them cannot break down a normal door with one pushing against it.)

2. It was caused by a posessing spirit which also causes incredible cruelty, uncontrolable lusting and known cases of canabalism. No one seems to remember this.

3. The spirit was exorsized from him. No trace remnants. No remaining changes. All that was left was remembering what he did durring that time. Has anyone ever been Re-Possessed?

RE: The Soldier

1. It pertained only to military knowledge. Access Codes, how to operate certain weapons, base schematics, and other grunt-knowledge.

To quote:

I know procedure, ordnance, access codes, everything. I know the whole layout for this base, and I'm pretty sure I can put together an M-16 in 57 seconds.

The soldier he dressed as was not an elite, he was a grunt. A Private at best. They way some people write him, it's like he was a Navy SEAL or some other elite ops.

2. The Memories begin to fade as early as Season 3 (See: Graduation Day Part 2). By the middle of Season 4, he does not consider himself qualified enough to join the Swiss Army (See: The Initiative). By Season 7....it's all gone. (Reference: "Never Leave Me", his knowledge of sleeper agents comes not from the military knowledge, but from movie trivia).

Same deal with the fish. A few tranfusions and the stuff was completely out of his system.

If you're going to bring those 2 back...bring back the fish!

[CaptainChewbacca]

And the funny SYPHILIS!

[Setzer]

Plus his hypnosis by the dark prince...bater.

[Demiurge]

Actually, I would have liked it if Xander had kept his elite mad soldier skillz.