StarDestroyer.Net BBS

Spoiler Rex finished chugging his beer. He shook his head, the room seemed to be spinning a little. A loud burp emanated from his mouth, rising loudly over the music.

"Hehe, now that was a 8 out of 10."

One thought: if we decide on the joint rendevous, we can settle for the less powerful but less expensive Kicker-A booster stage, da?

But we'll still need to do that development either way, and kicker development is comparatively cheap- we save money but not that much money going for Kicker-A. And Kicker-A commits us to all the issues associated with joint launch.

EDIT: So this is not really an argument in favor of Kicker-A, since we can use boosted Proton to loft a shuttle to the moon anyway. The idea of sending Voskhod round the moon is actually intriguing, but so much depends on its reliability. Under the best of conditions Voskhod's reliability is none too high for a mission profile with eleven capsule stages...

The Voshkhod is actually reliable enough once tested ; I think the idea behind low max r&d values for Mercury/Vostok and Gemini/Voshkhod was to encourage a somewhat historical approach of "lots of unmanned tests before man-rating".

Doesn't really work because the computer is cavalier with its flights and takes lots and lots of risks while not being penalized, but hey

Anyways...I am prepping for simulating the next season right now. I seem to have solved the issues with my astronaut level reduction hack, which makes me glad because I won't have to juggle savegame files around

You can expect an update in a couple hours, unless something comes up. Sorry I couldn't do it through the weekned, but I was busy.

EDIT: And Fox, it's PETE Conrad

He's one of the chief arguments by moon hoaxers, BTW: they argue astronauts should've been serious on such a momentous trip and no "real man" would goof off and joke when he could die any minute.

After a period of failure and problems, the Zenobian space program was set to get back into the game - and with many, many new hardware solution to test, it was bound to be a busy year!

The cosmonauts, the technical workers and of course the ever-watching Politburo were all scrying the first test of a boosted A-Series rocket and a brand-new Voshkhod capsule.

Dispensing with the countdown rituals, Syrgy Pavylyvych simply turned the launch key in his console, and all bets were off.



The rocket lit off beautifully ; The additional, third stage also worked without problems. After good capsule separation, the people at Baikonured performed a battery of tests and trials, finding several minor faults with the design.



Overall, a great success.
Meanwhile, in Murca, they were beating the Zenobians to the punch. Outrunning them in training. Leaping past their posts. Slipping beyond their oil.

There were many more colorful expressions used by the launch control crew to show off how radical, awesome and bitchin' Murca was. Never before has so much sheer patriotism ruled inside the control rooms.

Johnny von Braun was sure an even higher concentration was, in fact, possible. A special division of THE CAPE's copious researchers were already workin' on it very hard, and have determined several ways to increase the amount of PATRIOTISM generated.

Anyway, after long and hard preparations, it was time to go.




Despite everyone's apprehension towards Mercury - as one engineer put it, a "barely tested death trap of a tincan" - the launch and orbital insertion went splendidly. But that wasn't the new, frontier-pushing activity the flight was supposed to accomplish.

"Alright Fox. Your telemetry looks good, your instruments check out. You are go for orbital stay."

"Copy that Cape.", Fox Modem seemed tense and nervous. The flight psychologist almost grounded him, but quickly reversed his decision after his backup, Flashheart, drove on base one day while wearing his pants on his head.

While it was quickly determined that happened because of the astronaut's night out, rather than sheer insanity, the psychologist wouldn't take the chance.

Anyways, the flight controllers couldn't be more tense if they tried to, so it's not like just the astronaut was worried. The flight was supposed to be short, shorter than Kelly's now-famous jaunt to orbit, but far more dangerous.



Fox was reading off a massive pre-EVA checklist, "...spacecraft secured and my suit is on. Gauges read green. Batteries eighty percent. Fuel within parameters. Consumables within parameters. Valve test...ok. Suit pressure test, ok. Whew. Any other items left?"

"Negative Fifteen", Modem's CAPCOM was his brother, Rex. His massive hangover from last night notwithstanding, he was doing an okay job, "Standby."

The flight director consulted with his team, and finally gave the sacramental order, "Tell him we are go for EVA."

"Okay, Fox, you are go for EVA."

Rex held his thumbs. That was the single most dangerous part of the mission. The flight team watched telemetry data with incredible intensity, observing as the astronaut depressurized the cabin. He was walking everyone through the procedure on the radio, as a backup.

"Okay Cape...I am opening the hatch now...there's no problem, it works fine in vacuum...I have unstrapped and I am standing up...wow...wow. Just...oh my god..."

"Fifteen! Fox, come in!", Rex felt his heart jump up, remembering all the science ficshun comic books he'd read as a child. Oh no. Astronauts did not say 'oh my God' without reason.

"It's beautiful, Cape. I am...", Fox's breathing was somewhat labored, "...I am outside the spacecraft and looking at the Earth. It is gorgeous. Gee wizz, nothin' back home can compare to that!"

"Flight, we're getting video from the outboard camera."



With an almost religious wonder, the entire flight team watched the first man walk in the vacuum of space. Despite the poor quality of the video, and their Murcan meatheaded jock-like attitudes, the sheer momentousness of the occasion really found their mark.

It didn't last long, though. Fox had quickly become overexherted, and was ordered the return to the spacecraft, repressurize the cabin and sleep. The next morning, preparations began to fie the retros.

And disaster struck.

"Cape, I have landing bay deploy light on."

"Crap...", one of the engineers muttered under his breath.

"What did he say?", the flight director asked, rising his head from a checklist he was reviewing.

"I think it was landing bay deploy light, on.", Rex said

"INCO, could this be an instrumentation problem?"

"Uh...", the controller hesitated for a moment, "Unclear."

"Let's assume it's not for the time being. If it's an actual fault, what's it gonna do to us?"

"Well...it means the heat shield is no longer secured into position. Only the retropack holds it in place."

"Wasn't that the issue we have a modified procedure for, what was it..."

"Oh! Yeah! Let me get back to you, flight!"

In orbit, Fox was beginning to get worried. He tapped the light a few times, made sure the landing bag deploy switch was off, but the continued silence from mission control was getting on his nerves.

But finally, he received the word, "Okay bro, we're gong to retain the retropack. The engineers think it was a problem they identified a while back, okay? So continue as planned, but do NOT jettision to retropack. Pressure of re-entry will keep the heat shield in place."

Or so they think..., Rex didn't say that.

"Okay. Let's get on with it."



The capsule soon fired its retros and plunged into the atmosphere. People inside the control room held their breaths for a good three minutes, a couple passing out in the process.



But everything went fine. Not half an hour later, Fox was being fished out of the capsule by Murca Marines and their helicopters.



Later examination of the capsule would reveal that the heat shield had indeed come off. Murca had its first emergency in space, but thanks to preparation and true Murcan self-reliance, the astronaut survived!
"The Politburo is not happy, comrade Chief Designer. A Murcan had walked in space last month, and we have nothing to show for our program!"

"I am aware of that, comrade Comissar", Syrgy sighed from his position over a launch console, "But that is why we are running those test flights, da? Do not worry, I have reviewed the information. The Murcan only went out for fifteen minutes as most. We can beat that - our capsule is far more advanced, and we are not risking a son of the Motherland by having him do it alone."

The comissar nodded. Somehow, Syrgy Pavylyvych was able to reassure this hardened NKVDVDROM killer with his speech alone.

That was inspiring. And also dangerous.

"Everything is ready. Let us begin, da?"




Not two minutes later, pieces of the rocket were raining dwon on Boratistani steppes. The local garrison troops would have some work to do, scouring those and picking up every last piece of the rocket to prevent it from falling into Murcan hands.

The astronauts were still running around on the grass in front of the Administration Building, hauling a bare-chested Fox on their backs, a bottle of champagne in one hand and his new gold astronaut pin attached directly to his pecs.

Such an inspiring sight!, Mr. Gray thought, but quickly snapped out of it. Horseplay and morning runs with oiled up men on your backs were a thing for astronauts, not planners. With the Director away, mr. Gray had things to do! Important things! Budget decisions! Program reports! Press conferences, congressional hearings, presidential reports...and of course he had to make sure that, uh 'donation' from a major corporation didn't come with any strings attached. That would be bad.

"Sir?", it was the secretary, "Uh, astronaut Cuntser asked me to hand this to you..."

Oh. Yeah. And astronaut resignations. Shit.





[/size] "Comrade Chief Designr...", Shroomanski began, "...I have convinced the Central Comittee to provide you with additional funds, da, but I expect results for that. Many of my colleagues think that the Murcans already have us beat in this race, da? They already contaminate space with their degenerations! We must not allow that to continue."

Syrgy could do little but nod. The additional funds were nice, yes, but he felt so much was out of his control. The constant political pressures from all sides, the technical problems...it all accumulated into massive stressors.

Not even the gentle swaying grass of Boratistani steppes could soothe the Chief Designer's ravaged heart.







GM Notes:
Right. So, Murcans have spent their failure mode prevention thing: the actual failure was during the "rescue/recovery" mission stage but I moved it a bit for flavor. Next mission doesn't get a free break, so catastrophe might loom again.

On the other hand, catastrophe might loom for Zenobians, too, since one of their suborbital tests didn't go all that well

The boosted A-Series still is a bit low with reliability, after all.

OOC - Woot! Nikov will command the first multi-crew launch from Boratistan, to make benefit glorious nation of Zenobian Onion!

IC - Nikov had to stop himself cartwheeling through Baikonurek's corridors at the Chief Designer's subdued announcement about Voskhod IV's crew.

Apparently the technicians were worried about his moustache and all the bristly scratching sounds it somehow managed to cause inside a closed helmet.

For the good of the Onion, the mo had to go. Nikov would be damned if he let some facial hair - even a moustache that had been growing since the early part of The Salvation War: Part Deux! - stand in the way of Zenobian glory, not to mention the possible Hero of Zenobian Labour....

... wait... for something like that, the complete fucking fruit-and-nutbar inspired genius, Comrade General Secretary Shroomanski, a worthy successor to Zhtalin, would insist on presenting it in person, complete with interminably long excellently-crafted speech and abuse of podium accompaniment by shoe.

On second thoughts, it may be better to burn with the capsule...

Premier Shroomanski will preserve Nikov's mustache for to keep record glourious heroic achievements of comrade proletarian peoples in space!

Bob Johnson was in a room. It looked like a small break room, but somehow it was also huge. It had a water cooler and coffee maker and ashtrays as usual, but also strange devices he couldn't identify, like futuristic boxes that lit up and had food in them, and one of them said “ding.” And all around, there were these giant birds and some superhero girl with pink hair in mechanical armor and a robot made of stone who was wearing a bear rug and some guy who was simultaneously every age between 17 and 90 and aliens and monsters and all sorts of other strange animals and creatures. Some of them were talking to each other or just enjoying their coffee and breather. He had this funny feeling of connection with all of them.

And then a giant bald eagle checked his wristwatch...despite not having a wrist...and shrieked. “Bob! Wake up! You'll be late to work!”

Then Bob jolted awake. He did his wake-up checks.

1) Where am I?
I am in my cot on base. Don't remember how I got here, but I'm here.
2) Where are my pants?
Conveniently, they were on top of his blanket. Bob rushed to slip them on.
3) What time is it?
Seven minutes until he was supposed to be at a meeting, but if he sprinted, he could just make it!

So he sprinted, with the hangover catching up to him about halfway to the building, but he still managed to show up with fifteen seconds to spare.

Later that day, he remembered having a crazy dream and tried to recall it, but could only pull back up something about an eagle with a watch and then he poured a lovely girl into some beer. The rest had all faded, but oh well. More important things needed doing.

OOC:
I had more or less anticipated at least one unmanned capsule test failure. I'm still worried about this flight- the odds of a success aren't exactly stellar, and even with recoverable failures factored in I suspect it's something like 50/50. But neither my budget nor my launch schedule have much chance if the Murcans are given unimpeded opportunities to outrun us.


Also, the break room! Where'd the robot made of stone come from, Amy?

Clearly, the Murcans are gravely behind the curve in Radarange technology.

Simon_Jester wrote:OOC:
I had more or less anticipated at least one unmanned capsule test failure. I'm still worried about this flight- the odds of a success aren't exactly stellar, and even with recoverable failures factored in I suspect it's something like 50/50. But neither my budget nor my launch schedule have much chance if the Murcans are given unimpeded opportunities to outrun us.

Well, I've been doing some dry runs and it looks okayish, but I obviously can't guarantee anything. If it wasn't for Murca's serious break on the Mecury, Fox would've been dead or injured, after all. Recovery/landing problems are not as fatal as re-entry ones, but still bad.

I would have loved to see one of the Modems handling the shit Grissom got into over his Mercury capsule.

Simon_Jester wrote:I would have loved to see one of the Modems handling the shit Grissom got into over his Mercury capsule.

Now I have that image in my head, and it's giving me ulcers. Goddamn you, Simon...

"Ha! You must secretly be a Zenobian spy! For is your middle name not Ivan?"

"Uh, no."

"CRAP!"

By the way, PeZook, what is our (Zenobian) projected budget for 1965?

The Voshkhod is actually reliable enough once tested ; I think the idea behind low max r&d values for Mercury/Vostok and Gemini/Voshkhod was to encourage a somewhat historical approach of "lots of unmanned tests before man-rating".

Doesn't really work because the computer is cavalier with its flights and takes lots and lots of risks while not being penalized, but hey

Not to mention that there's very little time or money in general to do such unmanned tests, especially since they get you only a 1% bonus - and only if successful, I think.

Checking quickly shows we're a little behind historical schedule - Voskhod 1 went up in October '64, Voskhod 2 in March '65 - but apparently there really was a first successful unmanned test and then an unsuccessful unmanned test beforehand.

I'm still pretty confident that Voskhod can get us back the lead over the Murcans, though.

This mission will be more closely equivalent to Voskhod 2; it's physically impossible to replicate the three man Voskhod 1 mission in BARIS. Our first launch is due in, oh... what, November '64 or January '65? We're about on schedule in that.

And yeah, the biggest problem with the unmanned tests is just that there's no money for it. Each unmanned Voskhod flight costs 13 MB, which is a healthy chunk of an annual budget; you cannot fly a dozen of those before sending up your first manned capsule. It's just not gonna work.

I'll try to get my budget plan together for the year; big priorities will be, of course, budgeting the two Voskhod launches, followed by research into the hardware to get everything up and working properly.

Ah, yes, I see now, we do have a manned Voskhod flight scheduled for this turn. Then we are in fact roughly on schedule.

Don't worry Comrades, it is just a few small delays at this point, let the Muricans grow overconfident with thier inferior spacecraft, soon we will be comfortabley in the lead once again when we send Two men into space!

Yes ; If the flight succeeds, you swipe an absurd amount of prestige for a single mission. Heroes of the Zenobian Onion will literally rain upon you.

If the capsule explodes, heroes of the Zenobian Onion will still rain upon us. Literally!

Probably just as well. Given our Murcan astronauts God only knows what would happen if we sent two of them up alone. At least with a three-man crew we can have someone sane along to chaperone.

I had a thought.

In this setting, much Zenobian propaganda makes references to "Murcan degeneracy." They never specify exactly what they mean... and yet somehow everyone gets it.

Probably because the Muricans don't help thier case. At all.

But yes, Comrades of Zenobia, we can pull ahead once again, we are like small underdog in Muricans own foolish propoganda, soon the Muricans will trip up and our next generation of more advanced Zenobian spacecraft will perform feats so astonishing the Muricans will be left in the dust.

And of course, secure an increase in funding to keep things that way.
Spoiler

A commissar's job isn't all shooting; one must be able to wield the carrot as well as the stick.

What if we developed some kind of gun that shot carrots, letting me do both at once?

I'll get Dr. Vanko right on it; we may be able to adapt the proposed EVA gas gun for the task.

Plan Pavylyvych, Fall 1964

Let us salute comrades Nikov, Mametov, Karzanovski, and Yebanov for their bravery and dedication! These valiant men, soon to ascend into the heavens on the Voskhod capsule, bear on their shoulders the future of Zenobian spaceflight. All technical staff, administrative departmentologists, and maintenance personnel are thanked for their efforts to make the upcoming launch a success, and are asked to continue their efforts at a high pitch of activity in the coming months.

---

Starting budget: 52 megarubleoids

Hardware Procurement
(All this hardware is for the launches this autumn)

Purchase 2 Booster Stages
Purchase 2 A-Series Rockets
Purchase 2 Voskhod Capsules

Total cost: 26 MB
Remaining budget: 26 MB

Research and Development
Chief priority is getting EVA suits up to snuff for the Fall 1964 manned launch, and working the kinks out of the Proton rocket. We are also re-initiating Cosmos research on a small scale, since I'm hoping to launch Cosmos probes next year.

5 MB for 5 teams on EVA Suit research.
9 MB for 3 teams on Cosmos Probe research.
12 MB for 3 teams on Proton Rocket research.

Remaining budget: 0 MB.

Launch Scheduling
As I recall, there is no prestige boost for being first to a duration milestone- you need to do it, but you don't get extra credit for doing it first. Moreover, I don't feel like I can count on beating the Murcans to Duration B- the only way that's happening is if Johnson/Conrad fails, and I choose not to gamble against his (whichever) survival and success.

So I will not be scheduling Duration B next season, as I'd rather further improve systems reliability using unmanned launches- we've got several components of the system that are all less reliable than I'd like, and my main reason for launching is that the strategic situation created by waiting another year for the next manned flight is virtually intolerable. I will seriously consider another manned launch aimed at the duration milestone in Fall 1965; if not, I will be attempting other prestige-making things.

Schedule two unmanned suborbital Voskhod launches for Spring 1965. Hardware will be purchased in the spring; alternatively, the launch(es) will be cancelled.