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Anyway, when I was young, I tried chewing a staple. It got stuck in my gum. Luckily, I got it out by myself, so noone knew what happened. Also, I burned my gladius in the shower a few years ago. That sucked.

"I burned my gladius in the shower"?

I'm afraid I don't understand. Gladius is Latin for sword. Swords don't normally burn, nor do things in showers. Can you please explain what I'm missing?

hot water.....a person's "sword".....now do you get it?

IG-88E wrote:hot water.....a person's "sword".....now do you get it?

On that note, don't ever get anything like Icy Hot or Ben Gay in that area. Not pleasant.

Oh, I get it now. I don't have all that good an understanding of human idiom as of yet. I spent the last few centuries in a cave on Mars with my fingers in my ears.

Darth Yoshi wrote:Anyway, when I was young, I tried chewing a staple. It got stuck in my gum. Luckily, I got it out by myself, so noone knew what happened. Also, I burned my gladius in the shower a few years ago. That sucked.

I stapled my tongue once. Not nice.
I burned myself with an iron too. Not nice.
I ran up a flight of stairs, tripped, and hit both shins on the edge of a step. Not nice at all.

I once had a small spork that I managed to jam into an electrical socket when I was 4. My mother quoted my as yelling, "WHEEEEEEEE" as I flew across the room and through a large window.

Sienthal wrote:I once had a small spork that I managed to jam into an electrical socket when I was 4. My mother quoted my as yelling, "WHEEEEEEEE" as I flew across the room and through a large window.

rofl on that one....I have never tried to stick anything in electrical outlets...

However, I did take up cooking...resulted in many burns and cuts.

While fixing an electric motor in a washing machine I copped a nice shock that threw me back and left me without feeling in my arm for about an hour.

Raxmei wrote:Oh, I get it now. I don't have all that good an understanding of human idiom as of yet. I spent the last few centuries in a cave on Mars with my fingers in my ears.

lol

reminds me of 'men are from mars, women are from venus.' no wonder there's a communication gap between the sexes...! this explains much....

Once, when my GF had spent the night over, we woke up and saw 2 feet of snow on the ground. We got really hyped up, cause the whole school had been waiting for the snow. So what did we do? RAN OUT, wearing simple jeans and t-shirts, and had a snowball war. We both got colds, of course, but they weren't too bad and it was fun.

Ahh, but Guys like my Cousin "J." have no trouble communicating with women.....



As for the stupidist thing I have ever done.

Rode a Bike down hill at 55mph, with traffic, no safety equipment.

When my back tire hit that pot hole, I thought I was dead for sure.
The microsecond later when the shocks broke, the frame snaped and the greatly reduced KE transfered it's self through to my reproductive parts, I was wish I had been right.....

Well I did a really stupid thing a couple of years back.

Drove to a friend and decided to take a short cut thou a park (hedges and all).

Slipped in the mud and busted a knee. Did’t know it then but I busted the ligaments.

Ok what wold a sane person do when hes on his back in mud and a knee that hurts like hell…

Well I did have a cell phone, a car, and a friend close at hand.

I took my stupid ass and limped to the buss…

Got off that buss and sat down wait on the next one that was heading home…

That buss came I stand up rather fast fell over hit my head and passed out cold…

The buss diver, other people at the station all freaked out and called an ambulance so I did get to the hospital but all in all why the hell did’t I do one of these things.

Call for assistance.

Walk/crawl up to my friend,

Get to the car and drive to the hospital.

I guess I’ll blame it on shock or something.

Another stupid thing I did....I tried to date girls. Anna being one of them (Larz remembers this well, too, I'm sure....that fucking stalker bitch....grr....)

And another thing...don't complain about me trying ot date girls...leaves more game for you guys, right?

Run at the Cajun Dome with a phone book, losing balance because of cement level drop, sprained ankle, it was fucking hilarous. Sad my E-Bay plan failed.

My best friend once got stinking drunk at a party, wandered into a bathroom, lost conscioussness, and pitched face-first into the toilet. If someone else had hadn't found him shortly afterwards, he may well have drowned.

IG-88E wrote:Once, when my GF had spent the night over, we woke up and saw 2 feet of snow on the ground. We got really hyped up, cause the whole school had been waiting for the snow. So what did we do? RAN OUT, wearing simple jeans and t-shirts, and had a snowball war. We both got colds, of course, but they weren't too bad and it was fun.

Did that too when we got the first decent snowfall this past winter. The problem was my GF tripped my ass onto the snow and pinned me down good. Unfortunately I couldn't do anything about it seeing that she's about the same weight as me and stronger too (damn swimmer chicks), which meant I got stuck in the snow for a good while and ended up with a cold.

I have a whole website dedicated to the idiots I deal with at work. But as a forewarning, many of you will be offended by the content...but then again, it's supposed to be offensive and funny at the same time.

Anyway, link's here: http://www.gotdoom.com