Aeon Natum Engel (NGE cross-over)

[Vehrec]

WEAK

Show us what really happened you pansy!

[JonB]

I wish there was some emote to describe my response.

So response, I can only say:

what

[EarthScorpion]

I have to say, yes, that is pretty much the reaction I expected. And, yes, I do deserve this.

This isn't the planned end. This is just how it ends. It's disappointing, leaves more questions unanswered than answered, and, of course, Everybody Dies.

It's perfectly fitting for something based on FEAR, NGE and the Mythos.

But, no, in more seriousness, this is just the end for ANE. I reread the earlier chapters, and so much of it is rather obvious with things that I chose not to do, that, after all, this is my first major fiction, and I have improved a lot since the start, where I didn't work out what I was doing until Chapter 5, at the very least.

So the rewrite begins, to actually sit down and tie everything together, and upgrade the early chapters to the same writing standards as the most recent ones. I just wanted to give a bit of closure, and so show what could happen if the Evangelions fail (or Rei feels it necessary to use the nuclear option).

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entelechy (plural entelechies)

1. The complete actualization and final form of a potency or potentiality, or of a conception. [Aristotelian philosophy.]

2. The final form as already in the potency or matter and awaiting actualization.A particular type of motivation, need for self-determination, and inner strength directing life and growth to become all one is capable of being.

3. It is the need to actualize one's beliefs. It is having a personal vision and being able to actualize that vision from within.

4. Something complex that emerges when you put a large number of simple objects together

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Aeon Entelechy Evangelion

A Rewrite of Aeon Natum Engel

Coming Soon

[JonB]

Fair enough. I can understand where you are coming from given the source material. Still quite the shocker of an ending, given the sudden ... well, it wasn't the Shoggularity proposed by Academia Nut. But the resolution does some out of no where, a deus ex Alma that completely blindsides the reader with next-to-no buildup or warning. As a writer myself, I cannot really 'like' the idea of such a resolution. But my like or dislike isn't going to change the result, or why you chose to go that way.

Looking forward to Aeon Entelechy Evangelion.

[Vehrec]

I have a way to end it at anytime anyway.
I’ll just be like “Congratulations!” and that usually settles everything, right?

Congratulations! You've graduated from the[REDACTED and REPLACED] ((Jacqli)) School of Writing! Over 300 years of best-selling popular novels by our founder cannot possibly be wrong, right? I mean, she must know what people want!

Me, I would not have done this. I understand that I am not you, but I do not understand this need to tie in all the plot threads neatly. Life isn't neat. Extras exist for a reason. And all stories are without ending or beginning.

Tying everything together in a neat little package is not something that lends verisimilitude to a setting, IMO.

[Undead Unicorn]

BOOOOOOO!!!! Needs more boobs.


Seriously while not an ideal ending, it was farily good. Given that its really easy to make a REALLY bad ending as opposed to decent one for a story of this genre and high quality, good job.

I'll say here what I did on Eva Geeks...best piece of Evangelion fan fiction I've ever read.

[Mayabird]

Alright, welcome to the board. For future reference, it's usually better not to reply to a thread that hasn't been responded to in about two weeks or so unless there's a really good reason, but since this was still on the first page I'll let it slide this time.

[Garlak]

Since this has been bumped recently... for those who don't know yet: Aeon Entelechy Engel, the rewrite, has been posted on SpaceBattles' Creative Writing forum. The first chapter prologue, anyway. Go check it out there.

Aeon entelechy Evangelion (ANE rewrite) prologue.

[EarthScorpion]

Since this has been bumed recently... for those who don't know yet: Aeon Entelechy Engel, the rewrite, has been posted on SpaceBattles' Creative Writing forum. The first chapter anyway. Go check it out there.

To be exact, that's the Prologue. I'll be posting Aeon Entelechy Evangelion here (and other places beyond SB), once the true first chapter is actually complete, but... well, I suspect I was already walking on thin ice with some people, who might be a tad tetchy about how ANE ended ( ), and so I am only going to put it up once there is actually text which is new, and contributes to the story. Not that the Prologue doesn't; it's just that... well, it's written to provide as little context as possible.

Also... funfun, I actually have a proper beta for this one, as opposed to only-doing-the-spell-checking. Yes, it's actually going to be less prone to divergence into things that I find interesting, or spontaneous world-building. Of course, "less prone" is not an absolute...

[SylasGaunt]

Well the bump reminded me to get caught up with this and it's out of the two weeks zone..

Can't say I'm really satisfied with the ending. Perhaps in part due to the fact that I'm only partially familiar with F.E.A.R. having played through the original once years ago and without having played any of the expansions or the sequel so the whole Alma threat didn't seem nearly as well developed from a narrative standpoint as it needed to be for the 'SURPRISE ALMA OMNOMNOM!' ending to work. I thought it was great right up until then though with the massive efforts to bring down the sleeper in fire. Even it getting snacked on seemed like a great hint at the threats to come and then.. well to make use of how you pointed out you plan your stories like an RPG campaign, it was like giving the group a great plot hook for the next step of the adventure and then immediately following it with 'Rocks Fall, Everybody Dies'.

Oh and I'm quite surprised this didn't end up stashed near the start of chapter 15 like a couple other music bits: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRXQsQKGqIU