StarDestroyer.Net BBS

Zaia wrote:

Knife wrote: Hon, your trying to hard here. Tying yourself into knots is not going to benifit you or him. You are creating more of a problem then you originaly had 4 pages ago.

I'm actually not nervous now (haven't heard anything back yet, but--go figure--the internet in the entire school system is down, so he hasn't read it yet), and I feel better knowing that he will know how I feel.

I don't think I'm trying too hard, I think I'm worrying and thinking too much. Or, at least I was. But it's hard not to be spooked by something like that when you've just spent a whole bunch of time building up your confidence to completely put yourself on the line.

So, now I guess we just wait....

*hugs*
Good luck!

It's always the hardest part building up the courage to actually go and express the feelings, after that it always feels better.
The worrying and thinking too much part was the biggest obstacle all along, honey, which is why you have a 9-page thread in the first place to help you find the answer. Besides, it has been a good excuse to pamper and pay attention to you, something few people on this board would be averse to.

You did get my PM, I hope?

Edi

*crosses fingers* Good luck

[quote="Zaia]I don't think I'm trying too hard, I think I'm worrying and thinking too much. Or, at least I was. But it's hard not to be spooked by something like that when you've just spent a whole bunch of time building up your confidence to completely put yourself on the line.

So, now I guess we just wait....[/quote]

now we play the waiting game...........

eh the waiting game sucks lets play hungry hungry hippos

lol, your definatley in now zaia, how can he possibly say no with so many people here willing to kick teh crap outta him for you

I hope it works out like you want it to.

You missed you chance to tell it to him face to face because you thought too much. I know, just saying "Shut your thinking up for this moment" is easy. I am just glad you told it him finally .

Good luck sis

I'm glad to hear you've told him, after a fashion. Hope it turns out OK, Zaia.

Wow, I rarely feel compelled to actually participate in message boards (I am a confirmed luker!). That I am doing it with this post is even more interesting, since it's a totally OT thread for this BBS. Further, I know this is very out of the blue, so feel free to ignore this posting!

Anyway, to get to the point, I just ran across this thread and I was immediately enthralled with the topic, probably because I am ever vigilant in my search for knowledge of the female psyche! To Zaia, I am glad you worked up the courage to actually express your feelings. I believe things will turn out well for you.

Why? Put simply, guys (like me) are wimps, and big scaredy cats when it comes to girls! Like others in this thread have pointed out, we are almost always in need of something very overt (as in sticks out like a sore thumb) to know that a girl is interested in us. Road signs, instruction manuals, and/or gauges would be nice =) Another strange aspect to this phenomenon that I do not pretend to comprehend is that I (and those like me be they boy or girl) can easily detect when girl A likes boy B (or visa versa), as long as we are not one of the parties involved. *Sigh*, but I digress……

In any event, it is good that you have expressed your feelings. Like you, I have been discouraged often by the lack of perceived reciprocation from my love interests, and therefore did not pursue anything beyond a normal friendship with those people. Sadly, on more than one occasion I leaned (to late, sadly) that feelings were mutual. This is not something I would wish on others. It’s very true, in my opinion, that “it’s better to regret the things you have done, than to regret the things you haven’t done”, at least when it comes to this type of thing).

And, there’s my verbose nature coming out to play. I’ll stop now since you probably stopped reading, rightfully so, about three paragraphs ago…

POKE!

Guys like you need to be POKED every once in a while towards a more proactive direction. And since you're a n00b it serves a dual purpose.

Zaia if all else fails cash in a little bit of your good Karma and wish upon a star. Good luck comes to those who want it.

Miles Teg wrote: In any event, it is good that you have expressed your feelings. Like you, I have been discouraged often by the lack of perceived reciprocation from my love interests, and therefore did not pursue anything beyond a normal friendship with those people. Sadly, on more than one occasion I leaned (to late, sadly) that feelings were mutual. This is not something I would wish on others. It’s very true, in my opinion, that “it’s better to regret the things you have done, than to regret the things you haven’t done”, at least when it comes to this type of thing).

Hopefully, you've learned from those times, and are more likely to go for it these days. Yes, it can be painful, but it can be painfree to .

Anyway, welcome to the BBS, and don't be afraid to post more often, the more people posting, the more chances the readers can learn things they didnt before.

As this is the OT forum, why not post a thread with an intro, or failing that, take a look at the other threads about things you like and post in there?

Miles Teg wrote:Wow, I rarely feel compelled to actually participate in message boards (I am a confirmed luker!). That I am doing it with this post is even more interesting, since it's a totally OT thread for this BBS. Further, I know this is very out of the blue, so feel free to ignore this posting!

I would never, ever ignore anyone who posted something in a thread of mine. The whole point is to get people's input! Why would I ignore you, because I haven't read things by you before? All the more reason for me to read! Silly boy. *kisses Miles' nose*

Anyway, to get to the point, I just ran across this thread and I was immediately enthralled with the topic, probably because I am ever vigilant in my search for knowledge of the female psyche! To Zaia, I am glad you worked up the courage to actually express your feelings. I believe things will turn out well for you.

*chuckles* Understanding the female psyche is easy. Take any given situation involving a guy, and completely overanalyze to the point where everything has such a huge significance that the fate of your relationship with said guy could hang on the balance of a salad fork. Basically we just make everything as complicated as possible. Understanding WHY we do that, that's another thing entirely. I don't even know that.

Wish I did, actually. Overanalyzing is annoying.

Why? Put simply, guys (like me) are wimps, and big scaredy cats when it comes to girls! Like others in this thread have pointed out, we are almost always in need of something very overt (as in sticks out like a sore thumb) to know that a girl is interested in us. Road signs, instruction manuals, and/or gauges would be nice =) Another strange aspect to this phenomenon that I do not pretend to comprehend is that I (and those like me be they boy or girl) can easily detect when girl A likes boy B (or visa versa), as long as we are not one of the parties involved. *Sigh*, but I digress……

Yes, that sounds very much like the guy I'm dealing with, especially the last part. He's extremely good at picking up very small behaviour clues, but mostly just for other people. I get the feeling like he's been rejected before, so I think that screws up his insight for behaviour relating to himself.

In any event, it is good that you have expressed your feelings. Like you, I have been discouraged often by the lack of perceived reciprocation from my love interests, and therefore did not pursue anything beyond a normal friendship with those people. Sadly, on more than one occasion I leaned (to late, sadly) that feelings were mutual. This is not something I would wish on others. It’s very true, in my opinion, that “it’s better to regret the things you have done, than to regret the things you haven’t done”, at least when it comes to this type of thing).

Well, the expressing wasn't the hard part. Waiting for a definitive answer--now that is what's killing me now.

And, there’s my verbose nature coming out to play. I’ll stop now since you probably stopped reading, rightfully so, about three paragraphs ago…

AhahaHAHahAHha, proved you wrong, didn't I?! Bwahahah! I did NOT stop reading, I appreciate every single word you typed up, and I thank you very sincerely for doing so! HA! TAKE THAT!!!

Zaia wrote: I would never, ever ignore anyone who posted something in a thread of mine. The whole point is to get people's input! Why would I ignore you, because I haven't read things by you before? All the more reason for me to read! Silly boy. *kisses Miles' nose*

Not bad, Teg. 9 posts and you already rate a kiss from Zaia. You future looks bright, indeed.

And, there’s my verbose nature coming out to play. I’ll stop now since you probably stopped reading, rightfully so, about three paragraphs ago…

AhahaHAHahAHha, proved you wrong, didn't I?! Bwahahah! I did NOT stop reading, I appreciate every single word you typed up, and I thank you very sincerely for doing so! HA! TAKE THAT!!!

OK, I count three smileys, a light-hearted remark concerning a salad fork I admittedly don't get, and one entire joking paragraph in her reply. Zaia is in a good mood so I think you just scored one for the good guys. Keep it up, Teg!

I would add my own best wishes but the opinion of people who regularly go up against machinegun-toting madmen in a black rubber suite wielding glorified boomerangs should propably treated with a wee bit of caution

Batman wrote: I would add my own best wishes but the opinion of people who regularly go up against machinegun-toting madmen in a black rubber suite wielding glorified boomerangs should propably treated with a wee bit of caution

Hey! What I get upto in my own time is no business of... oh right the Batman thing, my mistake, carry on.

Rob Wilson wrote:

Batman wrote: I would add my own best wishes but the opinion of people who regularly go up against machinegun-toting madmen in a black rubber suite wielding glorified boomerangs should propably treated with a wee bit of caution

Hey! What I get upto in my own time is no business of... oh right the Batman thing, my mistake, carry on.

Rob - Rob Wilson - Robson - I got it!


Robin

waiting for responses to relationship questions - I really hate that. spend hours panicking.

why I prefer to do it in person, really.

Rob Wilson wrote: Hey! What I get upto in my own time is no business of... oh right the Batman thing, my mistake, carry on.

Hey! Keep your hands off my madmen! I'm trying to make a living here you know! Those are MY takedowns!!!

...except between Superman and a shitload of Jedi, the only machinegun-toting madman left here is propably Shep. And I don't think I'm allowed to arrest fellow flamewarriors. Oh well...

*gets out bat cellphone*

Hi Alfred, it's me. It looks like I will be home in time for dinner after all.

Very well Master Bruce. I shall see what I can do.

Thanks Alfred.*Hangs up*

Knife:

HFMRLMAO!!!!*
Yeah, and have you checked our respective postcounts? While I'm out there fighting crime, HE's back at the Manor exploding our phone bill
(and, admittedly, being nice to Zaia). No wonder I need this superhero job, a mere millionaire could NEVER pay for this.




I say we cap it here before this turns into a threadjack.

Back to your regular Zaia, already in progress


*Hanging From My Rope Laughing My Ass Off

Enforcer Talen wrote:waiting for responses to relationship questions - I really hate that. spend hours panicking.

why I prefer to do it in person, really.

I didn't know there was any other way-either waiting OR panicking

Sorry. I'll be a good bat now.

salad fork = nothing/nothing + woman's brain = turning nothing into something ---> some catostrophic "insight" into the relationship = misery for all


That's overanalyzing for ya.

Zaia wrote:salad fork = nothing = turning nothing into something = some catostrophic "insight" into the relationship = misery


That's overanalyzing for ya.

My cat's analysis of this thread: Flop on back, nuzzle against Daddy, headbutt his typing hands constantly, and be loooooved.

This isn't that bad of advice, really. Relax, enjoy life. You only get one shot, and being constantly cuddled and petted is not the worst outcome.

Huh similar to my own kitty, Nitram...except she screams at me.

Still enjoy, and I understand the anxiety so I'm hope things turn out good.

Ghost Rider wrote:Huh similar to my own kitty, Nitram...except she screams at me.

Still enjoy, and I understand the anxiety so I'm hope things turn out good.

*ahem* refers everyone back to Batmans comments regarding Threadjacking, and the avoiding of same.

Batman wrote:

Zaia wrote: I would never, ever ignore anyone who posted something in a thread of mine. The whole point is to get people's input! Why would I ignore you, because I haven't read things by you before? All the more reason for me to read! Silly boy. *kisses Miles' nose*

Not bad, Teg. 9 posts and you already rate a kiss from Zaia. You future looks bright, indeed.

Dang, he's good. I have 1500 some and I still haven't managed to get one of those...

First off, *kisses Cyran's cheek* Thanks for being a sweetheart, hon.

Ok, so I talked to him tonight on the phone. We were talking about other things, and then he said, "So...I got your email. I'm sorry I didn't write you back about it, but I wanted to talk to you, either in person or over the phone."

Then he told me that now wasn't really a good time for him because he only just got out of a relationship--I was rather surprised at that (since he never mentioned her EVER and she never went out all the times I went out with him, and no one else ever mentioned her, you know, like when he was flirting with me or anything), and said, "Um, you were?!!" So he said, 'Yeah, see, I'm so bad at it, you didn't even know.' Then he went on to tell me how he'd thought about the possibility of us, but then said that he was really, really, REALLY bad at relationships and couldn't do that to me. Apparently he's had bad experiences in the past with friends & dating and it went very badly.

We talked for about 20 minutes, I guess, and I still have some questions, but for the most part he sounds like he needs to take care of himself. He said something about how he can see himself being single for the next few years, until he gets his head straightened out, but I don't know about that. He's too fabulous to remain single that long.

Anyway, it might be stupid or naive of me, but I'm not very deterred by this. I love him, and if he needs to figure out issues, he can have all the time he wants. I simply can't imagine myself finding anyone as wonderful as he is if I were to spend the next fifty years wandering the world, so I can't give up that easily. If he really meant that he had thought about us together, then why should I give up? I don't think he would have said that to soften the blow (at least, I hope he wouldn't do that--that'd be awfully mean), so that gives me hope that maybe one day things will work out. I'm not going to go all psycho on his ass; I just will be here.

So....there you go.

Well, sorta understand where he's coming from more now. Bad relationships really screw with your head...I know all too well.

But if you're waiting for him, hope he deserves it honestly. But I'm sure in some way he does because you're not just going to arbitraily fall for a jerk.

So best of luck, Zaia.

do you want me, Cal, Tropen, and Sporkzen to come slap him around a bit? you know..."bring him to his senses" if you know what i mean.

heh heh heh

Ah, shit, I'm sorry Zaia. I was sure from your posts that it was going to work out for you. Hopefully, he'll get over his issues and you can get together with him, but in the mean time, you are right not to pressure him.

For someone who just got turned down, you have a very positive and wonderful attitude, Z. (I wish I could stay that positive after I get turned down.)

I think you're head's in the right place on this one. Give him a little time and maybe things will go your way.

Best of luck,

~ Iggy