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Vympel wrote:Deep ... fried ... mars bar??

Just back away slowly...


I want to know why my Soviet memorabilia catalog doesn't have sections of scrapped SS-18 ICBM casings for sale.

Sea Skimmer wrote:

I want to know why my Soviet memorabilia catalog doesn't have sections of scrapped SS-18 ICBM casings for sale.

Can you get Soviet military watches/ sunnies from it?

Darth Wong wrote:If we're talking about things we just don't understand, I'm surprised no one's mentioned women yet

Strange...I understand women perfectly, then again I am one and I can't be confusing myself now can I?

And what's really driving me batty is that I keep having dreams where my sister is Liv Tyler, I don't get it. Sure there's some resemblance but still, it's creepy!

Darth Yoshi wrote:I don't get why I need four years of English to graduate. My mastery of the English language is fine, and I'd like to concentrate on other things, thank you very much.

I don't get that either. Where I come from, you need 4 years of English, PE and History to graduate, but only 3 years of math and science. I think it should be the other way around.

As for reality TV shows, I don't get them either. I might understand why companies might make them, as they don't have to pay them a million dollars an episode like they do with scripted shows, but I don't get why people keep watching them. And, IIRC, they're planning a "Reality Channel". If it fails, then there might be hope for humanity after all.

I don't get underwear either. It's pretty much a pointless step, in my opinion. After all, by the time you're old, weak, and bedridden, you've probably gone back to wearing diapers, so why not wear them all your life? (Just kidding, I don't think that)

jmac wrote:

Darth Wong wrote:If we're talking about things we just don't understand, I'm surprised no one's mentioned women yet

Strange...I understand women perfectly, then again I am one and I can't be confusing myself now can I?

You DO? I don't understand women in the slightest!

jmac wrote:Strange...I understand women perfectly, then again I am one and I can't be confusing myself now can I?

Bah. You haven't lived until you've confused yourself.

Superman wrote:Yes, TV ads in the theater piss me off to no end also. TV is a free medium for us (sort of) because the advertisers pay for it. We have to watch their fucking commercials.

WE are paying to go see movies in the theater, and they expect us to watch their fucking ads? Fuck them and their stupid products. God I hate it how these fucking corporations are taking over...

Movie theatres don't make much money, if at all, on the tickets. Their primary revenue stream comes from advertisements (from the slideshow and the pre-movie ads) and concessions - and various distributors are demanding a cut from concessions as well.

Vympel wrote:

Sea Skimmer wrote:

I want to know why my Soviet memorabilia catalog doesn't have sections of scrapped SS-18 ICBM casings for sale.

Can you get Soviet military watches/ sunnies from it?

IIRC, one of their watches (Sovietski) was actually made from ex-ICBM casings.

Vympel wrote:Young women going out with men about 10 years their senior. Ugh.

As long as their over 20 then they're fair game!

Sea Skimmer wrote:

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi wrote:What are some things that just don't make any sense?

For me, this makes me wonder:

1. Those "Not sold in stores" miracle products
I've seen the infomercials for some of these products, and if they work as claimed, then they could get rich off of them. But why do they decide to sell it through infomercials at 3 AM instead of putting it in stores? I'm sure selling it in stores would make them a lot more money.

Emphasis on if they worked. In reality most couldn't get any store to carry them, and don't have the money to pay for the large inventory that would require. That all because they dont work.

But why products like Beavis & Butthead DVDs? Plenty of people would buy those.

And I never got a reasonable explanation for why seemingly random words are considered bad and can even have legal effects (there are still profanity laws on the books). It's obviously not the meaning of the word; synonyms are fine. It's not the sound of the word. I'm not looking for a reasonable explanation, I'm just looking for one. At least they have some shitty excuses for why sex and nudity should be the most heavily guarded secrets under law.

Vympel wrote:Deep ... fried ... mars bar??

What you never heard of them?

The one thing that makes no sense to me, is why we can't get working region-free DVD players here.

PrinceofLowLight wrote: And I never got a reasonable explanation for why seemingly random words are considered bad and can even have legal effects (there are still profanity laws on the books). It's obviously not the meaning of the word; synonyms are fine. It's not the sound of the word. I'm not looking for a reasonable explanation, I'm just looking for one. At least they have some shitty excuses for why sex and nudity should be the most heavily guarded secrets under law.

In 1066 French speaking Normans took over England and French became the court language. Anglo-Saxon became the vulgar language, literally the common language, and inappropriate for polite company. They then decided that if you have to refer to bodily functions, you should use a euphemism, so saying defecate rather than "freshen up" or some such was a bit rude, and using the Anglo-Saxon word, shit, was very rude.

Frankly, most human behave confuses me. Intellectually I can understand basic motivations, but so many people display such incredible stupidity, I can't begin to understand people.

Drinking, excessively mainly.

I can't understand the allure or alcohol to the point that people like to get pissed out of their minds.

Wow, you puked up all over your room last night and got slapped by several girls after wasting £40 on booze. Want a medal?

What I wanna know is why 'certain' people care about what I do in my own fucking bedroom and who I do it with, to the point they'll kill another sovereign sentient human being in order to fucking "fix" their asshole problem.

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:What I wanna know is why 'certain' people care about what I do in my own fucking bedroom and who I do it with, to the point they'll kill another sovereign sentient human being in order to fucking "fix" their asshole problem.

They're intolerant bigots, ignore them unless they charge you with a knife in which case you have my blessings to castrate and disembowel them.

Admiral Valdemar wrote:

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:What I wanna know is why 'certain' people care about what I do in my own fucking bedroom and who I do it with, to the point they'll kill another sovereign sentient human being in order to fucking "fix" their asshole problem.

They're intolerant bigots, ignore them unless they charge you with a knife in which case you have my blessings to castrate and disembowel them.

Just remember to do it with a rusty butter knife.

EDIT: Whoops, forgot to mention what I don't understand:

Suburban white women. More specifically mothers, but I've seen some childless ones. Example:

At the local park, (Just to give you a piece of info, there are (supposedly) leash laws, but no one cares about them) a woman has her dog (Big, brown shaggy dog, named Chewbacca ) off the leash, and its running around being playful. Whate suburban woman has her little dog (probably barks to much, too) on its leash, when Chewbacca runs up to sniff the little dog. Naturally, the woman immedialty assumes that this big massive dog is out to bite her little dogs head off, thus she quiclypicks up her dog, and begins screaming at the other lady, who, knowing that there is nothing that can calm the suburban white woman, promptly leaves.

I have had other such experiances. My own dog, a black lab, likes to get away form the house (READ: make a run for it, and wait for us to appear and take him back home (READ: Someone finds him, calls us saying that they have our dog)) Now, down the hil from us is a Beach.Naturally, this is the only place where the suberban white female s(and their children) and the Hispanic population of the town interact (Read: Happen to be at the same place for the same reason) Naturally, this is an excellent place for a rambunctious (read: Really annoying) dog to run down to, steal some random toy (buckets espeacially) and run off back into the woods next to formentioned beach. White suburban mother's reaction: "THAT DOG IS ATTACKING MY CHILD!!!!" Hispanic reaction: "Oh. That dog. Somebody want to catch it? The owners will be along in a few minutes, and I figure that kid wants his shovel back."

Living in the suburbs sucks.

Next of Kin wrote:

Vympel wrote:Young women going out with men about 10 years their senior. Ugh.

As long as their over 20 then they're fair game!

Only 10 years? That's a piece of cake: maturity. I'd say those women are looking for guy who's gotten through his college/drinking/partying/hooking up days and wants someone ready to settle down.

Now, the ones who date men..oh, 30 or 40 years their senior--THOSE I don't understand. No amount of money could be worth spending your life with someone who was going through a mid-life crisis around when you were being born. Ewww.

Sea Skimmer wrote: I want to know why my Soviet memorabilia catalog doesn't have sections of scrapped SS-18 ICBM casings for sale.

Because my father bought them back in the early 90's. No really. Where else to you get a whole bunch of titanium fuel tanks about 10m high and 1.5m wide from a military surplus auction in Eastern Europe...

Johonebesus wrote:

PrinceofLowLight wrote: And I never got a reasonable explanation for why seemingly random words are considered bad and can even have legal effects (there are still profanity laws on the books). It's obviously not the meaning of the word; synonyms are fine. It's not the sound of the word. I'm not looking for a reasonable explanation, I'm just looking for one. At least they have some shitty excuses for why sex and nudity should be the most heavily guarded secrets under law.

In 1066 French speaking Normans took over England and French became the court language. Anglo-Saxon became the vulgar language, literally the common language, and inappropriate for polite company. They then decided that if you have to refer to bodily functions, you should use a euphemism, so saying defecate rather than "freshen up" or some such was a bit rude, and using the Anglo-Saxon word, shit, was very rude.

Frankly, most human behave confuses me. Intellectually I can understand basic motivations, but so many people display such incredible stupidity, I can't begin to understand people.

Learn something new every day. Is the origin of all of our curse words Anglo-Saxon?

Zaia wrote:Now, the ones who date men..oh, 30 or 40 years their senior--THOSE I don't understand. No amount of money could be worth spending your life with someone who was going through a mid-life crisis around when you were being born. Ewww.

Going by the unwritten "half your age plus 7" rule that would mean hmm...a guy would need to be 76 before a 30 year age difference results, in this case he'd be dating a 45 year-old woman by the rule. It's not something I want to think about too much.

Singular Quartet wrote:Suburban white women. More specifically mothers, but I've seen some childless ones. Example:

Hey, my wife is a suburban white woman!

At the local park, (Just to give you a piece of info, there are (supposedly) leash laws, but no one cares about them) a woman has her dog (Big, brown shaggy dog, named Chewbacca ) off the leash, and its running around being playful. Whate suburban woman has her little dog (probably barks to much, too) on its leash, when Chewbacca runs up to sniff the little dog. Naturally, the woman immedialty assumes that this big massive dog is out to bite her little dogs head off, thus she quiclypicks up her dog, and begins screaming at the other lady, who, knowing that there is nothing that can calm the suburban white woman, promptly leaves.

I have had other such experiances. My own dog, a black lab, likes to get away form the house (READ: make a run for it, and wait for us to appear and take him back home (READ: Someone finds him, calls us saying that they have our dog)) Now, down the hil from us is a Beach.Naturally, this is the only place where the suberban white female s(and their children) and the Hispanic population of the town interact (Read: Happen to be at the same place for the same reason) Naturally, this is an excellent place for a rambunctious (read: Really annoying) dog to run down to, steal some random toy (buckets espeacially) and run off back into the woods next to formentioned beach. White suburban mother's reaction: "THAT DOG IS ATTACKING MY CHILD!!!!" Hispanic reaction: "Oh. That dog. Somebody want to catch it? The owners will be along in a few minutes, and I figure that kid wants his shovel back."

Living in the suburbs sucks.

Hate to break it to you, but if the law says you're supposed to keep your dog on a leash, then you're supposed to keep your dog on a leash.

Jumbo Shrimp
Why so many people like Eminem
Why Crystal clear pespsi was a failing product despite everybody i know drinking it
Why humans persue pain
The success of the Olsen twins and how they became billionares
Why Pauly Shore has yet to make a decent movie
Why i cant have my own chocolate factory like willy wanka
California public schooling
Why everyone tries to learn the meaning of life, but nobody is concerned with the meaning of death


those are just a few things off the top of my head

Vympel wrote:

Sea Skimmer wrote:

I want to know why my Soviet memorabilia catalog doesn't have sections of scrapped SS-18 ICBM casings for sale.

Can you get Soviet military watches/ sunnies from it?

Yes

I do understand why CD sales are falling, but how come many of the arists that do sell a lot of records aren't all that great?

I don't understand diet pop either. It tastes like the real thing, or at least for a few seconds. Then, it has this really bad aftertaste to it. I'd rather live life as a diabetic than have to drink that stuff.

Finally, I don't get why lottery winnings aren't tax free. If they say "Win a million dollars!", then you should win a million dollars with the taxes on it paid for, or else you might as well say "Win a million dollars, but lose half of it because of taxes!".

I don't understand when my atoms lose their electrons, they're being oxidized, but when they gain them, they're being reduced.

STAY STILL DAMMIT!