Moderator: Edi
Drooling Iguana wrote:What? Did we go to war with Russia and somehow I missed it? Or was it with China? How'd I manage to miss that? I've really got to start paying more attention to current events.Communism
The USA can be credited with defeating the USSR through economic methods and other methods. Warfare is not all about shooting, you know--warfare is essentially all forms of competition between countries pursued towards a specific aim. I actually think Sun-Tzu would approve of Reagan's methods. We collapsed the USSR by faking them into thinking we were developing a weapon we weren't and then we were able to outspend them to death. It cost us billions of dollars but that's cheaper than an atomic war, isn't it?Simon H.Johansen wrote:
He might have been referring to General Pinochet, who overthrew a democratically elected government in order to preserve the free market.
Actually, Allende got about 36.2% of the vote in that election. So, strictly speaking, he didn't have a democratic mandate.Simon H.Johansen wrote:Drooling Iguana wrote:What? Did we go to war with Russia and somehow I missed it? Or was it with China? How'd I manage to miss that? I've really got to start paying more attention to current events.Communism
He might have been referring to General Pinochet, who overthrew a democratically elected government in order to preserve the free market.
But wasn't the sheer amount of votes gathered by Allende & Co. (as well as his socialist views) the main reason that the USA backed up Pinochet's coup d'etat?Durran Korr wrote:Actually, Allende got about 36.2% of the vote in that election. So, strictly speaking, he didn't have a democratic mandate.Simon H.Johansen wrote:He might have been referring to General Pinochet, who overthrew a democratically elected government in order to preserve the free market.Drooling Iguana wrote:What? Did we go to war with Russia and somehow I missed it? Or was it with China? How'd I manage to miss that? I've really got to start paying more attention to current events.
Nuff said.albinoblacksheep.com wrote:The Complete Military History of France
- Gallic Wars
- Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian.
- Hundred Years War
- Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." Sainted.
- Italian Wars
- Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.
- Wars of Religion
- France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots
- Thirty Years War
- France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.
- War of Revolution
- Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.
- The Dutch War
- Tied
- War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War
- Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.
- War of the Spanish Succession
- Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.
- American Revolution
- In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."
- French Revolution
- Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.
- The Napoleonic Wars
- Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.
- The Franco-Prussian War
- Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.
- World War I
- Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.
- World War II
- Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.
- War in Indochina
- Lost. French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu
- Algerian Rebellion
- Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.
- War on Terrorism
- France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.
The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should not be "Can we count on the French?", but rather "How long until France collapses?"
"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. All you do is leave behind a lot of noisy baggage."
Or, better still, the quote from last week's Wall Street Journal: "They're there when they need you."
Snipped most of the list cause these two example pissed me most,like a typical American you leave out Canada and act like you won them by yourself.StormTrooperTR889 wrote:Nuff said.albinoblacksheep.com wrote:The Complete Military History of France
- World War I
- Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.
- World War II
- Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.
While Canada was involved from the beginning, it was with a total force (entire war) of slightly under 420,000 soldiers. By comparison, the American military was 3,500,000 soldiers. Meanwhile, American ships were carrying Allied supplies, in violation of the neutrality acts of the age, and the American Merchant Marine was involved in the war from the beginning. The German High Command's diaries often make mention of seeking peace solely due to the extra influx of men and supplies by the Americans. If the war had remained solely European, Germany had no intention of seeking an armistice.Montcalm wrote:WW1 the US got involved in the last year of the war while British and Canadian were there from the beggining.
True, Canada did commit 1,000,000 soldiers over six years. The RCAF was a good unit, and the Canadian armored units handled their Shermans well. By comparison, the State of Ohio raised 760,000 soldiers. And again, the American Merchant Marine was involved in the beginning, while American equipment was used by the British Empire and the USSR. Russia top aces flew Bell P-39 Airacobras, while the British convoys were protected by American "four-stacker" destroyers. Among the "minor" nations (outside the Big 5 of US, UK, USSR, Germany, and Japan), China suffered the greatest casualties, with 11 million (equal to the entire population of Canada at the time).WW2 the US got involved only when PH was attacked,and for kicking Germans butt Canada was in there too,so do not presume the US can win all war by itself,remember Viet-Nam.
BattleTech for SilCoreStanley Hauerwas wrote:[W]hy is it that no one is angry at the inequality of income in this country? I mean, the inequality of income is unbelievable. Unbelievable. Why isn’t that ever an issue of politics? Because you don’t live in a democracy. You live in a plutocracy. Money rules.
They should join the club of people that were beaten by Italians , which also includes erm... everyone except the people who were too far away to make it to the party.albinoblacksheep.com wrote:The Complete Military History of France
- Gallic Wars
- Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian.
We didn't really back it to the extent that we are often accused of. We supported some right-wing groups and supported two truckers' strikes, but in the long run it really didn't made a decisive difference. The coup would have happened either way.But wasn't the sheer amount of votes gathered by Allende & Co. (as well as his socialist views) the main reason that the USA backed up Pinochet's coup d'etat?
I live in the real world. Do you want me to go through the wars piece by piece?StormTrooperTR889 wrote:Pablo, where do you live? France CANNOT WIN WARS.
Already answered this one.- Gallic Wars
- Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian.
Jean's role is greatly exaggerated, much in the same way that English like to exaggerate Wellington's role in beating Napoleon. The French beat the English and toss them off the continent thanks to an inherently superior national military capacity and the efforts of legitimate military geniuses like Arthur Richemont and Gilles de Rais.- Hundred Years War
- Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." Sainted.
This would be better if the French hadn't actually lost to the Habsburgs and their buddies, who were in point of fact the most experienced and accomplished military in Christendom at the time, and probably pound for pound one of the top 10 armies of all history.- Italian Wars
- Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.
No familiar with this one.- Wars of Religion
- France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots
Or maybe France fights Spain (the largest most powerful country in the world) to exhaustion, smashes up German Catholic troops, and singlehandedly subsidizes the efforts of Gustavus Adolphus. In the end it was French arms and French money which saved north German protestantism, and fatally weakened Spain.- Thirty Years War
- France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.
No real disputes here.- War of Revolution
- Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.
- The Dutch War
- Tied
The French come within a hair's-breadth of total continental victory and only tie because of the intransigence of the Tzar.- War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War
- Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.
Lost? I see. So that's why a Habsburg sat on the Spanish throne after the war.- War of the Spanish Succession
- Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.
Yeah. Because the French didn't make up more than 50% of the Continental Army at Yorktown, and that fleet under Admiral de Grasse was 100% American.- American Revolution
- In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."
And Austrian. Don't forget how they beat the shit out of the intervening powers.- French Revolution
- Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.
This is the worst one, because it's clear that even the guy who wrote it doesn't believe it. He keeps packing on the qualifiers to distract us from the fact that France made nearly every other notable nation on Earth it's bitch for more than a decade and put up impressive numbers in every battle. The Napoleonic WarS are actually a series of wars, all but one of which France was able to win with much bonecrushing and destruction of her enemies.- The Napoleonic Wars
- Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.
France loses against the strongest military industrial complex in the entire world. Wow, they must suck.- The Franco-Prussian War
- Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.
Jingoistic ahistorical masturbation ahoy. American troops under French command, using French tactics, and in many cases French weapons, help finish up a war in the final year.- World War I
- Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.
See Franco-Prussian war response.- World War II
- Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.
America lost the same war much more thoroughly and humiliatingly.- War in Indochina
- Lost. French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu
The French choose not to cling to stupid colonialist aspirations and just let it go. What losers. And hey, let's look at the Brits through the same lens--no wait, we won't, because they're friendly to the USA.- Algerian Rebellion
- Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.
France DOESN'T want to fight an unwinnable war against an abstract concept which is getting worse by the day? Cowards!- War on Terrorism
- France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.
A red X?Simon H.Johansen wrote:Okay, as there apparently still is NOBODY who understood my reference to the Simca 1100....
In case you don't know what a Simca 1100 is, this is a Simca 1100:
To me it doesn't display a red X but a mint-condition Simca 1100. (a French car from the 1970s)Gandalf wrote:A red X?Simon H.Johansen wrote:Okay, as there apparently still is NOBODY who understood my reference to the Simca 1100....
In case you don't know what a Simca 1100 is, this is a Simca 1100:
[url]http://www.allpar.com/model/images/1100.jpg[/uræ]
