StarDestroyer.Net BBS

aphexmonster wrote:Okay, ive only been gone for like a day. What the fuck is going on? Everyone has a billion stars, Mike Wong is banned ? Theres a new forum? ... Someone please explain something to me ;_;

LadyTevar wrote:

aphexmonster wrote:Okay, ive only been gone for like a day. What the fuck is going on? Everyone has a billion stars, Mike Wong is banned ? Theres a new forum? ... Someone please explain something to me ;_;

April Foools!

Tribun wrote:I think, every April 1st, the S&#/% hits the fan here.

verilon wrote:Unfortunately, I missed last year's hooha.

aphexmonster wrote:Okay, ive only been gone for like a day. What the fuck is going on? Everyone has a billion stars, Mike Wong is banned ? Theres a new forum? ... Someone please explain something to me ;_;

The Main Site Updates Page wrote:April 1, 2000

Massive rewrites to the site. After careful consideration, I have finally realized that the superior technical sophistication of the Federation will easily overcome the primitive and weak Empire. I have also reconsidered my attitude toward science, pseudoscience, and religion. I have therefore made the following major changes to the site:

Phaser page updated to recognize the fact that phasers can destroy entire continents in seconds as loosely supported by vague dialogue in TDIC. Apparent contradictions with direct observation are obviously due to bad special effects so they should be ignored. Apparent contradictions in the rest of canon are obviously due to yield settings, so they can all be ignored as well.

Turbolaser page updated to recognize the fact that the Death Star couldn't possibly do what it did, so the obliteration of Alderaan should be stricken from the canon and not considered in firepower estimates.

Shield pages updated: I have accepted that phasers would pass effortlessly through Imperial shields because they're phase-coherent. Also, Federation shields would be immune to all forms of Imperial weaponry from missiles to ion cannons, turbolasers, and even Death Star blasts.

Propulsion pages updated to recognize that the Millenium Falcon can only travel at 1.5c because of what Han Solo said. The SW galaxy must therefore be only a few light-days wide. I had previously come to the erroneous conclusion that this interpretation of dialogue was oversimplistic and therefore wrong. I had assumed that it must be wrong because millions of star systems could not exist in such a small space, but that was before I found out about recent discoveries in particle physics which make it possible.

Ground combat pages updated to accept the terajoule energy estimates produced by numerous posters on the newsgroups. I have now accepted that hand phasers can hit targets dozens of kilometres away and destroy entire cities with a single shot, as proven by the multi-terajoule figures from the newsgroups. The fact that we have never seen anything remotely resembling this level of destructive power on the show is obviously due to yield settings.

Kansas page deleted. I have now accepted that the Bible is God's Word and therefore constitutes a valid piece of scientific evidence. I can show that the Biblical Creation, the Great Flood, and everything else in the Bible is the absolute literal truth, and that scientists are engaged in a worldwide conspiracy of silence. I can also show that evolutionists are all immoral because religion = morality, so if they're not religious, they must be immoral. On an unrelated note, I would like to express my support for those who wish to post the Ten Commandments in public schools as a way of decreasing crime. When you consider all of the Jews and Muslims whose souls were saved during the holy Crusades and Inquisitions, you can begin to recognize how the union of church and state has always produced superior morality.

Tactics pages updated to recognize that a war would consist of the Imperial fleet flying to a pre-arranged point in deep space and then sitting still while Federation ships warp-strafe them, instead of flying around destroying strategic targets as I had previously assumed. This is because real military commanders will always prefer an honourable macho showdown to a planned attack on his enemy's weaknesses (and of course, the idea requires that warp strafing be feasible, and we all know it is).

The fanfic was completely rewritten to show a cross-universe war the way it would really be: the Jedi characters all lose their Force skills the moment they enter the ST galaxy, and Imperial technologies are all utterly useless against the unfamiliar Federation technology. Of course, since Federation technology is superior in all ways, it all works flawlessly against the unfamiliar Imperial technology. In fact, it all works better than it ever has before, destroying trillions of cubic metres of armour with every shot. And of course, I rewrote the beginning to show the USS Carolina effortlessly deflecting a Death Star blast with its navigational deflector and then destroying the Death Star with a couple of torpedoes. The rewrites were necessary to inject a much-needed feeling of realism into the story.

I also made a few changes before I came to my new appreciation of the way things are:

I am in the process of rewriting the page to use cascading style sheets. It's an experiment, so if you see anything which doesn't work, please drop me a line. Some of the tables were replaced with CSS-based columns. Let me know if it blows up on your browser

The "Economics of Star Trek" page has been rewritten. When I wrote it, I had assumed that the dismal failure of communism was a given, so I didn't bother justifying the condemnation of communism that was implicit in the article. However, I received numerous flame mails (as well as some thoughtful criticism, to be fair), so I added some more explanation. BTW, as a note to those who said that an engineer has no business discussing history or economics, not only is that an ad hominem attack, but it presumes knowledge of my background which you do not possess. In fact, I studied the failure of communism in depth during a third-year 20th century Russian history course in university (and no, I didn't fail the course; I got an A. Now let's see a history major take a third year advanced engineering thermodynamics course and do the same).

Xisiqomelir wrote:

verilon wrote:Unfortunately, I missed last year's hooha.

Last year = merger with that trekkie board.

evilcat4000 wrote:

Xisiqomelir wrote:

verilon wrote:Unfortunately, I missed last year's hooha.

Last year = merger with that trekkie board.

Ex astria scientia to be precise.

Darth Wong wrote:The SPAMWORLD posts were not actually deleted. They are being kept in a top-secret area, under guard with police dogs and ruthless mercenaries.

Darth Wong wrote:The SPAMWORLD posts were not actually deleted. They are being kept in a top-secret area, under guard with police dogs and ruthless mercenaries.

Ghost Rider wrote:

Darth Wong wrote:The SPAMWORLD posts were not actually deleted. They are being kept in a top-secret area, under guard with police dogs and ruthless mercenaries.

Iraq?

Damn, Mike so you are smooth.

Ghost Rider wrote:

Darth Wong wrote:The SPAMWORLD posts were not actually deleted. They are being kept in a top-secret area, under guard with police dogs and ruthless mercenaries.

Iraq?

Damn, Mike so you are smooth.

Sharp-kun wrote:

Darth Wong wrote:The SPAMWORLD posts were not actually deleted. They are being kept in a top-secret area, under guard with police dogs and ruthless mercenaries.

Will they ever see the light of day again?

verilon wrote:Wait a minute... I dropped below 14k posts again... WTF? I'm missing about 400 posts... I only made about 250 yesterday..

Darth_Zod wrote:

verilon wrote:Wait a minute... I dropped below 14k posts again... WTF? I'm missing about 400 posts... I only made about 250 yesterday..

i dropped below 2500 after the reset myself, which is odd considering i hit the 2500 mark -before- i started posting in spamworld.