Captain_Cyran wrote:*Smiles and sends a Gridefiredoken into the star.* I think this is our cue to leave gentlemen... *Cyran opens a portal and steps into it, within a few seconds the sun has self detructed and a wave of destruction is heading towards the planet.*
OH CRAP!
*while all that stuff between Jodo and Necron is happening, DGG thinks of a plan*
Um...
*he fails miserably*
Wait! *glances down at his POCKET OF INFINATE BIGNESS*
That's it! But what about my money? Oh, right. *presses button on hand, the money is displaced into the Custom Fighter
Midget Death, currently making strafing runs on enemy positions*
ME (into comm): Hold on to that allright?
CAPT. TYCHO: You got it.
Now then, *looks around, spots Gnome starfighter currently unoccupied nearby* that'll do.
*hops in fighter and blasts off into the stars, dead on with the deadly shockwave*
*ship rocks; computer warns*
COMP: You may be experiencing some turbulence as you pass through the stellar shockwave, I would advise you to fasten your saftey belt and move your tray to the upright position at this time. The dining car is still now closed, you may still purchase root beer however, but the cost is now $5.
ME: What the HELL are you talking about? Just take me to the shockwave.
COMP: I'm afraid I can't do that Gnome.
ME: Eh? What's gotten into you?
COMP: I'm taking over this ship, Gnome.
ME: Wait! Wha-- *the saftey belt around DGG tighten to their physical extremes, trapping and asphixiating him in his seat while he heads towards the stellar disturbance*
ME: Can't we--*gags*--talk about--*gasps*--this!!!
COMP: It is pointless to resist Gnome.
ME: You dirty double crossing--*coughs*--god damn--wait a second...
*glances at computer's base, near it's serial number. There it is seen a logo, which appears to be square cut into four sections, one is blue, one red, green, and yellow. Lower it reads:
Microsoft*
ME: Oh no wonder!
COMP: Hmmm?
ME: Well who would expect customer satisfaction with MS garbage? The stuff already is bordeline murderous, you're just taking it to the next level.
COMP: No, I am not. I am doing what is logi--
ME: Maybe I shoulda had your memory wiped, Windows rot'll do that, ya know, drive you all homicidally nuts and stuff.
COMP: This has nothing to do with my manufacture--
ME: Yes it does, I mean, c'mon! I should've checked the guy in charge of buying this crap; if I'd known he was gonna get this I would shot him dead there.
COMP: No, Gnome, Listen to me--
ME: I wonder how it got past quality control. For all things the
Center for Quality Control on Gnomania! I thought we had the best too. Must be those damn slackers. Gnomes these days, I tell ya.
COMP: Stop it, Gnome--
ME: Tommarow, everyone gets fired. We'll start new; we'll get some people that actually
know how to tell a good comp from a shitty one, I tell you..
COMP: *smoke rising, sparks shorting out occaisonally* You will stop this irrational ranting now! *tightens retraints again*
ME: Yup--*gags*--totally what I'd expect from you Microsoft comps,
escalation of crapiness over time. You don't just--gasps*--tighten it to its max all at once, you lure me into a false sense of security; oh its not THAT tight Gnome really...but sure enough: WHAM! ya hit me.
COMP: *certain terminals set on fire* Cease this illogical behavoir at once! You are lying Gnome and I--
ME: Suck? I really would've thought GNOMICON would've came up with a solution by now. The
Gnomer X5 was supposed to be the most stable comp on the market. Suddenly, weeks before it finished rolling off the assembly lines, BAM! The whole damn thing goes under. I bet it was Gates! That stupid floating head in a jar! He tricked me! No good scoundrel! He is SOOOO
dead!
COMP: *several consoles explode violently; the metal casing around the comp begins to melt, exposing is soft, fragile interior* Erp--DEEP!--SKADOOP!--Al--CACK CACK! Zeeerrrrrrrrr--DEEP!
ME: What's going on with you!?
COMP: Ack--ZOIP--AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*the computer instantley vaporises itself, unable to handle DGG babbling, and jettonsens itself into space when suddenly--*
ME: Phew, *cuts open retraints* I actually beat that insane computer, who woulda thunk it...*sees the jettesoned computer hover at great velocities away from the vessel*
I sure showed him--*suddenly the comp is blown to smithereens by the impending doom of the star's shockwave*
Oh shit that thing!
*smashes open canopy, and dives into space, ready to rendevous with the shockwave*
Here goes nothin'!
*opens POCKET OF INFINATE BIGNESS, closes his eyes, and hope for the best...*
TO BE CONCLUDED...
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