Who the FUCK is Paris Hilton?

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2003-12-03 12:44pm

Darth Wong wrote:
SirNitram wrote:It isn't even good porn.
Of course not. Given the way we feel about this rich spoiled bitch, I'd nominate her for a Max Hardcore film. Those of you who have seen them will know why.

Either that, or have her do a Ron Jeremy cumback special.

Sam Or I · Post by **Sam Or I** » 2003-12-03 03:04pm

I have never heard of her until rumors of the sex tapes popped up, then the simple life was advertised.

Well I watched the show all the way through, and well, people like her add nothing to this world.

Hamel · Post by **Hamel** » 2003-12-03 03:33pm

Sam Or I wrote: people like her add nothing to this world.

Except wank material

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-12-03 03:53pm

Hamel wrote:
Sam Or I wrote: people like her add nothing to this world.
Except wank material

You must have low standards then.

RedImperator · Post by **RedImperator** » 2003-12-03 04:07pm

Lord Pounder wrote:
Hamel wrote:
Sam Or I wrote: people like her add nothing to this world.
Except wank material
You must have low standards then.

Hey, give credit where it's due. If you don't mind girls who look like they'd be blown over if you farted in their general direction, she does look pretty good.

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-12-03 04:16pm

I'm a guy who gets a stuffy if the wind changes and she does little for me. Sure i'd fuck her in the ass, but i'm the same guy who'd screw the Olsen Twins once they become legal

Nathan F · Post by **Nathan F** » 2003-12-03 04:37pm

Col. Crackpot wrote:
Nathan F wrote:But i'd still do both of them
Nicole Ritchie isn't even that good looking. Both of them have personalities that are about as attractive as Leona Helmsly and Paris Hilton has swallowed enough dick paste to wallpaper the Toronto SkyDome.

But would you do them?

Mr. Sinister · Post by **Mr. Sinister** » 2003-12-03 05:02pm

Paris: "What's a Wal-Mart? Is that a place where you get wall stuff?" Just one of many priceless gems from the sort-of beautiful but oh so hollow-headed Paris Hilton. To borrow a phrase from the FUQ, I can't believe that someone could be that stupid and not accidently kill themselves.

And you won't believe how many people are willing to defend her. All of her rich friends say that she's a really smart and nice girl, and the stupid , spoiled little rich bitch we all know and love is just an act. Just a character she's playing.

Well if that's true then she's one HELL of an actress.

Lord Poe · Post by **Lord Poe** » 2003-12-03 05:03pm

You guys would really want to fuck this bitch? She has no tits, and no ass. She looks so much like a 12 year old by she gives Michael Jackson a boner.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-12-03 05:05pm

Form what I've gathered, she's not that bright, and she's only known because of her family connextinos that would make President Bush jealous. I don't see what she's given to the world other than those sex tapes and envy for everyone who had to do some work to got where they are.

Personally, I'm getting tired of her.

Solid Snake · Post by **Solid Snake** » 2003-12-03 05:58pm

Well, why not put her in the 1800's house. Wouldnt it be funny to see those two dumb bitches build their own house, milk cows, chop wood and such. Then it would be a matter if they starve or freeze first.

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2003-12-03 06:29pm

Lord Pounder wrote:I'm a guy who gets a stuffy if the wind changes and she does little for me. Sure i'd fuck her in the ass, but i'm the same guy who'd screw the Olsen Twins once they become legal

I'd fuck the Olsen twins without question.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-12-03 06:32pm

Nathan F wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:
SirNitram wrote:It isn't even good porn.
Of course not. Given the way we feel about this rich spoiled bitch, I'd nominate her for a Max Hardcore film. Those of you who have seen them will know why.
Could you elaborate a bit more for those of us who aren't as learned in the porno arts?

Do you really want details? Or does the phrase "forcing her to drink his cum out of her own ass with a long straw" tell you enough that you don't need to know more?

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-12-03 06:59pm

It kind of reminds me of MTV's Rich Girls.

People so dumb that one thinks that clothes are such a necessity that they should be free.

I think it would be more ironic if it was the daughter of Tommy Hilfiger, whose daughter is on the show.

Jawawithagun · Post by **Jawawithagun** » 2003-12-03 08:01pm

Okay, I admit it. I too would bed her. Though, seeing her sister in Simple Life made me turn of the telly immediately. BLEARGH!

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2003-12-03 08:07pm

There was nothing else on last night so I ended up watching The Simple Life. Let's just say that I've taken more productive shits in my life.

TrailerParkJawa · Post by **TrailerParkJawa** » 2003-12-03 08:22pm

Wicked Pilot wrote:There was nothing else on last night so I ended up watching The Simple Life. Let's just say that I've taken more productive shits in my life.

Hopefully, not while you were flying.

I did not bother to watch the show. Im sure they edited it to make her look profoundly stupid and ignorant, instead of just stupid. But you never know.

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2003-12-03 08:45pm

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:Who is she, and what the hell did she do to get popular/on the news/infamous?

EDIT: I heard she did some porn. What's so special about her?

Exactly, she's a fuck, not on my list, I like real people.

PrinceofLowLight · Post by **PrinceofLowLight** » 2003-12-03 11:39pm

I was wondering if she was actually related or if she was just some idiot model who thought "Paris Hilton" sounded like a classy name. She isn't actually the HEIR of the Hilton, though, is she? Just a mooching relative, right?

Illuminatus Primus · Post by **Illuminatus Primus** » 2003-12-04 12:19am

PrinceofLowLight wrote:I was wondering if she was actually related or if she was just some idiot model who thought "Paris Hilton" sounded like a classy name. She isn't actually the HEIR of the Hilton, though, is she? Just a mooching relative, right?

Nope, she is.

The tabloids even call her "Paris the Heiress."

RedImperator · Post by **RedImperator** » 2003-12-04 12:32am

I saw "The Simple Life" tonight. Telling scene: halfway through the first day of their first ever job, on a dairy farm, they decide to stop working and jump in the owner's hot tub. Then they take a nap in his living room. They're honestly baffled when they're fired. Actually, they don't REALIZE they're fired until they get home and somebody tells them.

This show is great. The only thing that would be better is thirty minutes of actual train wreck footage.

Post by **Dalton** » 2003-12-04 12:46am

RedImperator wrote:I saw "The Simple Life" tonight. Telling scene: halfway through the first day of their first ever job, on a dairy farm, they decide to stop working and jump in the owner's hot tub. Then they take a nap in his living room. They're honestly baffled when they're fired. Actually, they don't REALIZE they're fired until they get home and somebody tells them.

This show is great. The only thing that would be better is thirty minutes of actual train wreck footage.

Ohh, that was some great shit. Though the show is horribly mistitled: What Paris Hilton USED to live was The Simple Life. What she's living now is FUCKING REALITY for most Americans.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-12-04 12:52am

Why do they call it "The Simple Life?" Shouldn't they call it "The Simpleton?"

RedImperator · Post by **RedImperator** » 2003-12-04 01:02am

Darth Wong wrote:Why do they call it "The Simple Life?" Shouldn't they call it "The Simpleton?"

Because working your ass off to survive is apparently simpler than having enough money to do literally anything you want. Though I'm willing to entertain the notion that the title is intended to be ironic.

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2003-12-04 09:21pm

If I were to watch that show on any regular basis, it would be in the vane hope that those two twits get kicked out/quit before the 30 days are up, or someone gives them the smack down of smack downs for their heinous incompetance and general twit like behavior.

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Who the FUCK is Paris Hilton?

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