Boys don't cook

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-05-01 12:43pm

Peanut Butter Cookies

1 cup butter (it says shortening, but Crisco tastes funny)
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 cup granulated sugar
1 cup brown sugar
2 eggs, beaten
1 cup peanut butter
2 1/2 cups flour
1/8 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons baking soda

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F and grease some cookie sheets. In a mixing bowl, thoroughly cream the shortening, vanilla, and sugars. Add the eggs and beat well. Stir in the peanut butter. Mix together the flour, salt, and baking soda, and add to the peanut butter mixture, combining thoroughly. Form into tiny balls with the palm of your hands and place on the cookie sheets. Press each cookie twice with the back of a fork to make a crisscross design. Bake about 8-10 minutes or until firm.

And in case you don't know how to measure out something sticky like peanut butter, get a 2-cup measuring cup, fill with one cup of water, and then dump in lumps of peanut butter until it goes up to the 2-cup mark. Dump out the water, and voila! You have 1 cup of peanut butter.

irishmick79 · Post by **irishmick79** » 2003-05-01 12:43pm

Beer Can Chicken

This one is actually for the grill. After you season up the inside and outside of your full chicken, you basically stick a half full can of beer up the chicken's rear, and set it on the grill for about an hour, hour and a half. Absolutely unbelieveable. Whatever you do don't drink the beer afterwards! If you get that idea in your head, it's time for you to go to bed.

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2003-05-01 12:50pm

Zaia wrote:Chicken Parm

Ok, so this is the quick & easy way to do this. Go to the grocery store, get the pre-packaged breaded chicked fillets (they come in packs of 8 or 10, I think), some mozzerella cheese, a jar of your favourite red sauce (I use any thick one that has a gazillion 'schrooms in it and then add my own spices, etc.), and a box of your favourite pasta (I personally like Barilla's "Campanella" the best). Cook the pasta to al dente (firm but cooked), drain it, mix in a little bit of red sauce (enough to color the pasta) and then dump the pasta in the bottom of a large pan. Place the chicken fillets on top, drizzle red sauce on top of each piece of chicken, and then place slices of cheese on top of that. Stick into a preheated oven (350 degrees, I think?) for about 10 minutes (until the chicken is heated--remember, with the prepackaged cutlets, they're already cooked--and the cheese is melted nicely.

Really easy and really yummy. Mmmmmm.

Now let me find something for dessert....

bah! amatuer!
chris' chicken parm

well tenderized breasts (a chicken's, not zaia's) pound them with a tenderizer hammer thingie until they are flat.
dip them in an egg wash and into flour, back into the egg wash and then into a breadcrum/seasoning mix (availablt at the local market).
fry in extra virgin olive oil at about 350-375 degrees F until golden brown.

prep the sauce. all you realy need are some fresh roma tomatoes and basil with a pinch of salt and a few cloves of garlic. dice the tomatoes, drain away the excess liquida nd warm in a saucepan. add basil salt and FINELY chopped garlic cloves. you really want to just warm the mixture, don't let it simmer too long.

place chicken on broiling pan, cover with tomato mixture as well as provolone and motzzerella cheeses. broil until cheese is melted and bubbly.

serve with marinated artichoke, salad and some nice crusty sicillian bread!

XaLEv · Post by **XaLEv** » 2003-05-01 12:50pm

Rob Wilson wrote: Jar of Mushrooms? Don't you get them fresh?

Nah. That's just how we always made it.

And it's not a very big jar. Bit smaller than a soda can.

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-05-01 12:59pm

Col. Crackpot wrote:bah! amatuer!
chris' chicken parm

Hey, I know that most of the guys reading this aren't going to want to go gourmet. They want something simple and tasty. Ta-da!

well tenderized breasts (a chicken's, not zaia's) pound them with a tenderizer hammer thingie until they are flat.

LMAO

Thanks for the clarification, because that would hurt like FUCK! And then I'd need Rob to the rescue again!

Iceberg · Post by **Iceberg** » 2003-05-01 01:01pm

Zaia wrote:
Col. Crackpot wrote:bah! amatuer!
chris' chicken parm
Hey, I know that most of the guys reading this aren't going to want to go gourmet. They want something simple and tasty. Ta-da!

Well, you're tasty but you don't seem all that simple...

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-05-01 01:16pm

Iceberg wrote:
Zaia wrote:Hey, I know that most of the guys reading this aren't going to want to go gourmet. They want something simple and tasty. Ta-da!
Well, you're tasty but you don't seem all that simple...

*chuckles and kisses Ice's cheek* True, not simple, but neither am I gourmet....somewhere around the complexity of a complex carbohydrate, methinks.

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-05-01 01:23pm

Zaia wrote:*chuckles and kisses Ice's cheek* True, not simple, but neither am I gourmet....somewhere around the complexity of a complex carbohydrate, methinks.

Gourmet takes too long, dear.

I do it for dates...and usually need the better part of Saturday getting the ingredients...then I have to clean my place...and groom the kitty...then, and only then kitchen becomes this warzone from hell.

What you do is perfectly fine

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-05-01 01:29pm

Ahhh, you know, guys, I was a bit bummed *points to my boy-related: GAH! thread* but after reading the first two pages of this thread again, my spirits are doing a bit better. Thanks.

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-05-01 01:31pm

We aim to please ma'am

.

XaLEv · Post by **XaLEv** » 2003-05-01 01:32pm

Zaia wrote:Ahhh, you know, guys, I was a bit bummed *points to my boy-related: GAH! thread* but after reading the first two pages of this thread again, my spirits are doing a bit better. Thanks.

Glad to help, dear.

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-05-01 01:33pm

This is tres yummy for the summertime. And a bit gourmet.

Loster Salad

3 cups cooked lobster meat
1/2 cup finely chopped celery
1/2 cup mayonnaise (light mayo or Miracle Whip yummy too)
1 1/2 tablespoons heavy cream
salt to taste
1 head Bibb lettuce

Cut the lobster meat into large, bite-size pieces, place them in a bowl, and add the celery. Blend the mayonnasie and cream in a small bowl, then gently combine with the lobster, toss to mix, and add salt. Arrange a bed of lettuce leaves and put the loster salad on top (ooh la la, fancy-shmancy!).

Serves four. Mmmmmmm.....

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-05-01 01:53pm

Well, as far as uni goes, the most reliable thing I cook tends to be chilli, but with a good handful of cumin (for 4, not 1...

) in as well, Jamie Oliver recipe I think, but it tastes fantastic.

I really can't be doing with gourmet at uni, it tends to be too much hassle, at best, I save it for special occassions for visiting my mates in other universities, there was a pretty good crab, chilli, coconut and spinach soup, tasted pretty good. Wish I hadnt lost the recipe. Oh, and there was this rather nice Creole Chicken sort of thing, with chilli's, pineapple, banana, am too lazy to retrieve the recipe, but if anyones desperate, drop me a line.

Oooh, just remembered another good one for uni tucker, egg, bacon, crouton and spinach salad, served warm, its very nice- essentially, spinach, lightly cooked, eggs - runny yolks, bacon - damn crispy and some fried bread croutons. Mix together.

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-05-01 01:57pm

You know, I don't want to derail this topic again, but as I walk around my house, I keep looking down at my breasts, trying to figure out what's so scary about them. They just look pleasantly round and cuddly to me.

Eleas, what have you done to me?!?!!

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-05-01 02:05pm

Zaia wrote:You know, I don't want to derail this topic again, but as I walk around my house, I keep looking down at my breasts, trying to figure out what's so scary about them. They just look pleasantly round and cuddly to me.

Eleas, what have you done to me?!?!!

I don't think they're frightening

.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-05-01 02:12pm

Bah...everyone should know my "creations" are the best things in existence.

Get a bit of anything that you think may go, and at least one that you think won't.

Fry everything with chillies.

then add it to some kind of tomato sauce thing.

Pour on pasta or chips....tastes like an angry god.

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-05-01 02:15pm

Pfft weak sauce material.

Eaten worse in the year of hell...and eaten spicier in Korea from my family.

Post by **Rob Wilson** » 2003-05-01 02:16pm

Zaia wrote:
LMAO

Thanks for the clarification, because that would hurt like FUCK! And then I'd need Rob to the rescue again!

Rob : Robman to the rescue!!

Knife : I thought we established you're Robin, not Robman!"

Rob : "I can't be Robin, I'm too old and I've got hair on my balls."

Knife : "For fucks sake Rob put those away, what are you an exhibitionist?"

Rob : "No! I am Robman, Defender of machismo, Eater of high calorie snacks and Master of all women!"

Zaia : "Rob, will you please take that towel off, it looks nothing like a cape, and make me a plate of crumpets. There's a good boy."

Rob : "Yes zaia." *shuffles off in deflated manner.* "Can too be a master of Women, if I want."

Zaia : "Yes of course you can dear, don't forget to drizzle the honey on properly." *turns to Kelly* "They're just so cute when they try to act macho."

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2003-05-01 02:17pm

I have noticed this thread has begun to suffer from a fascinating new infection.... i call it Zaia Pox.

Any thread is succeptable to infection, although threads in off-topic seem to be the most affected. I believe this is an infection cause by the viral strain professorus-musicus-adorableas.
It starts simple enough. the virus enters the host with a giggle and a wink-wink and ka-blammo! every heterosexual homo sapian with with a twig between it's legs falls victim and is reduced to a swooning, blushing flirtatios bafoon. I must forward this information to the boys' at RML so a cure can be developed!

lol awww to hell with it, now i.....aggghhh.....i've been infected!

Post by **Rob Wilson** » 2003-05-01 02:18pm

Zaia wrote:Ahhh, you know, guys, I was a bit bummed *points to my boy-related: GAH! thread* but after reading the first two pages of this thread again, my spirits are doing a bit better. Thanks.

Anything to help - though don't forget I'm a pathalogical Jester in most posts.

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-05-01 02:19pm

Well we believe you're master of women

.

Now back to cooking thing...who makes Suprise dishes(sort of when you dump a bunch of stuff that might work into a really big pot and see what comes out)?

Post by **Rob Wilson** » 2003-05-01 02:21pm

The_Lumberjack wrote: Jamie Oliver

Arrrgh, don't mention tht twats name. It is the anti-christ lisping in the ears of everyone, making it's terible incantation "Pukka, Pukka, Pukka, Sweet."

The_Lumberjack wrote:I really can't be doing with gourmet at uni, it tends to be too much hassle, at best, I save it for special occassions for visiting my mates in other universities, there was a pretty good crab, chilli, coconut and spinach soup, tasted pretty good. Wish I hadnt lost the recipe. Oh, and there was this rather nice Creole Chicken sort of thing, with chilli's, pineapple, banana, am too lazy to retrieve the recipe, but if anyones desperate, drop me a line.

Hmm creole Chicken, now there's something i haven't made in a while. Hmm.

Post by **Rob Wilson** » 2003-05-01 02:23pm

Ghost Rider wrote:Well we believe you're master of women .

Now back to cooking thing...who makes Suprise dishes(sort of when you dump a bunch of stuff that might work into a really big pot and see what comes out)?

About once a month, take everything that is close to expiry/ or just odds and ends left and see what happens when you bung it together. Tends to work only for bachelors as the results rarly impress the opposite sex - especially when you have to drown most of it in 'Not Cool' Hot sauces.

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-05-01 02:26pm

Hey, he may be as annoying as hell, (growing more annoying than the ginger bloke from Food and Drink, bah, forgotten his name... dammit), but cumin in chilli works well, and some of his simpler stuff is really nice. That chicken with lemon, salt and pepper was simple but very tasty, and the Parma ham, mozzarella and nectarine salad has become a barbecue favourite...

*Edited to remove moronic over use of 'really'...

Iceberg · Post by **Iceberg** » 2003-05-01 02:31pm

Rob Wilson wrote:
The_Lumberjack wrote: Jamie Oliver
Arrrgh, don't mention tht twats name. It is the anti-christ lisping in the ears of everyone, making it's terible incantation "Pukka, Pukka, Pukka, Sweet."

I kinda liked his show until I realized that nobody who hasn't attended a cooking school could actually prepare some of the food he was making on his show. That kind of stuff kinda bugs me.