What would you do if you met God?

Sektor31 · Post by **Sektor31** » 2003-02-12 09:28pm

Eh? What would you do?

Utsanomiko · Post by **Utsanomiko** » 2003-02-12 09:30pm

I remember this old thread.

I'd still let him know he's just a Canaanite mountain deity, and tell him I don't care what he does with me; I lived my life as best as I could with what could be known.

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2003-02-12 09:30pm

Probably fall to my knees in awe.

Seggybop · Post by **Seggybop** » 2003-02-12 09:30pm

Which one?

Enforcer Talen · Post by **Enforcer Talen** » 2003-02-12 09:33pm

good question.

ask about the afterlife, one, and ask for stuff, two.

Post by **Kuja** » 2003-02-12 09:34pm

"So, you're the big guy, huh?"

Anarchist Bunny · Post by **Anarchist Bunny** » 2003-02-12 09:35pm

I'd see if he'd give me head. I mean come on, sure it's really unlikely, but so is he showing up, and your gonna have bragging rights for the rest of you fucking life.

"So what do you do?"

"Oh I'm a doctor to dying childre..."

"YEAH! WELL GOD SUCK MY COCK!"

Post by **weemadando** » 2003-02-12 09:37pm

Judeo-Christian god: Kick him in the nuts.

Buddha and other Chinese/Hindu deities: Go and get some good food and talk obscure philosophy.

Greek/Roman Pantheon: Get drunk. Go out and rape/torture/transmogrify some people. Then demand more tribute.

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-02-12 09:38pm

Say hello, of course.

jaeger115 · Post by **jaeger115** » 2003-02-12 09:41pm

Tell him "If you're soo powerful, why do you explode in rage every time one of these useless insignificant human beings badmouth you?"

See his reaction.

Anarchist Bunny · Post by **Anarchist Bunny** » 2003-02-12 09:43pm

jaeger115 wrote:Tell him "If you're soo powerful, why do you explode in rage every time one of these useless insignificant human beings badmouth you?"

See his reaction.

Add bitch on to the end of it and see how he reacts.

kojikun · Post by **kojikun** » 2003-02-12 09:43pm

I meet myself every time I look in the mirror. I always say how sexy I am.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-02-12 09:50pm

First, I'd ask him if he's the same vengeful asshole in the Bible. If he is, I'd find some contradiction in the Bible and ask him to explain it. If he isn't, I'd have a talk with him, and find out what he actually thinks. Then, I'd ask him ot do a favor for me: Get me hooked up with some hot chicks.

Uraniun235 · Post by **Uraniun235** » 2003-02-12 09:57pm

To hell with the blowjob, I'd ask if I could anally penetrate him.

"I got a blowjob from God."

"Yeah, well I fucked God in the ass."

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2003-02-12 09:57pm

Worship him and such.

SWPIGWANG · Post by **SWPIGWANG** » 2003-02-12 09:58pm

kill him. (if possible)

Post by **Dalton** » 2003-02-12 10:06pm

Nothing. Couldn't possibly meet something that didn't exist.

(muhahahaha)

Post by **Dalton** » 2003-02-12 10:06pm

Moved to SLM.

Post by **weemadando** » 2003-02-12 10:11pm

Dalton wrote:Moved to SLM.

DAmnit its SLAM, not SLM. It just sounds cooler.

The Dark · Post by **The Dark** » 2003-02-12 11:11pm

I'd hopefully have a Bible along with me and a pen and ask him to write what it's supposed to really be, instead of what the idiot scribes who couldn't translate properly wrote. The different manuscripts are irritating for the Prophets. Nearly every chapter has at least one textual variance, though most are minor (along the same importance as "red" compared to "rouge").

Sokar · Post by **Sokar** » 2003-02-12 11:59pm

Reaction 1 : OH SHIT!!!! ....Your fucking real ?

Reaction 2 : So, what the fuck were you thinking in puting 6billion diffrent religions out there ?.......Oh really , you spirit-cast the conflicts as deity only PPV's....you shrewd bitch, thats where Vince McMahon got the idea.

Reaction 3 : So....any way we can overlook thoes underage hookers in Thailand ? No....lake of fire, eternal torment......shit......

Reaction 4: Wheres the beer? No beer in heaven.......Michael smashed up the divine Caddy 5,000 years ago eh.......well off to Party with Lucifer then tata.......

SpacedTeddyBear · Post by **SpacedTeddyBear** » 2003-02-13 12:03am

I'd ask to see his starship.

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2003-02-13 12:17am

What does God need with a starship?

TrailerParkJawa · Post by **TrailerParkJawa** » 2003-02-13 12:25am

Ask him if he is hiring, or at least if I can have zero percent loan for 25 grand.

XaLEv · Post by **XaLEv** » 2003-02-13 01:07am

Yahweh/Jehova/Allah: "You're in my chair, bitch."

Eris: "Hey baby, pass the bowl."