SW Fanfic - Derek

Kelly Antilles · Post by **Kelly Antilles** » 2002-09-12 11:46am

I got this brilliant idea one day about how Derek "Hobbie" Klivian got his nickname. So, I wrote it into a fic.

http://www.angelfire.com/hi4/kantilles/Derek.html

it's kinda long, so I just linked to my website. Let me know what you think. I have quite a few more I'd like to post here and get feedback on.

Jack Lain · Post by **Jack Lain** » 2002-09-13 10:20pm

You know what, that was really good. You need to work on the way you handle dialogue. But over all that was a good read. Congrats man. Your character depth is nice and well done.

PM me and I'll explain about the dialogue part.

Overall well worth the time I spent reading. Nice job. Thumbs up from me.

Eleas · Post by **Eleas** » 2002-09-20 10:31am

Kelly Antilles wrote:I got this brilliant idea one day about how Derek "Hobbie" Klivian got his nickname. So, I wrote it into a fic.

http://www.angelfire.com/hi4/kantilles/Derek.html

it's kinda long, so I just linked to my website. Let me know what you think. I have quite a few more I'd like to post here and get feedback on.

You know, I meant to comment on this story earlier. Very enjoyable, it was.

Post by **Kuja** » 2002-09-26 07:30pm

Damn. That's incredible!

Post by **Dalton** » 2002-09-26 07:53pm

Rough around the edges, but this should be expected from an off-the-cuff fic. You have a real talent for portraying emotions, but I think you should work on your descriptiveness and exposition a little; the first segment seemed almost disjointed from the story. All in all, enjoyable

StarDestroyer.Net BBS

SW Fanfic - Derek

SW Fanfic - Derek

Re: SW Fanfic - Derek