December 28, 2003: According to the prescient crystal ball of our beloved Iconomics Editor, Swami R. Bastiat, here's what's going to happen in the way of business news in 2004:
1. Buckling to pressure from labor union leaders, Wal-Mart will ban the employment of illegal aliens.
2. With its labor costs soaring because of the ban on illegal aliens, Wal-Mart will triple its prices, leading its blue collar customers to complain bitterly about the oppression of working people by big business.
3. China will denounce low-wage competition from Alabama resulting from the cheap American dollar, and impose high tariffs on American textiles to protect Chinese jobs and wages.
4. In a reprise of her Oscar-winning role in Norma Rae, Sally Field will organize a protest against the Chinese textile tariffs, exhorting union members in southern milltowns to rally in support of free trade and globalization.
5. A coalition of Hollywood celebrities, organized labor, and Greenpeace activists will force the closing of 10,000 third-world sweatshops.
6. Several million displaced former sweatshop workers and their families will starve to death after their factories close, but others will survive by begging, stealing, and selling their children into prostitution. Barbra Streisand will proudly don her new pair of $850 American-manufactured designer jeans for an ABC News TV interview and pronounce: "Justice has been done!"
7. Rising Iraqi oil production will force down the market price of gasoline in the US early in the year to $0.99 per gallon.
8. Federal excise taxes to finance increasingly expensive ethanol subsidies, promised by politicians for agribusiness campaign contributors and Iowa farmers, will force up the market price of gasoline in the US late in the year to $4.99 per gallon.
9. Senator Robert Byrd (D-WV), the king of pork barrel projects, will complete his long-term program to convert the entire state of West Virginia into a paved federal interstate freeway.
10. Senator Robert Byrd (D-WV) will be defeated for reelection in a stunning upset because he is unable to come up with any further pork barrel projects appropriate for a state that has been converted into paved interstate highway.
I'm studying for the CPA exam. Have a nice summer, and if you're down just sit back and realize that Joe is off somewhere, doing much worse than you are.
Thanks for this steaming pile of shit from the Iconotards
"Right now we can tell you a report was filed by the family of a 12 year old boy yesterday afternoon alleging Mr. Michael Jackson of criminal activity. A search warrant has been filed and that search is currently taking place. Mr. Jackson has not been charged with any crime. We cannot specifically address the content of the police report as it is confidential information at the present time, however, we can confirm that Mr. Jackson forced the boy to listen to the Howard Stern show and watch the movie Private Parts over and over again."
December 28, 2003: According to the prescient crystal ball of our beloved Iconomics Editor, Swami R. Bastiat, here's what's going to happen in the way of business news in 2004:
1. Buckling to pressure from labor union leaders, Wal-Mart will ban the employment of illegal aliens.
Hamel wrote:Thanks for this steaming pile of shit from the Iconotards
Someone is humor-impaired.
Jesus, you think converting WV to a freeway might be a joke?
Oh come the fuck on
Jesus H Billiards, Wal Mart never had to deal with a single fucking union until '97, and the employees still get shafted and intimidated by management when word of unionization gets around. Maybe there'd be humor there if the unions were fucking Wally up the ass, but it ain't happenin'
And there's only so many times you can associate Byrd with pork barrel spendning and have humor in it (Iconoclast loves to repeat the same shit over and over). This isn't funny, it's "dur hurrr"
"Right now we can tell you a report was filed by the family of a 12 year old boy yesterday afternoon alleging Mr. Michael Jackson of criminal activity. A search warrant has been filed and that search is currently taking place. Mr. Jackson has not been charged with any crime. We cannot specifically address the content of the police report as it is confidential information at the present time, however, we can confirm that Mr. Jackson forced the boy to listen to the Howard Stern show and watch the movie Private Parts over and over again."
Now, that I can understand as humour~ Too bad they don't put that kind of effort into their articles
"Right now we can tell you a report was filed by the family of a 12 year old boy yesterday afternoon alleging Mr. Michael Jackson of criminal activity. A search warrant has been filed and that search is currently taking place. Mr. Jackson has not been charged with any crime. We cannot specifically address the content of the police report as it is confidential information at the present time, however, we can confirm that Mr. Jackson forced the boy to listen to the Howard Stern show and watch the movie Private Parts over and over again."
